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(see also our books pages)
The UK is the divorce capital of Europe. As families split
up and re-group, other patterns become established. Step
families are formed, half brothers and sisters are born,
and parents with children from second marriages are sometimes
torn between divided loyalties. But other families proliferate:
families where the grandparents have become parents of their
children's children; families where one or both parents
are gay or lesbian, with custody of a child from a previous
relationship; "double" families where perhaps
a father shares his time between two families. (Jill
Curtis - Making and Breaking Families).
Jill Curtis, a psychoanalytic psychotherapist, addresses
some of the issues and questions arising from this quite
profound social change both in her books and through her
website, the address of which is www.family2000.org.uk
Grandparents
The rise in the number of divorces has meant
also an increase in the number of ‘divorced’ grandparents.
Divorce hurts. It hurts more than just the couple who split
up: the ripples spread far into the extended family and
friends. There is an ever-growing number of grandparents
who have ‘lost’ a beloved grandchild because of a divorce,
where the parent with custody ‘punishes’ the in-laws too.
Think of the band of grandparents who for a number of reasons,
may find themselves parenting for a second time around,
as they take over the full time care of grandchildren. Family2000
provides a starting point for the help
and support available for grandparents on the web today.
Stepparents
Today, with so many divorces and second marriages,
the reality is that many children have two women in their
lives, who are often at war with each other, having been
brought together by loving the same man. Men can find themselves
equally at a loss with ‘instant fatherhood’. But as a stepparent
- or indeed a parent - of a child it is important to remember
that it takes time to rebuild a family and to think this
can happen almost over night is courting trouble. The pages
on stepfamilies
on Family2000 will help lay the foundations on which
to build.
Single
Parents
Each single parent has to find his or her own
way of re-assembling the family jigsaw, and this may be
with some help from the other parent or not. On balance,
the message which comes through is that a parent on his
or her own, creating a new family, does feel very vulnerable.
On family2000onwards.com you will find help,
support and information for you as a single parent.
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(The above are extracts from family2000onwards.com, a website
provided by Jill Curtis to answer questions about different family
issues, to provide help and information and making it easier to
reach the areas in which you are particularly interested. Jill
has written a number of books on families and how they are affected
by divorce and separation as well as, for example,
Find Your Way Through Divorce, an invaluable guide
to help you get through the process).
In addition to the above, the following websites will be a source
of useful information:
Adoption
Information Line
Designed to provide adoption related information, covering
such things as what kind of people adopt, adoption law, what is
involved in an adoption home study and much other information.
Website: www.adoption.org.uk/
Association
for Shared Parenting
Promotes the need for estranged parents to play an equal
part in the care and upbringing of their children. Has a number
of regional branches, and offers help and support to parents,
grandparents and other relatives of a child who, as a result of
separation or divorce, is experiencing difficulties. Publishes
a quarterly magazine covering a wide range of relevant topics.
Website: www.sharedparenting.org.uk/
Both
Parents Forever
Produce a series of information packs designed to explain a person's
rights and the court precedents with respect to divorce, separation
and care proceedings. Packs include General Information (e.g.
obtaining school reports, consultation on education, medical consultation),
Grandparents Pack, Child Abduction and Enforcement of Overseas
contact orders. In addition to giving help and advice, the organisation
campaigns for changes in the law. Assistance is also given in
writing affidavits, statements etc and sometimes even a friend
can be provided to sit with a person in court if they are litigating
in person.
39 Cloonmore Avenue Orpington Kent BR6 9LE
Telephone: 01689 854 343
CAFCASS
This site may be of interest in understanding how CAFCASS is meant
to work.
Website: www.cafcass.gov.uk/
Child
Abduction Unit, Lord Chancellors Office
The Child
Abduction Unit is responsible for administering the work of
the European Conventions on Child Abduction. There is also a valuable
series of links to other resources both in the UK and overseas
related to the abduction of children.
Childcarelink
Childlincarelink is a government site designed to give easy
access to childcare facilities in your area as well as an insight
into the various types, such as pre-school, childminders, nurseries
etc. It is seachable by postcode and provides telephone numbers
of local sources of information. Website: www.childcarelink.gov.uk/
Childline
Childline is the national helpline for young people in trouble
or danger. In addition to providing help to children, there is
assistance for parents, for example in the form publications and
factsheets. The latter includes one on the subject of Stepfamilies,
providing statistics, the worries of stepchildren and how Childline
can help. Website: www.childline.org.uk/
Childrens
Legal Centre
Unique, independent national charity concerned with law and policy
affecting children and young people. The centre runs a free and
confidential legal advice and information service covering all
aspects of law and policy and is open to children, young people
and anyone with concerns about them.
Website:www.childrenslegalcentre.com/.
The Education Legal Advocacy Unit provides advice and representation
to children and/or parents involved in education disputes with
a school or local education unit, and operates in the South East
of England. Advice, negotiation services and mediation can however
be offered outside of this area. In addition publications, including
a number of useful information sheets and booklets are available.
The centre also carries out research as well as policy and campaigning
work. It welcomes comments and information on all aspects of related
law and practice.
Daycare
Trust
The Daycare Trust is the national childcare charity. It has been
working since 1980 to promote high quality affordable childcare
for all. Their website will help you find out more about childcare
and make the right childcare decision for your child. Website:
www.daycaretrust.org.uk
Equal
Parenting
The Equal Parenting Council is the UK chapter of the Children's
Rights Council and aims to raise public awareness of children
being taken away from one parent after a separation for no material
reason. It wants both parents, Mother and Father, to be treated
equally by the law after divorce or separation for the sake of
the children and wants an end to the current situation whereby
the parent who no longer lives with the children (the non-resident
parent) has no rights and the resident parent has all the rights.
Website: www.equalparenting.org
Families
Need Fathers
Represents non residential parents and their children, and is
primarily concerned with the problems with keeping parents and
children in contact after family breakdown. A national network
of volunteers provides advice and support on children's issues
to separated, divorced or unmarried parents. Publishes booklets
and information packs, and a quarterly journal.
Website: www.fnf.org.uk
Family
2000
Family2000 is a site dedicated to providing help on family issues,
whether you are a single parent, married, a grandparent or step
parent. It covers a very wide range of family issues, passing
on advice and information from bringing up children alone, step
families blending together right through to grandparents trying
to understand the complexity of day to day life.
Website: www.family2000.org.uk
Family
Rights Group
Family Rights Group (FRG) was established as a registered charity
in 1974 to provide advice and support for families whose children
are involved with social services. FRG works to improve the services
received by these families.
Website: www.frg.org.uk
Fathers
Direct
Fathers Direct is a charity founded in 1999 by professionals with
expertise in social work, in social work, family policy, business
development and communications. It exists to support the welfare
of children by the positive and active involvement of fathers
and male carers in their lives.
Website: www.fathersdirect.com/
Fathers 4 Justice (F4J)
Fathers 4 Justice (F4J) is a civil rights movement campaigning
for a child's right to see both parents and grandparents. The
group comprises Fathers, Mothers, Grandparents, Teachers, Doctors,
Company Directors, Policemen, Barristers – a complete cross section
of society – all whom believe that Britain is needlessly creating
a nation of children without parents and parents without children.
Website: www.fathers-4-justice.org/
Grandparents
Association
Gives advice and information and support to grandparents of
children affected by a divorce or separation. It is the only national
registered charity for grandparents in the country. It was borne
out of anguish: the pain that some grandparents had to bear at
seeing their beloved grandchildren adopted from 'care' and yet
having no legal means to be heard asking for contact with these
children. The organisation aims to find creative solutions to
this lack of contact--for both grandparents and grandchildren.
Website: www.grandparents-association.org.uk/
HomeDad
UK support group dedicated to helping dads who are staying at
home to bring up their children. Its members are either at home
full-time, work part-time or are raising kids on their own.
Website: www.homedad.org.uk/
Homestart
This leading family support charity offers friendship, support
and practical help to families across the UK. The simple approach
is to offer the support of one volunteer parent to another parent
who is facing difficulties and has at least one child under five.
Website: www.home-start.org.uk/
How
to help your Children after Separation or Divorce
To be found on the CAFCASS site in pdf format, various online
booklets for parents and children answering questions on how children
are affected by divorce or separation, explaining how they often
feel and making suggestions on how to help them cope. See http://www.cafcass.gov.uk/English/Publications/InformationChildrenAdults.htm
Its
not your fault
A site from the NCH for children who are worried about their parents
splitting up, designed to help them understand a bit more and
to remember its not their fault. The site is divided into sections
for children, teenagers and parents.
Website: www.itsnotyourfault.org
Kidscape
Kidscape offers help with many problems experienced by young children
including bullying. They are based at 2 Grosvenor Gardens, London
SW1W 0DH (telephone 020 7730 3300)
Website: www.kidscape.org.uk/
Lone
Parents.org
Loneparents.org offers help and support to Single-Lone Parents
who are maybe finding it difficult to cope alone, ( whether they
be single mums or single dads) and to those parents who just want
a safe and secure place to meet and chat to friends online or
make new friends or find some mutual support from others in the
same situation.
Website: www.loneparents.org/
Mothers
Apart from their Children
A nation-wide support network for women living apart from their
children, run by volunteers who are or who have been "mothers
apart", usually through divorce or separation.
Website: www.matchmothers.org/
National
Association of Child Contact Centres
A National charity with 276 member centres around the country
which provide neutral venues where the children of separated families
can enjoy contact with one or both parents
Website: www.naccc.org.uk/
netdoctor.co.uk
"Talking
to children about divorce" (reviewed by Dr Joanne M.
Lee, GP) provides some useful information on how divorce affects
children and how you can make it less painful for them.
One
Parent Families Scotland
As well as providing an insight into the crucial role this
organisation plays in supporting lone parent families in Scotland,
the site also contains a wealth of information, for example, in
the form of online factsheets on subjects including benefits,
housing issues and costs, health, maintenance etc. Amongst many
others, there is also information on holidays for single parents
and details of Trust Funds where general assistance may be sought
by one parent families.
Website: www.opfs.org.uk
Opportunity
Links
Although not a Government site, Opportunity
Links is a voluntary organisation which provides information
free of charge, via the internet and touchscreen kiosks, to those
who have a need to find out about jobs, training and childcare
facilities. For example, there is information on childcare and
Working Families Tax Credit (including a calculator).
National
Council for One Parent Families
The National Council for One Parent Families promotes the
welfare of lone parents and their children. Its aim is to overcome
the poverty, isolation and social exclusion which so many face.
They offer parents the means to help themselves and their families
by providing information and advice, working with communities,
and by developing new solutions to meet changing needs. By becoming
an annual subscriber (current annual rate for lone parent membership
is £5) you will be kept up to date with the issues affecting one
parent families. Subscribers are offered a welcome pack of publications,
one copy of selected new publications, free quarterly newsletter,
special briefings etc. A range of excellent booklets cover such
topics as Maintenance and the Child Support Agency, Housing for
One Parent Families, Splitting Up (divorce and unmarried relationship
breakdown), Children: Legal Rights and Responsibilities of Parents
not Living Together and Getting it Right (a guide for lone parents
on Benefits and Tax).
Website: www.oneparentfamilies.org.uk/
National
Society for Children and Family Contact (NSCFC)
When a relationship breaks down it isn’t just the partners who
suffer. It’s the children who have most to lose; and not just
because of the stress of seeing their parents at odds. They also
risk losing contact with one of their parents, and with that parent’s
family too. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins: half their family,
half their life, can be devastated by parental acrimony. The NSCFC
believes that continuing contact with a child’s extended family
is vital for the child’s balanced development, and it works to
foster those all-important family contacts.
Website: www.nscfc.com/
NSPCC
The National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children
(NSPCC) is the UK's leading charity specialising in child protection
and the prevention of cruelty to children. It is the only children's
charity in the UK with statutory powers enabling it to act to
safeguard children at risk. The NSPCC exists to: prevent children
suffering significant harm as a result of cruelty; protect children
who are at risk of such harm; help children who have suffered
cruelty to overcome its effects; and to work to protect children
from further harm. There is a "Kids Zone" on the site.
Website: www.nspcc.org.uk/
Parental
Equality
A shared parenting and joint custody support group based in Ireland
which provides voluntary self-help support for both men and women,
promoting equal treatment for both as parents. It provides information
to parents who are having difficulty keeping contact with their
children or having custody/access difficulties. There is information
and advice available not only to those in Ireland, but relevant
to any families who find themselves with custody difficulties.
Website: http://homepages.iol.ie/~pe/
Parent
Line Plus
Parentline Plus (incorporating the National Stepfamily Association)
Confidential free phone help line offering a first point of contact
and support for up to 60,000 callers each year. It is staffed
by volunteers, all with parenting experience. It is for anyone
who is parenting a child-as a parent, stepparent, grandparent
or someone with a parental role such as a foster carer. Parentline
can act as a gateway to specialist or local support. Over half
the calls concern problems with a teenager. The issues covered
include truancy, bullying, drugs, physical abuse, teenage pregnancy
and suicide. Many others struggle to cope with a new baby or a
change in family circumstances such as separation or divorce.
Publications are available which provide information on the key
pressure points that affect people in changing families.
You can download various booklets and publications from the site
- it is a source of very useful suggestions from young people
affected directly by divorce, as to how you can provide support.
Website:www.parentlineplus.org.uk/
ParentsCentre
The site designed for parents with information on the national
curriculum, additional learning resources, school websites, performance
tables and included is a section on events and attraction of interest
to you and your children. Website: www.parentscentre.gov.uk/
Parents
4 Protest Wales
P4P Wales/Cymru are a direct action Parent Group demanding reforms
within the Welsh and UK Family Law Justice system in order to
protect children and help parents who are denied contact.
Website: www.parents4protest.co.uk
Psycare
- Parental Alienation Page
The website aims to stimulate debate and research on important
issues affecting today's families and learn from other's experiences.
As well as information on PAS, there are useful links to similar
sites.
Website: www.parentalalienation.org
Reunite
- International Child Abduction Centre
Reunite is the recognised charity specifically dealing with the
problem of parental child abduction and international custody
disputes. Its main objective is to provide a telephone advice
line offering practical advice and information on the issue of
parental child abduction and international custody disputes.
Website: www.reunite.org/
Schools
Inspection Reports
If you are looking to move or want more information on local schools
view the last OFSTED report, the database organised by type of
school and location.
Website: www.ofsted.gov.uk/reports/
Shared
Parenting Information Group
The mission of SPIG is to promote responsible shared parenting
after separation and divorce as well as making available information,
research and resources to all concerned.
Website: www.spig.clara.net/
Single
Parent Action Network
SPAN represents one parent families across England, Northern Ireland,
Scotland and Wales. Its membership includes small single parent
self-help groups, individual single parents, large charitable
organisations and all kinds of support groups which are concerned
in some way with supporting the needs of one parent families.
Its members may be divorced, separated, never married, heterosexual
or gay and from many different backgrounds and cultures. SPAN
also makes available grants for development and self-help, as
well as publishing a newsletter for its members and running training
courses.
Website: www.singleparents.org.uk/span
Solo
Parents Network
Solo Parents Network is an online social club for any single parent
at any stage of single parenting. . It is dedicated to making
healthy changes and relationships. Single parents share and provide
resources, inform, introduce and help in the lives of other single
parents.
Website: www.soloparentsnetwork.com
UK
Parents Online
A useful site offering parents help, friendship and support. There
are many interactive areas where you can meet other parents and
share experiences, advice, find the latest news and views. There
is also a comprehensive information database.
Website: www.ukparents.co.uk
YoungMinds
YoungMinds is the national charity committed to improving the
mental health of all children and young people. The site provides
details of the telephone helpline, leaflets, booklets, seminars
and training provided by the charity.
Website: www.youngminds.org.uk
