ONDIVORCE GENERAL AND CONTACT MESSAGEBOARD [ADD A NEW SUBJECT] [OVERVIEW & TUTORIAL]
Subject: what do I do?
Posted By oatcakekev on 02-09-2010
Hi all, I,m not sure how to go about starting my divorce proceedings. I was only married for literaly a few weeks when my 'wife' kicked me out. This was some time ago now but I have since been informed that she was having an ...

Subject: Section 13 Particulars
Posted By Im78 on 29-08-2010
Hi
I'm new here and currently completing the divorce petition. I'm really stuck as to what to say under section 13 (Particulars), in particular giving brief details of how the separation came about.
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-08-2010
As you are divorcing after five years separation a...
Added By Im78 on 29-08-2010
Thank you - does this also work for separating aft...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-08-2010
Yes, it works for two years separation although if...

Subject: AM I LIABLE TO PAY MAINTENANCE?
Posted By Rupert on 27-08-2010
Hello i would like advice please. My Son has recently contacted me after 11 years (long story but reluctantly and for the sake of my son I ceased contact due to circumstances beyond my control). The mother has never asked for...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 28-08-2010
How old is your son?
Added By Rupert on 28-08-2010
He's 15 in a few days.
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 28-08-2010
Contact and child support are treated separately u...
Added By Rupert on 28-08-2010
I understand. No problem paying- it just won't go ...

Subject: newly seperated
Posted By Charliegh on 19-08-2010
Hi. I have recently seperated from my husband of 10 years. Our marriage was always rocky to say the least and we both met after ending long intense relationships. Anyways, I had been feeling for many years that it wasn't rig...
Added By Stuart on 19-08-2010
Are you in the UK? I only ask because of your use ...
Added By Charliegh on 19-08-2010
Thank you for answering. I am in Canada, Ontario a...
Added By Charliegh on 19-08-2010
I didn't click the notify box on the previous mess...
Added By EnglishRose on 21-08-2010
You would probably be better with a Canadian not ...
Added By why? on 25-08-2010
spousal maintenance is not paid just to meet your ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 25-08-2010
In Canada the justice department issues guidelines...
Added By Charliegh on 26-08-2010
Thank you everyone for being so helpful

Subject: Hi. justfound out `wife ¬ has withdrawn large amount of cash from her bank accounts
Posted By koro on 14-08-2010
Hi, I have been very gratefull for the advice yo uguys have previously given me..
I have today `found` out that my wife has withdrawn nearly all the cash in what I believe to be her only 2 bank accounts. She w...
Added By why? on 14-08-2010
she should disclose this money in her form e. it s...
Added By koro on 14-08-2010
I guess i will keep quiet that I know then...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-08-2010
You are correct. There was a ruling recently that ...
Added By koro on 14-08-2010
She did, but the solicitor had warned her, that as...
Added By Stuart on 15-08-2010
Nice lady....
Added By Stuart on 16-08-2010
This new bit of legislation seems a tad unfair don...
Added By koro on 17-08-2010
I have booked in with a solicitor for the end of S...
Added By EnglishRose on 23-08-2010
It's not of course wrong to take your own money ou...
Added By Stuart on 24-08-2010
Im not sure you can disclose it later......

Subject: Hi. justfound out `wife ¬ has withdrawn large amount of cash from her bank accounts
Posted By koro on 14-08-2010
Hi, I have been very gratefull for the advice yo uguys have previously given me..
I have today `found` out that my wife has withdrawn nearly all the cash in what I believe to be her only 2 bank accounts. She w...
Added By Captain Oates on 19-08-2010
Disclosure should be full and frank, without break...
Added By EnglishRose on 21-08-2010
It's her money. If she needed to spend it that's f...

Subject: Is it just me? 2 items in one question
Posted By Kat007 on 14-08-2010
So my child returned home today, our turn to spend school holidays together. Child seemed a bit distant and not very pleased to be home put that down to lack of contact since school broke up, I how ever was excited and just c...
Added By why? on 14-08-2010
i think all you can do kat is kindly tell your son...
Added By Kat007 on 14-08-2010
that's ok Why? Ijust hate it when he has had 3 wee...
Added By Stuart on 16-08-2010
Kat, dont be troubled by all of this.

Subject: Well I am moving
Posted By Kat007 on 09-08-2010
Yep it's happening at last and I could not be happier, honestly I am so happy about leaving the FMH (on the actual day I will be a mess) but I know it is the real start to a new life for me and my children.
It'...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 09-08-2010
Good luck, Kat. Now finally you can start moving ...
Added By why? on 09-08-2010
good news kat. it will be nice to have a home that...

Subject: Mistakes we make
Posted By Pl on 05-08-2010
Been with my wife for 3.5 yrs and have a 2.5 yr old daughter. Since she met me I have always gone out got very drunk and continued to stay out until everywhere was closed. This has got much less frequent but caught up in the ...
Added By Stuart on 05-08-2010
Err, what do you expect???
The worl...
Added By why? on 07-08-2010
at least you recognise your problem and the effect...
Added By Stuart on 08-08-2010
I agree with Why?
I will say this P...
Added By Pl on 12-08-2010
thanks for the feedback. My wife has now moved out...
Added By Stuart on 18-08-2010
you seem to be answering your own questions. ...
Added By EnglishRose on 21-08-2010
You don't seem to haev been ideal husband adn she'...

Subject: My wife is trying to get me out of the house for`her safety`--what do I do
Posted By koro on 04-08-2010
Sorry it`s me again...
My wife is seeing her solicitor today, to try and get me out of our house as we divorce (nothing started yet). My 12 year ols son is adament that if I have to leave, then he is coming wi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-08-2010
You really need to see a solicitor urgently and it...
Added By koro on 04-08-2010
Thanks, I earn a good wage, just stupidly let my w...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-08-2010
The problem with taking your son with you is if it...
Added By koro on 04-08-2010
thankyou.....
Added By Stuart on 04-08-2010
Its starting.......
Has she actuall...
Added By Captain Oates on 04-08-2010
Pay your salary into an account in your name and t...
Added By koro on 04-08-2010
Thanks everyone....what a bloody nightmare. That m...

Subject: 12yr old son wishes to live with Father
Posted By koro on 31-07-2010
Hi, I have been married 13 years, have a 12 year old son. He means the world to me, my wife has a 21 and 19 year old daughters from a previous marriage. Unfortunately my wife is having an affair with her boss, I have seen the...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-08-2010
The wishes and feelings of 12 year olds carry cons...
Added By koro on 01-08-2010
Thankyou so very much n replying, to be honest I d...
Added By EnglishRose on 01-08-2010
Depends if it's bigger than reaosnable needs even ...
Added By Stuart on 02-08-2010
There is no reason why your son cant live with you...
Added By Captain Oates on 02-08-2010
I think Stuart is the most correct here. Whatever ...
Added By koro on 02-08-2010
Thankyou for replying, it helps so much having adv...
Added By Stuart on 02-08-2010
Koro, be very careful.
If your wife...
Added By EnglishRose on 02-08-2010
Even if you were female like me ( earned much more...
Added By koro on 02-08-2010
Phew, I`m 45, had around 5 years l...
Added By Stuart on 02-08-2010
Koro...
Its a bit obvious but all o...
Added By Kat007 on 03-08-2010
Hi Koro,
Please take Stuarts advice...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-08-2010
It's important to remember everyone's situation is...
Added By koro on 03-08-2010
Thankyou everyone for your help and advice, I am s...

Subject: Will I ever smile again?
Posted By sillymoo on 29-07-2010
Hi I'm new here. H left 8 weeks ago after a huge row (him screaming, me shaking as usual) Married for three and a half years, two beautiful children but the top and bottom of it is he's a bully. We met eight years ago when he...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 30-07-2010
Children are often bereft at the breakdown of thei...

Subject: Something interesting perhaps?
Posted By Stuart on 29-07-2010
Have a quick look at the link below.
Its going to have quite an effect for future settlements do you think?
Its not going to be lawful any longer to nick documents detailing the ex's hidden zillions to u...
Added By EnglishRose on 30-07-2010
The full judgment is a great read:-
www.bai...
Added By Stuart on 02-08-2010
I think most marriage breakups are of the latter t...
Added By EnglishRose on 02-08-2010
But if likem ost people you have one job with an e...

Subject: Something New
Posted By horrace198 on 26-07-2010
I have posted on this site before but got fed up with it as I had the impression that ED thought - no smoke without fire and that I made no sense.
I have been divorced for a while and have been unable to see my...
Added By Suvla1915 on 26-07-2010
Ah Horace, (CO?), as Sometimes it doesn't work has...
Added By horrace198 on 27-07-2010
Suvia
My divorce was 8 years ago. ...
Added By evr on 27-07-2010
What a load of old bollocks. Just because your ow...
Added By horrace198 on 27-07-2010
Evr. Bring it on please.....
Corre...
Added By evr on 27-07-2010
I can't really advise you horrace, but trying to p...
Added By Captain Oates on 27-07-2010
Wasn't me (honest), still I think my ex's father i...
Added By Captain Oates on 27-07-2010
My advice to Horrace is, try not to marry or have ...
Added By Captain Oates on 27-07-2010
For the first time, perhaps ever, I agree with evr...
Added By horrace198 on 28-07-2010
Evr - I dont intend to prove she is a psychopath. ...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
Ok, so your ex is a psychopath, as is my ex's fath...
Added By evr on 28-07-2010
Then I don't quite see the point of your posts, ap...
Added By horrace198 on 28-07-2010
EVR. Point of post. Took me 8 years to work out ...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
She just gave him carte blanche and took his money...
Added By horrace198 on 28-07-2010
Captain O. I am not stupid. I am a Chartered Accou...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
I am not interested in them and wrt what I am deal...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
No one talked to him at the wedding that was.
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
I am assuming you do not need me to explain what a...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
Last point, if we are getting really technical, I ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 28-07-2010
Was your shrink a psychologist by any chance? As s...
Added By Captain Oates on 29-07-2010
Stidw, you say not to generalise, then generalise....
Added By Captain Oates on 29-07-2010
Also, clinical psychologists do need to examine so...
Added By why? on 29-07-2010
IT doesn't really matterwhat you want to labe; a p...
Added By Stuart on 29-07-2010
"There are literally hundreds of reasons of why co...
Added By evr on 29-07-2010
Frequently just means often
Added By Captain Oates on 29-07-2010
I've never known it happen that nrp has not been w...
Added By Captain Oates on 29-07-2010
Please take out the word vindictive from that last...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 30-07-2010
"There are literally hundreds of reasons of why co...
Added By Captain Oates on 30-07-2010
That is hear say and comes from someone with a ves...
Added By Captain Oates on 30-07-2010
Actually is not hear say. But the courts really do...
Added By EnglishRose on 30-07-2010
How old are the children of the original poster?
Added By horrace198 on 04-08-2010
I am just one by one going through posts after my ...
Added By horrace198 on 04-08-2010
Sometimesitdoesn'twork. I agree with all all your...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-08-2010
The label doesn't matter.
If a mo...
Added By Captain Oates on 04-08-2010
One night in 14 if not agreed (default), otherwise...

Subject: BT's Adam and Jane
Posted By Captain Oates on 23-07-2010
Well, everyone can now vote on this, I think it's on if Adam and Jane stay together or not. To vote it's at
www.bt.com\vote
Personally I think it's a close run thing, but that they should split u...
Added By Kat007 on 25-07-2010
Ha ha,
She is going to say she's pr...
Added By Captain Oates on 27-07-2010
Lol, I like that Kat, well thought out, you have a...
Added By Kat007 on 30-07-2010
ha ha excellent CO,
Jane is having ...
Added By Captain Oates on 30-07-2010
Lol, can't beat that, especially like the harrassm...
Added By Kat007 on 02-08-2010
LOL, CO.
I try my best maybe that b...

Subject: private investigator
Posted By sad lisa on 20-07-2010
Guys, I need help. I am at the very beginning of a separation. He initiated it but is now changing his mind on a daily basis and won't move out. One day he doesn't love me, the next he does. Terrible mind games. But I am 99% ...
Added By Jellylegs on 21-07-2010
Yes Lisa, I have, and I have sent you 2 replies, b...
Added By Jellylegs on 21-07-2010
Yes Lisa, I have, and I have sent you 2 replies, b...
Added By sad lisa on 21-07-2010
Thanks for your response Jellylegs
...
Added By Stuart on 21-07-2010
Why bother?
If you're at the point of throw...
Added By sad lisa on 21-07-2010
You've got a point Stuart. After my initial chats ...
Added By Stuart on 21-07-2010
Hi,
Fair point about the lilving ar...
Added By Captain Oates on 23-07-2010
I think you should try going to councelling togeth...
Added By why? on 24-07-2010
to be honest. if you feel his behaviour is strange...
Added By Suzy on 25-07-2010
I am with Stuart on this one - why bother with a P...
Added By Suvla1915 on 26-07-2010
No don't bother with a PI.
The way ...
Added By Jellylegs on 28-07-2010
Hi Lisa
5 years ago now, but I had a real ...
Added By sad lisa on 28-07-2010
Thank you to everybody for your thoughtful advice....

Subject: Ex Has Remarried Someone Children Have Never Met
Posted By Caroline on 15-07-2010
Children are 18 and 14 and go to him every other weekend if he's available. Last weekend they went and he announced that he got married a month ago to someone they've never heard of let alone met.
Youngest is ...
Added By why? on 15-07-2010
my advise would be to sit with your children and a...
Added By Caroline on 15-07-2010
Why - thanks for your v prompt and v helpful advic...
Added By why? on 17-07-2010
if he did introduce the children to previous relat...
Added By Suzy on 17-07-2010
Do you think your ex got married in a rush and is ...
Added By Caroline on 18-07-2010
I have no idea why he played his hand the way he d...
Added By Caroline on 18-07-2010
14 year old is now saying he's not sure he wants t...
Added By why? on 19-07-2010
i dont see why you would need to do it at all thro...
Added By Stuart on 19-07-2010
"I really don't want them growing up thinking this...
Added By Teadrinker on 20-07-2010
Weird situation. Maybe you could encourage them to...
Added By Owl1 on 20-07-2010
"Whilst some people do have whirlwind romances and...
Added By evr on 20-07-2010
I think you're missing the point Stuart.
Added By Caroline on 20-07-2010
Thanks all. Yes to the loss of respect. And yes t...
Added By why? on 20-07-2010
yes.stuart. i dont get your point about the ex not...

Subject: Ex Marital home
Posted By jasi on 15-07-2010
hi guys.
I have been divorced for two years. I am still in the marital home after someone did a runner leaving me with it all to deal with. We had an agreement between us about the 2nd party relinquising rights & claim...
Added By why? on 15-07-2010
i dont know what an IVA is. However, would be best...

Subject: Advice 3 years on please
Posted By Alan11 on 13-07-2010
Seperated for over 3 years and recently divorced. 2 boys aged 5 and 8 which we shared equally 50/50 for over 3 years. We have an approved seperation agreemant submitted to the court detailing the equal sharing agreement. kids...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
Alan, I am sorry no one else has been able to answ...
Added By Captain Oates on 28-07-2010
During war men were not able to see their children...

Subject: Cant move on
Posted By stuckinarutt on 13-07-2010
43 years old, 2 kids, together on and off for 22 years
currently seperated from my wife and kids and it hurts like hell.
met when we where both young and it was sometimes up and down but had some good times.
Added By Stuart on 14-07-2010
My advice is to give her space. Id not usually adv...

Subject: What woud I need to do to prove harassment?
Posted By Kat007 on 11-07-2010
For the last few weeks I have been harassed and given so much stress I have wanted to just walk away from life. It was only a good friend of mine who happened upon a tearful Kat who gave me some strength to carry on.
<...
Added By why? on 11-07-2010
kat.
there is no doubt that thgis i...
Added By Owl1 on 12-07-2010
Kat I am not sure what you need to initiate a Harr...
Added By Kat007 on 12-07-2010
Thanks Why x
Hi Owl,
...
Added By Stuart on 12-07-2010
What are the emails etc in relation to?
If ...
Added By Owl1 on 12-07-2010
Good to hear you are feeling more positive Kat.
Added By Kat007 on 13-07-2010
Hi Stuart,
The e-mails where about ...
Added By Owl1 on 13-07-2010
Kat if you are not going to answer the emails then...
Added By why? on 13-07-2010
kat.
i remember when i was going th...
Added By Stuart on 14-07-2010
Thing is tho Why? is that you did not have to put ...
Added By Kat007 on 14-07-2010
Don't worry it is continuing and I have ignored hi...
Added By jasi on 15-07-2010
Kat
I agree with Owl1 comments on involving...
Added By why? on 15-07-2010
personally i think involving the police would make...
Added By Stuart on 16-07-2010
Why? What do you mean by making matters worse?
Added By jasi on 16-07-2010
How could it possibly worse than it already is?
Added By Kat007 on 16-07-2010
Well thanks guys again.
I do keep e...
Added By why? on 19-07-2010
hi stuart.
appreciate your point ab...
Added By Stuart on 19-07-2010
"I will seek advice from my new bestest friend Mr ...
Added By Kat007 on 20-07-2010
NO not get involved at all Stuart just ask whether...
Added By Stuart on 20-07-2010
Kat, if your policeman friend has told you that th...
Added By Kat007 on 25-07-2010
Hi Stuart,
I get what your saying a...

Subject: International Contact Question
Posted By Simes 2p on 07-07-2010
Stidsy, I have lost your email, or you have changed it because the address I use doesn't get a response.
Owl, I have never had your email address, and adverts in the Stoke Gazette haven't produced it either.
Added By Owl1 on 13-07-2010
Simes , greetings from Stoke and congratulations o...
Added By Simes 2p on 13-07-2010
Owl,
Thanks for the comments. I ha...
Added By Stuart on 14-07-2010
Hi Simes....congrats etc...
Yes, I ...
Added By Kat007 on 17-07-2010
Hi Simes 2p,
Huge congratulations t...
Added By Captain Oates on 23-07-2010
Congratulations Simes, very well done.

Subject: schools..decisons decisons
Posted By sophiecat on 07-07-2010
Just wondering if anyone has any experience or words of wisdom to add to this dilemma..
Bit of background, divorced 2yrs now, finances sorted, house sold (just..). Just starting to get to an amicable stage but things s...
Added By Fedup2007 on 10-07-2010
I think one thing to do is make a list of pros and...

Subject: kids going away
Posted By keephappy1 on 04-07-2010
Will get straight to point, ex getting remarried this year.
What is bothering me is wedding is in the states and he wants to take our 2 chilren g7 and b4 with him, he has had them once overnight in january and...
Added By Teadrinker on 05-07-2010
Maybe you should talk to your ex first and ask him...
Added By keephappy1 on 05-07-2010
He wants to take them for 16 days.
...
Added By Suzy on 05-07-2010
A really random suggestion.
Don't shoot me....
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 06-07-2010
Is this during the school holiday? If not, would ...
Added By keephappy1 on 06-07-2010
Suzy,
I laughed with the kids and said tha...
Added By Stuart on 06-07-2010
Right...
Firstly I think you have g...
Added By Kat007 on 06-07-2010
Keephappy1,
I am pleased your ok ab...
Added By Suzy on 06-07-2010
Stuart - I wasn't suggeting that she attend the we...
Added By Kat007 on 07-07-2010
Suzy,
I don't think I would want my...
Added By Stuart on 07-07-2010
Until you hear from Mr Happy then I'd forget about...
Added By why? on 08-07-2010
i think you are wrong on that one stuart. the chil...
Added By Stuart on 09-07-2010
There we go again..............
Dad...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 10-07-2010
Actually unless there is a residence order (or sha...

Subject: How to end a relationship
Posted By lost girl on 04-07-2010
Hi,
New to all of this, splitting up, possible divorce, this site.
In desperate turmoil. Been together for over 12 years, married for 2 of them and with 2 young boys. Relationship is not a happy one wi...
Added By Stuart on 06-07-2010
Hi.
Im not really sure how we can h...
Added By lost girl on 06-07-2010
Thanks Stuart. Interesting comment - i think that...
Added By sad lisa on 07-07-2010
Hi LG
I just joined the site for th...
Added By lost girl on 13-07-2010
Hi Lisa,
When I ask myself the same...
Added By sad lisa on 20-07-2010
Hi Lost Girl
Sorry for late respons...
Added By lost girl on 21-07-2010
Hey Lisa, thanks again for your response. can you...
Added By sad lisa on 21-07-2010
I was going to ask you the same thing but didn't w...

Subject: What's Been Going On Behind Your Back!-- E Snoopz
Posted By crckn18 on 01-07-2010
ESnoopz:- Email Surveillance Experts---Email Cracking Giants..The Snooping People.
E Snoopz: CrackAOL, CrackHOTMAIL, CrackYAHOO, Crack GMAIL!!
Want to hack, crack someone's Yahoo!, Hotmai...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-07-2010
For anyone reading this it is a criminal offence i...
Added By Stuart on 02-07-2010
Its the same ol sleazebags at work....wish the sit...

Subject: Just devastated and can't move on....
Posted By cupranod on 29-06-2010
Hi all,I have just joined the board and ama 43 years old man who is separated from his wife and 3 year old son,with divorce proceedings continuing apace.
I have suffered with depression severely in the last few years,...
Added By Owl1 on 30-06-2010
How do you start to move on??
Well ...
Added By why? on 04-07-2010
also. remember, this man couldindeed just be a fri...

Subject: with out predudice save as to costs
Posted By tiger on 25-06-2010
I have received a letter from ex sol and at the top it says:
with out predudice save as to costs
what does this mean? I am acting in person, so sould I state the same in any letters i send to e...
Added By tiger on 28-06-2010
anyone????
Added By Owl1 on 29-06-2010
It means that the letter cannot be used as evidenc...

Subject: My case has been mishandled, to whom do I turn?
Posted By ABCD123 on 20-06-2010
Divorcing a litigant-happy self-representing narcissist is not easy, take that from me after 6 years in divorce court and the divorce is not over. There is an amazing non-fiction book in that, which will make lawyers redunda...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 20-06-2010
I wish I had a pound for every divorcing spouse wh...
Added By ABCD123 on 20-06-2010
Thanks for your reply. I appreciate it and I will...
Added By Stuart on 21-06-2010
Im not really sure of what you are asking.....
Added By why? on 21-06-2010
personally i have found the court have not done mu...

Subject: Quick Clean Break question
Posted By MrNoOne on 15-06-2010
back ground info here http://www.ondivorce.co.uk/messageboard/mb-index.php?mb_id=1&subject_id=9161. We have a 4.5 year son.
We both agreed the consent order but her sol is saying to put a nominal £1 order as ...
Added By MrNoOne on 15-06-2010
I know i cannot get a clean break from my child wh...
Added By MrNoOne on 15-06-2010
i think it's all be sorted now.
The...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 16-06-2010
There are some local differences and in some place...
Added By MrNoOne on 17-06-2010
Does this make sense:
The respondan...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-06-2010
Surely that should say something along the lines t...
Added By MrNoOne on 18-06-2010
My sol is to change from respondant to petitioner ...
Added By EnglishRose on 18-06-2010
Why is the child maintenance so low though? It's a...
Added By MrNoOne on 18-06-2010
This is a nominal amount i would have to pay on to...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-06-2010
Is this to avoid a nominal order for SM? It's rath...
Added By MrNoOne on 19-06-2010
The order has been signed an sent to the court. Wi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-06-2010
When negotiating a consent order it is often nece...

Subject: trying to get access with no legal help
Posted By taz10 on 15-06-2010
Hi All,
I am new on here, and looking for some advice on behalf of my other half. He is trying to get sensible contact sorted out with his son who she has not let him see for over a year (long story, but he has...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 16-06-2010
He can apply for both at the same time.

Subject: Advice - CAFCASS and agreement outside
Posted By Jools123 on 13-06-2010
Hi all,
Its been a while. On the whole things have been going pretty well.
Applied to court in Jan and had hearing in Feb for increased contact. Deferrred to CAFCASS because daughter is only 4 yrs old an...

Subject: Do you think your significant is straying??[ESNOOP ZONE]
Posted By crckn18 on 13-06-2010
E Snoop Zone: Email Surveillance Services..
For all those people who want to find out if your partner is cheating or the password to your partner’s Yahoo!/GMail/msn/AOL and other. Or if you are a pare...
Added By Stuart on 13-06-2010
Forget selling your dodgy underhand crap in the uk...

Subject: Not Nice really
Posted By Kat007 on 09-06-2010
So been and done the deed today,
Son's request has been approved sort of, the judge will not sign until all issues have been dealt with namely the holiday contact.
So it stands that I will see so...
Added By Owl1 on 12-06-2010
Hi Kat
At least you have some clari...
Added By Jellylegs on 12-06-2010
Hello Kat
Long time since I posted , but I ...
Added By EnglishRose on 13-06-2010
Well done JL and also I h ave older children too a...
Added By Kat007 on 14-06-2010
cheers guy's,
Took the weekend away...
Added By why? on 14-06-2010
hi kat.
surely if your ex is only h...
Added By Kat007 on 14-06-2010
It doesn't work like that Why?, the CB office will...
Added By why? on 16-06-2010
if you are no longer entitled to ctc then this is ...
Added By Kat007 on 17-06-2010
Hi Why?,
Ctc is paid the the main c...
Added By why? on 20-06-2010
hi kat.
i appreciate that you are b...
Added By Owl1 on 21-06-2010
Why, what you are suggesting to Kat is benefit fra...
Added By Stuart on 21-06-2010
Tut tut Why? Naughty girl!
Owl is q...
Added By why? on 21-06-2010
hee hee hee.....
i just knew that w...
Added By Owl1 on 22-06-2010
Why, I did read your post, you suggested to Kat th...
Added By Kat007 on 22-06-2010
Commit fraud ha ha, not me no way lol

Subject: the law on contact?
Posted By why? on 08-06-2010
hello all.
i continue to have real problems with contact arrangements. h continues to let us down at the last minute by saying he cant come to fetch the children and doesn't always give a reason. when he does g...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 09-06-2010
From a legal POV either parent can apply for an or...
Added By why? on 09-06-2010
hi sometimes.
i agree on the whole court th...
Added By why? on 09-06-2010
in fact stidw. the contact is NOT in place to give...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 10-06-2010
Agreed, it is unreasonable but contact is dealt wi...
Added By why? on 14-06-2010
yes. i had thought that too with regard the babysi...
Added By Stuart on 15-06-2010
"What children need is for at least one parent to ...
Added By why? on 15-06-2010
yes stuart. ok. however, i dont consider these to ...
Added By Owl1 on 16-06-2010
Why I totally agree with what Stuart is saying.
Added By why? on 16-06-2010
owl. i dont see how you can say that i should not ...
Added By why? on 16-06-2010
owl. sorry, its me again.
i just want to ma...
Added By Owl1 on 16-06-2010
Why you can blame your husband all you like for ho...
Added By why? on 16-06-2010
once again owl, how does a person put child care i...
Added By Stuart on 16-06-2010
Ok Why?, I understand exactly what you are feeling...
Added By why? on 16-06-2010
hello stuart.
firstly i disagree th...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-06-2010
There is no point in inventing laws which don't ex...
Added By why? on 17-06-2010
here'show i see it. i might be abkle to change the...
Added By Stuart on 18-06-2010
Yes you can do all of that.
Of course, when...
Added By why? on 18-06-2010
there is no arguing or fighting in front of the ch...
Added By Stuart on 19-06-2010
All seems so trivial really.
Is it ...
Added By why? on 20-06-2010
as i said stuart. there is no bickering between us...
Added By Stuart on 21-06-2010
Aha....but that there is always an angle on what w...
Added By Stuart on 21-06-2010
Sorry, that should have read "if it wasnt for peop...
Added By why? on 21-06-2010
hi stuart.
iapologise if i sounded ...

Subject: Ex to be has offered to buy me out
Posted By dts on 04-06-2010
Hi,
The ex to be has offered to buy me out but not in the way I would have expected. She has said that she will pay off all our joint debts (approx £18K) and give me a small lump sum (£2K), if I am prepared t...
Added By EnglishRose on 04-06-2010
1. What is the difference legally between my name ...
Added By dts on 08-06-2010
Many thanks English Rose for such a clear and comp...
Added By dts on 10-06-2010
Had another thought. As it is a member of her her ...

Subject: accepted his offer
Posted By why? on 03-06-2010
been informed that although all that i have been saying about h has been proved with the last minute findings we can not be certain that these findings are actual proof of further income or divertion of income and numerous ot...
Added By Stuart on 04-06-2010
Well done. Thank goodness its nearly all over and ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 05-06-2010
Well done. That's a major hurdle over. Settlements...
Added By why? on 05-06-2010
yes i am expecting this to drag on with details in...

Subject: feeling devastated
Posted By drfeelgood on 03-06-2010
Found out 2 weeks ago that my wife of 15 years was having an affair and it has totally destroyed me. Things were not too good due to some house / financial difficulties and i guess i didnt show much affection. i have a 14 yea...
Added By why? on 03-06-2010
is your wife still having the affair and if not ar...
Added By drfeelgood on 03-06-2010
Thanks for the reply, it really helps. i suppose i...
Added By why? on 04-06-2010
i appreciate the pain and 'grief' as you say. it i...
Added By drfeelgood on 04-06-2010
Thanks for your kind words.I suppose i need to jus...
Added By Devastated on 08-06-2010
Hi there, I really feel for you and know exactly h...

Subject: ??
Posted By tiger on 30-05-2010
If I knew my ex was committing benefit fraud and I was to report it - what implications would this have on any final settlement figure? Would a judge order for more to be paid in view that the benefits have reduced or a judge...
Added By Stuart on 31-05-2010
Sorry to disapoint but you arent going to be able ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 02-06-2010
Would it reduce the settlement figure ? Any financ...

Subject: serving papers
Posted By tigtogs on 30-05-2010
I am in the process of divorce but he wont acknowledge the court papers. I have tried to have them served on him but i am not confident they will succeed. We are both in new relationships but he just wants to make things as ...
Added By Stuart on 31-05-2010
I thought that simply posting them was sufficient ...
Added By why? on 31-05-2010
i guess it depends on how long long you have been ...
Added By Stuart on 01-06-2010
Mine werent.
I posted mine.
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 02-06-2010
It's fine posting papers if the respondent acknowl...
Added By tigtogs on 05-06-2010
And what happens if he refuses to be served , whic...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 05-06-2010
Sorry I didn't word the post above clearly. When t...

Subject: Unreasonable Behaviour - examples
Posted By ILO on 29-05-2010
Good day,
Does anybody here have experience of supplying a list of items classed as "Unreasonable Behaviour"?
I was hoping some of you might share some examples of what you have used or recieved?
...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-05-2010
It's counter-productive getting into protracted ar...
Added By EnglishRose on 31-05-2010
And just about any happy marriage in the UK you ca...

Subject: Shall I just give in and not see my child
Posted By Kat007 on 27-05-2010
So not been on a while and hope everyone is ok and keeping well, Just needing to jot this down and hopefully have at least one shoulder for support as not much going on here right now.
Last court hearing was no...
Added By Devastated on 27-05-2010
Hi Kat007, I'm pretty new on here and have not off...
Added By Kat007 on 28-05-2010
hi devastated,
Sorry you're here to...
Added By Stuart on 28-05-2010
Hey Hey Kat.......
Its not easy I k...
Added By Owl1 on 29-05-2010
Kat so what you are saying is that Cafcass have co...
Added By why? on 29-05-2010
hi kat.
i was thinking about you re...
Added By why? on 29-05-2010
hi kat.
i was thinking about you re...
Added By Kat007 on 29-05-2010
Hi guy's,
Yes child is old enough f...
Added By why? on 30-05-2010
good for you kat. all the best.
Added By EnglishRose on 31-05-2010
And in most cases with teenagers they reach a stag...
Added By Owl1 on 01-06-2010
I tend to agree with ER, Court Orders are not real...
Added By Kat007 on 03-06-2010
My child who maybe a teenager has been asked by da...
Added By why? on 03-06-2010
kat this is awful for you and i cant imagine how y...
Added By Kat007 on 06-06-2010
So have got the info needed from the court house a...
Added By Owl1 on 07-06-2010
Hmm "I have been asked to write to you Judge ****...
Added By Kat007 on 07-06-2010
Thanks so much owl for the reply,
M...
Added By Owl1 on 08-06-2010
Kat, I think all you can do is ask your son how HE...
Added By Owl1 on 08-06-2010
Kat I should also add that your son may not want t...
Added By Kat007 on 09-06-2010
Ow it is so nice you have taken the time to make t...
Added By why? on 10-06-2010
yip. cant you just say that you are willing to hav...

Subject: DIY
Posted By Andy1972 on 26-05-2010
Hi All...i am filling in the divorce petition by myself and handing it into the courts. My ex wife has consented to the divorce and i'll be applying for it under the "lived apart for at least 2 years and the respondent conse...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-05-2010
In cases of consensual separation the conventional...
Added By Andy1972 on 27-05-2010
Thanks "sometimesitdoesn'twork". This information...

Subject: Early days!
Posted By Devastated on 23-05-2010
It is 3 weeks tomorrow since my husband announced he is leaving me....he's been having an affair and it's love! We have 2 kids, a son 8 and daughter 4. He has been a very caring and loving husband and has a fantastic relatio...
Added By Stuart on 25-05-2010
Has he given you a date for when he is going?
Added By Devastated on 25-05-2010
Hi Stuart, thanks for replying...No firm date yet ...
Added By Stuart on 26-05-2010
I think you need to see a solicitor to explore all...
Added By Devastated on 29-05-2010
Hi, I Have been to solicitors for an initial fact ...

Subject: What If One Partner Want A Divorce But The Other Doesn't?
Posted By Holmes66 on 21-05-2010
Under UK law, If a married woman has an affair, then wants a divorce, but her husband doesn't, how do things proceed legally?
Many thanks
Added By Teadrinker on 21-05-2010
The person who wants the divorce can still get a d...
Added By Simes 2p on 24-05-2010
You can't get a divorce on your own adultery, and ...
Added By JohnR on 26-05-2010
If one party does not want a divorce and is prepar...

Subject: confusion
Posted By gses3 on 20-05-2010
Hi this is my first chat me and my husband have been married for 13 yrs young love i guess. we have 4 children together we had our ups and downs in the relationship. this past november he told me he wanted out wasn't expectin...
Added By optimistic one on 20-05-2010
This is a terrible and sad situation for you, you ...
Added By Stuart on 20-05-2010
Unfortunately unless you can convince him otherwis...

Subject: acceptance
Posted By optimistic one on 18-05-2010
I am new to all this, my relationship with my husband deteriorated since the christmas period, not stop arguing no intimancy, affection etc. My Husband has always used alcohol as a way of coping which makes the tensions worse...
Added By why? on 18-05-2010
hello.
it is unfortunately a horrid horrid...
Added By optimistic one on 20-05-2010
Hi thanks, everything you say is true, i need to g...

Subject: Help!
Posted By magi21 on 17-05-2010
Please help, I need some place to express how I feel. My exH has booked a holiday for himself/girlfriend and our daughter 161/2. D has a boyfriend who she has known for 6 months. because of exams they do not see much of each ...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
I'm puzzled about how your ex can book a holiday a...
Added By magi21 on 17-05-2010
It's a hotel so they will not be together in the s...
Added By Stuart on 17-05-2010
Pardon me for saying this but dont you think you a...
Added By EnglishRose on 17-05-2010
Most fathers are nothing like he is. Ih ave taken...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
The idea of going on holiday with dad, knowing tha...
Added By Stuart on 17-05-2010
" would have liked her to have a father who wanted...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
"Do you really believe that your ex husband is enc...
Added By Stuart on 17-05-2010
"The idea of going on holiday with dad, knowing th...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
Stuart, she's just 16 and it's a new relationship....
Added By Stuart on 17-05-2010
Lol...
Parental involvement TD? Or ...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
"FFS....who says the girl is going to have sex????...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
No, I meant parental involvement!
Added By Stuart on 17-05-2010
Oh I see.....
So it really is a cas...
Added By magi21 on 17-05-2010
Stuart. I am not put out that D is going on hols w...
Added By Teadrinker on 17-05-2010
"Personally I'd rather believe my daughter and if ...
Added By magi21 on 18-05-2010
TD, I did put the suggestion forward that 2 rooms ...
Added By Teadrinker on 18-05-2010
The only alternative I can think of with him havin...
Added By Teadrinker on 18-05-2010
Or the bf could agree to pay for another room.
Added By magi21 on 18-05-2010
They are both keen to go and want to share a room ...
Added By magi21 on 18-05-2010
Changing the subject slightly, D just happened to ...
Added By Stuart on 18-05-2010
I have the same situation insofar as my ex and her...
Added By magi21 on 18-05-2010
Yes to a degree she does make arrangements for con...
Added By Stuart on 18-05-2010
Well, Im afraid thats just the way some ex spouses...
Added By magi21 on 18-05-2010
Oh yes they do! D and her girlfriends have 'chat-o...
Added By Teadrinker on 18-05-2010
LOL at 'chat-overs'!
My ex's favour...
Added By why? on 19-05-2010
hello.
it all seems pretty straight...
Added By magi21 on 19-05-2010
I have made it plain what my opinion is on the mat...
Added By Stuart on 19-05-2010
Why? You are talking nonsense....
...
Added By magi21 on 20-05-2010
As it happens Stuart until age 18 they are classed...
Added By Stuart on 20-05-2010
Whether I have a teenage daughter or not is irrele...
Added By Teadrinker on 21-05-2010
"Facing reality" would be appropriate if she was i...
Added By Stuart on 21-05-2010
"But what Magi's ex is doing is trying to push the...
Added By Teadrinker on 21-05-2010
Why is it outrageous and silly? Yes, many teenager...
Added By Stuart on 21-05-2010
Sorry....getting bored with this.....
Added By why? on 26-05-2010
yip. as everyone has repeated. the girl is NOT hav...
Added By Stuart on 27-05-2010
Err....put your specs on Why?......
Where h...
Added By why? on 29-05-2010
stuart. you said the fatherwas facing reality, goi...
Added By Stuart on 31-05-2010
The father is facing reality that its very likely ...
Added By why? on 31-05-2010
ok. i guess we are not going to agree on this. i j...

Subject: Ex won't pay
Posted By george76 on 16-05-2010
I have been seperated from my husband for 18 months and we have 2 children. He has recently stopped paying towards a secured loan on the property I am living in with our children. The house is up for sale and although I am ma...
Added By EnglishRose on 17-05-2010
If he earns more than you do you may be entitled t...
Added By george76 on 17-05-2010
He does earn more than me and I already work full ...

Subject: hurts so much devastated
Posted By raymca on 14-05-2010
I have found out this week that my wife is having an affair I am totally devastated, have been drunk for 3 days. the look on my sons face , 16 yrs old, when I went to pack to leave ripped me apart. I cannot leave my kids but ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-05-2010
Hang on in there, although it hurts right now ther...
Added By raymca on 16-05-2010
I asked my wife to leave the family home tonight w...
Added By Stuart on 18-05-2010
Hi...
Firstly Im sorry that this ha...

Subject: Legal advice can't be true.....can it??
Posted By Cullers on 10-05-2010
Need some advice pleeez!
About 18 months ago, I discovered my wife was having an affair. I confronted her and she said it was over on three separate occasions. Finally, I suspected she was actually away with her love...
Added By evr on 10-05-2010
What you can do is agree to the divorce but disagr...

Subject: I m ready to go
Posted By An American in London on 09-05-2010
I have asked H to leave for years but he refuses to leave the (3) kids. We have stayed in the same house for years now, for the sake of the kids. Relationship is getting worse and fight at least once a week. I am fed up. ...
Added By evr on 09-05-2010
Its a big step to leave your children, and probabl...
Added By why? on 10-05-2010
hi.
it sounds like your children ar...

Subject: act in person
Posted By tiger on 06-05-2010
can anyone please provide guidance on acting in person when sorting out post divorce finances. I have had a first directions hearing and Judge ordered that he wants us to come back for an additional first directions hearing. ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 06-05-2010
Yes, that's possible. The actual divorce isn't too...
Added By tiger on 06-05-2010
So can I act in person and complete all administra...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 06-05-2010
Sorry, I'm not sure what happened to the last sent...
Added By tiger on 10-05-2010
Thanks sometimesitdoesn'twork. Any other tips for ...

Subject: Are online divorce advice websites useful?
Posted By Nitsolova on 03-05-2010
Hello,
My name is Kristina and I am a student conducting research on the effectiveness of divorce advice and support websites.
I am interested in finding out how useful such websites are to those contemplating ...

Subject: Divorce after 14 years separation
Posted By Luqa on 03-05-2010
Hi,
My partner has started divorce proceedings against his wife after 14 years of separation. They had no children together, and separated 3 years after marrying. She lives with her parents, has no dependents, and ha...
Added By evr on 04-05-2010
why on earth didn't he divorce her when they separ...

Subject: Help please - seperated and dont know what to do re house etc..
Posted By candlelight on 27-04-2010
Hi, Im new here so thanks for reading. Im married, my husband has left me and we have one child age 7. I am currently still in the marital home which is on a mortgage in joint names. Husband continuing to pay mortgage and bi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-04-2010
Bit short of time just now but there is no point i...
Added By why? on 29-04-2010
YES. Bsically, all the savings, equity and other a...
Added By Stuart on 29-04-2010
As explained above, all assets and cash go into th...
Added By EnglishRose on 29-04-2010
The answer here is stay put and get a full time jo...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-04-2010
The usual legal advice to both parties is to stay ...
Added By candlelight on 29-04-2010
thanks for everyones input, I will go see the soli...
Added By Stuart on 30-04-2010
"I dont want him in a grotty bedsit just cos I got...
Added By Stuart on 30-04-2010
Just a question to ER......
How wil...
Added By why? on 04-05-2010
and lets not forget the umpteen number of weeks ho...

Subject: frustrated
Posted By Jenjo on 25-04-2010
I'm new to this but I need some advice. I have been divorced for 10 years. My husband had cheated and left me for the other women. I still love him after all the time, we were together for 11 years. The problem is he has ...
Added By evr on 25-04-2010
I think you do know how to move on with your life,...
Added By why? on 25-04-2010
basically, your husband didn't leave you for the o...

Subject: Your help is needed
Posted By Lookingforhelp on 13-04-2010
Your experiences are valuable to someone else. Your experiences can help others who will walk through the traumatic experience of divorce. We are looking for your stories and your advice. We are doing research with regards to...

Subject: My ex has left his pets here and it's driving me nutts
Posted By wilfmother on 12-04-2010
My ex left last October, after starting an affair with a girl 17 years younger than him, an affair that he is deying although he is still with her and flaunting it all over facebook etc.
When he left he took basics, cl...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-04-2010
An animal can be property- and therefore subject t...
Added By wilfmother on 13-04-2010
Gosh, I know, I don't want the fish, they belong t...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-04-2010
'he seems to want to make everything as difficult ...
Added By Stuart on 13-04-2010
What do you mean he refuses to accept a petition f...
Added By Owl1 on 14-04-2010
Wilfmother, give the fish away to someone who will...
Added By why? on 14-04-2010
i agree with owls advice on fish. they are not you...

Subject: job
Posted By tiger on 10-04-2010
I am in middle of sorting finances at the moment.
I am very worried that I am going to loose my job due to poor performance and poor sick record. Will the judge penalise me for this in financial settlement?
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 11-04-2010
Unless the judge concludes someone has given up wo...
Added By tiger on 13-04-2010
ok - if i have lost my job then is it most likely...
Added By Stuart on 13-04-2010
I guess it depends on your earning potential....

Subject: update
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 10-04-2010
First hello all... I havent posted for sometime now, but have been watching!
Anyway...
Went to court to attach an enforcement order due to Darth X stopping contact over the Xmas period... bad gir...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 10-04-2010
Yes, when you apply for a warning notice to be att...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 10-04-2010
well- it didnt last long - she put the phone down ...

Subject: Marital Support
Posted By ngliving on 03-04-2010
Any ideas as to the level of support I may have to pay Ex W? 7 yr marriage, no kids. Ex-wife chose to work part time, now wants marital support. Been separated for 2 years decree absolute ready and waiting to collect. My posi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 07-04-2010
No one can possibly answer your question without d...

Subject: Discovered Cheating This Morning
Posted By alliechase on 03-04-2010
I left my phone at work and needed to call and cancel the plumber (how mundane is this?!). I borrowed my husband's cell. I'm greeted by nude screen pic. No panic yet, he reads Playboy, OK. A woman's name pops up with text...
Added By Neeta on 01-04-2010
Hi alliechase. I'm so sorry to hear what you are g...
Added By why? on 02-04-2010
i would also say that although there are situation...

Subject: OMG 1st April already
Posted By Kat007 on 01-04-2010
Although I don't condone violence at all just has to be done.
PINCH PUNCH FIRST DAY OF THE MONTH. :)
And hopefully spring is finally here, sunny day kids off school and CSA caught up with the ex ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-04-2010
Good to hear from you. How are the house selling a...
Added By Kat007 on 02-04-2010
Hi Stids,
God to hear from you too...
Added By why? on 02-04-2010
good for you kat. keep going. whats the business v...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-04-2010
Kat- I always thought it was 'PINCH punch -take yo...

Subject: Detecting A Cheating Husband!!
Posted By vporkz on 22-03-2010
E Snoop Zone: Email Surveillance Services...
For all those people who want to find out if your partner is cheating or the password to your partner’s Yahoo!/Gmail/msn/AOL and other. Or if you are a pa...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 22-03-2010
Grr.. for the umpteenth time it is a criminal offe...
Added By Kat007 on 25-03-2010
This is so annoying and as stids says criminal bes...
Added By Stuart on 25-03-2010
All very valid ones Kat especially the hiding the ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-04-2010
lol... 'Time to check up on your employees surfing...

Subject: Financial Settlement
Posted By david1972 on 20-03-2010
Hello Everyone,
I am looking for some advice. I have my decree nisi and need to reach financial settlement before obtaining absolute. I am near to getting a residency order in my favour, and once I have this I...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 21-03-2010
If you cannot come to a settlement between yourse...
Added By david1972 on 21-03-2010
The reason my ex is in the former marital home is ...
Added By EnglishRose on 21-03-2010
You might indeed and by the way there is nothing t...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 21-03-2010
I think you need to be careful here. Assets are sp...
Added By david1972 on 22-03-2010
I am sorry, when I said force her out of the house...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 22-03-2010
I realised you didn't mean literally force your wi...
Added By Stuart on 25-03-2010
All seems very unfair and just a tad sexist really...
Added By EnglishRose on 26-03-2010
May be she and her boyfriend could remortgage the ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-03-2010
The law doesn't discriminate, it treats people in ...
Added By david1972 on 26-03-2010
Thank you for your input. The problem I may have ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-03-2010
What an awful situation. If you don't want to live...

Subject: Divorced? Local High Street Firm v City Firm
Posted By r_elise on 17-03-2010
Hi, I am reposting this again to collect some more opinions. I am conducting some research with regards to how people choose their law firm in a divorce. So to those people who have been through a divorce or are going through...
Added By EnglishRose on 20-03-2010
I used Withers and he had another firm, but just i...

Subject: Feel Sad!
Posted By Neeta on 15-03-2010
It's been a while since I posted. My husband cheated on me about a year ago and initially I left him, moved away, got a new job..... but then he wanted to try again so we got back together. We spent the last six months togeth...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-03-2010
Sorry you find yourself here again and to hear of ...
Added By Kat007 on 17-03-2010
Hi Neeta,
Sorry you are back here a...
Added By Stuart on 17-03-2010
Hi Neeta....
Like STIDW and Kat Im ...
Added By Neeta on 19-03-2010
Many thanks for all the kind words...it makes such...

Subject: bizarre
Posted By why? on 14-03-2010
yesterday i received a text from h whislt children staying athis houseasking me if i would swap going to my daughters school lunch so he could take his girlfriend instead. can you celieve it? i have never been able to attend ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-03-2010
Why not just say no?
Added By why? on 14-03-2010
i assume you are referring in respponse to his que...
Added By Simes 2p on 15-03-2010
Stidsy, that was funny. After that massive rant, ...
Added By why? on 18-03-2010
looks like you didnt read my post.
Added By EnglishRose on 21-03-2010
Could the school not just issue another 2 tickets ...
Added By why? on 23-03-2010
hello er.
there is no issue the number of p...
Added By Stuart on 29-03-2010
"the issue is that he refuses to attend most event...
Added By why? on 02-04-2010
hi stuart.
i never brought up the s...

Subject: Looking for some advice....
Posted By Seaside Matt on 11-03-2010
My wife recently left me completely out of the blue and I am looking for some advice on my rights.
When we got together my wife was in thousands of debt and her credit rating was worse than Portsmouth FC's poin...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 11-03-2010
With the finances all the assets (including pensio...

Subject: Questionnaire and Statement of Issues
Posted By easyrider on 08-03-2010
Help.. I need to submitt the above next week and do not know what I am suppose to write. Can anyone give me some pointers please?
Added By why? on 09-03-2010
you are meant to write down any questions you have...
Added By easyrider on 09-03-2010
so did you manage to sort out a settlement between...
Added By easyrider on 09-03-2010
Also my EX is after spousal maintenance. I really ...
Added By Simes 2p on 10-03-2010
Easy, you can only get very general advice as to h...
Added By why? on 10-03-2010
no we have not yet reache d agreement and he is th...
Added By easyrider on 11-03-2010
I agree to check everything that come in and out o...
Added By why? on 11-03-2010
i dont see why not. i have kept texts whereby my h...
Added By EnglishRose on 11-03-2010
We didn't bother with all these forms and reached ...

Subject: Best way forward?
Posted By silver52 on 07-03-2010
My wife left home five years ago this month to pursue another relationship, I split the tenancy of the house and made a will after the first year to protect the rights of my five children if i was to pass away etc, the childr...
Added By Stuart on 07-03-2010
Hi.
Unfotunately there is no easy r...

Subject: open offer or without predjudice?
Posted By why? on 04-03-2010
hi.
the situation is:
h put forward an open offer stating that i had 2 weeks to accept or he was removing the offer. he offered to pay mortgage. i did not reject the offer but needed longer to fully cons...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
Usual bickering rubbish that goes along with solic...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
Offer to meet him half way between his position an...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
In open correspondence. Or just conceed either way...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
Pride does come before a fall (speaking from exper...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
The deadlines are to put pressure on and try to fo...
Added By why? on 05-03-2010
hi.
thanks for all that.
we havent a...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
yes, well, have a bit of experience with solicitor...
Added By EnglishRose on 11-03-2010
You can consider things over night if you ...

Subject: Section 47 assault
Posted By iwish on 04-03-2010
Previous thread on this is
http://www.ondivorce.co.uk/messageboard/mb-index.php?mb_id=2&subject_id=8111
Finally got to see some evidence. The welfare police officers have been interviewed and hav...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
good luck. Agree with sol as magistrates convict 1...
Added By Captain Oates on 05-03-2010
Think Magistrates, think Victor Meldrew on a bad g...
Added By iwish on 06-03-2010
Captain.., Sol said since matter is going to Crown...
Added By Captain Oates on 06-03-2010
Jury is good, more honest then Judges and less pro...
Added By Captain Oates on 06-03-2010
Try to do other things other than worry.
Added By iwish on 06-03-2010
I think you are right about it being political. Th...

Subject: Thoughts/Advice????
Posted By Jools123 on 04-03-2010
Went back to court today for increased access....thinking 21 months Sat 9 - Sun 5.30pm without fail would be sufficient to show reliability and consistency would give the judge an indication of my value as a father to my daug...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-03-2010
Usually it's much better not to upset the applecar...
Added By Jools123 on 05-03-2010
Surely you aren't the sort of person who abandons ...
Added By why? on 09-03-2010
good luck jools. i am sure it will sort itself out...
Added By Jools123 on 09-03-2010
Thanks Why...
Well the welfare conc...
Added By Tania on 09-03-2010
Hi Jooles123
I do thing some welfar...
Added By Jools123 on 09-03-2010
Point taken but my daughter is in bed between 7-7....
Added By why? on 10-03-2010
i can certainly emphasise with you regarding the i...
Added By Jools123 on 10-03-2010
oh why...your initial paragraphs are sad and I fee...
Added By why? on 11-03-2010
i totally agree.the children should know all those...
Added By Jools123 on 11-03-2010
oh yes, my daughter has me - daddy and has called ...
Added By why? on 11-03-2010
the best bit is. nobody,no matter how hard they tr...

Subject: Help, unstable wife
Posted By PennyO on 02-03-2010
Can anyone help? My brother has been having marital problems and told his wife a few weeks ago he wants a divorce. She threatened to commit suicide. Their problems have gotten worse since then and he is thinking of leaving...
Added By evr on 02-03-2010
There are no legal implications if someone chooses...
Added By Joyce. on 02-03-2010
Suicidal ideation (thinking about, expressing inte...
Added By Joyce. on 02-03-2010
Just an after thought - you might like to ask him ...
Added By Suvla1915 on 03-03-2010
Suicidal feelings are not usually conjured up to m...
Added By juggler on 03-03-2010
If I read the original post correctly, the wife ha...
Added By LazyLizzie on 03-03-2010
I have to agree with Juggler here. How long do you...
Added By Suvla1915 on 03-03-2010
I wasn't suggesting he should stay...
Added By evr on 03-03-2010
What would make me take such a threat seriously is...

Subject: Holiday abroad
Posted By 99er on 02-03-2010
My H has a court order permitting him to take the children abroad for holidays as long as he gives details of all flights, accomodation and length of duration to ex W no less than 14 days before the holiday at which point she...
Added By Stuart on 02-03-2010
At the time? Nothing.
However, as l...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 02-03-2010
When threats are being made to withhold contact t...
Added By Stuart on 03-03-2010
Surely there would be no need for such an order gi...
Added By 99er on 03-03-2010
Thanks both of you. We weren't aware of the specif...
Added By Simes 2p on 03-03-2010
Give her the full details 14 days before. If she ...
Added By 99er on 04-03-2010
Simes,
Are you able to just turn up...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-03-2010
That's why in circumstances like this a SIO to cov...
Added By Simes 2p on 04-03-2010
99er, yes you can pitch up at Court and ask to see...

Subject: Help
Posted By easyrider on 02-03-2010
I don’t know what the following mean and they have to submitted to court soon. Can any anyone clarify:
-a concise statement of apparent issues between yourself and the other party
-a chronology
...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 02-03-2010
The Statement of Issues should be short statement...

Subject: Is the charge reasonable?
Posted By ian12010 on 01-03-2010
I need some advice on whether a charge from my solicitor is reasonable.
Background
I am in the process of divorcing my wife on the ground of her unreasonable behaviour. At the beginning, my solic...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-03-2010
I would not refuse to pay a solicitor, after all t...
Added By Simes 2p on 01-03-2010
Stidsy, oh that is a dissapointing response. Stat...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-03-2010
£165 fees. Wouldn't worry, just worry when you ge...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-03-2010
When my divorce went acrimonious and I was looking...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-03-2010
That was how much solicitors wanted to go on the r...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-03-2010
I'd agree with simes, solicitors would probably no...

Subject: Things just get worse and worse so fed up
Posted By Kat007 on 28-02-2010
Here we go again so sorry,
So Ex wrote asking for clarification of my budget for moving, what rental amount I can afford, he sent through some properties not even anywhere near our area, infact these one's wher...
Added By Simes 2p on 28-02-2010
Kat, as everyone tells you to not communicate with...
Added By Owl1 on 01-03-2010
Kat , ditto to Simes above. for the thousandeth ti...
Added By Kat007 on 04-03-2010
ok that was interesting,
Ex stated...
Added By Jools123 on 05-03-2010
Kat - he's making himself look like a fool.
...
Added By Owl1 on 05-03-2010
So the nub of all that Kat is this.
...
Added By Kat007 on 08-03-2010
Hi Owl,
Ex did say my expectations ...
Added By Owl1 on 08-03-2010
I suppose its the type of evidence you provide tha...
Added By Kat007 on 11-03-2010
Hi Owl,
There was another suggestio...
Added By Owl1 on 13-03-2010
Kat, I wouldn't waste money on a restraining order...

Subject: form E continued...............
Posted By easyrider on 25-02-2010
Form E's were due to be submitted to court. I have filed mine on time but E has yet to file. Is this considered to be a gross misconduct as it means we are unable to exchange forms and unable to discuss offers? My sol has sug...
Added By Simes 2p on 26-02-2010
Easyrider, not meeting a Court deadline is standar...
Added By easyrider on 27-02-2010
Simes I have submitted my Form E. Are all the fina...
Added By Simes 2p on 27-02-2010
ER, the figure used will be on the day of the fina...
Added By easyrider on 01-03-2010
I don’t know what the following mean and they ha...

Subject: Quick update
Posted By juggler on 23-02-2010
Went to court today and the ex's solicitor said all was well. My solicitor repeated all the things that have gone wrong recently and about the ex being under pressure (due to problems with his fiancee and his fraud case etc) ...

Subject: divorced and happy to talk about it?
Posted By heartfeats on 23-02-2010
hi guys, to introduce myself, my name is Christabel Smith. As well as being a divorcee myself, I'm a journalist of many years standing. I was a women's magazine editor and now run my own features agency, called Heart Features...

Subject: settlements
Posted By smarties19 on 21-02-2010
got divorced sept 06 (not my idea). since then much toing and froing on his part, made a mistake, left his woman, shouldn't have left etc. inbetween times i am an evil cow and all the names under the sun. he is now saying ...
Added By Stuart on 21-02-2010
If you're not ready to start things then I'd sit t...

Subject: Dont know what to do...
Posted By keephappy1 on 21-02-2010
It's been now 4 weeks since my 2 children has had any contact with there dad, before when this has happend I have got in contact with him and asked when he was seeing his children again, but this time I cant be bother I have...
Added By why? on 21-02-2010
i guess it partly dependson what age your children...
Added By keephappy1 on 22-02-2010
Thanks why,
My children are 4 and 7...

Subject: CAFCASS meeting
Posted By kat007 on 20-02-2010
As you are aware we have a new wishes and feelings meeting soon. I have not told my child about it yet but as the ex knows I am sure he would have told them and worked his magic while they have been away, or maybe he hasn't w...
Added By EnglishRose on 20-02-2010
I think they are in total meltdown from the recent...
Added By Simes 2p on 23-02-2010
Kat, the new CO will have read the file and probab...
Added By Kat007 on 24-02-2010
So meeting done thankfully.
Child a...

Subject: Child of the Family
Posted By Twinkle2 on 19-02-2010
Hi everyone. You all really helped me with my divorce 4 years ago and now, unfortunately, my sister is getting divorced.
Quick question, her husband has a daughter from a previous relationship. The daughter liv...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-02-2010
Short answer is yes, if the child didn't live with...
Added By Twinkle2 on 21-02-2010
Hi - thanks for the reply. So it doesn't matter th...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 21-02-2010
That's right. A "child of the family" is a child w...

Subject: Costs continued
Posted By Captain Oates on 17-02-2010
Well, for the 20mins direction hearing which I asked to see more of my children but lost badly and lost costs I received a bill from ex wife's solicitors for over £4,000.
I offered three quarters of that but h...
Added By EnglishRose on 17-02-2010
You can make a without prejudice offer in writing ...
Added By Captain Oates on 17-02-2010
The fees from now until we settle, who pays them? ...
Added By EnglishRose on 17-02-2010
If it's like other types of court actions, whoever...
Added By LazyLizzie on 17-02-2010
Have you tried contacting the Law Society? When I ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-02-2010
I agree with ER. There is a general court rule tha...
Added By Simes 2p on 18-02-2010
CO,
It would help you to make a lis...
Added By EnglishRose on 18-02-2010
They do that on assessment. A detailed bill gets d...
Added By Simes 2p on 18-02-2010
ER, I was suggesting, as CO is likely to end up pa...
Added By EnglishRose on 18-02-2010
Yes, well the system for bigger cases anyway is th...
Added By Captain Oates on 18-02-2010
Well, thanks for the replies.
Lazyl...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 18-02-2010
As I said above the Law Society won't deal with co...
Added By Captain Oates on 18-02-2010
Well, the line
* the solicitor uses...
Added By Captain Oates on 18-02-2010
They are not trying to threaten me with court and ...
Added By LazyLizzie on 18-02-2010
STIDW
I was aware tat the Law Society would...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-02-2010
The thing is if a solicitor's bill is for work tha...
Added By EnglishRose on 20-02-2010
This is nothing to do with the fault of lawyers. T...
Added By Captain Oates on 22-02-2010
I have offered them £3k without prejudice except ...
Added By Captain Oates on 22-02-2010
What happens if the court come up with a figure be...
Added By Captain Oates on 25-02-2010
Settled on £3,500 over 6 months. Shame on them do...

Subject: What to do....
Posted By juggler on 17-02-2010
Have no idea what to do for the best. Its been an absolutely rubbish year so far, younger son diagnosed with "autistic traits" (although that wasn't a surprise), my Grandma died suddenly and her funeral is next Monday then th...
Added By Simes 2p on 17-02-2010
Hey Jugs,
I think you need to foll...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-02-2010
I think your solicitor is correct too and you are ...
Added By juggler on 17-02-2010
Blimey, that's well remembered, STIDW! That report...
Added By why? on 18-02-2010
crikey. shame you didnt just let him do it during ...
Added By EnglishRose on 18-02-2010
I agree. He sounds dreadful. Supervised contact so...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-02-2010
I remember it well. At the time of the report cont...
Added By juggler on 19-02-2010
That's an interesting post, STIDW.
...

Subject: Extended family Relationships
Posted By Wilco11 on 16-02-2010
I wonder if you can offer some advice/experience on the below.
My partner split up with his ex 4 years ago after a very messy and horrible seperation whereby his ex took his baby away to another country without him kno...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 16-02-2010
You aren't overreacting, it's a difficult situatio...
Added By Wilco11 on 16-02-2010
Thank you very much for your advice. I think you a...
Added By LazyLizzie on 16-02-2010
When I divorced my husband I went to let my in law...
Added By EnglishRose on 18-02-2010
I understand both sides. I suspect if they don't d...
Added By Wilco11 on 25-02-2010
Thanks for all your advice. I guess from what you...

Subject: standard of Living
Posted By easyrider on 16-02-2010
in section 4.2 on form e - shall i add the fact that ex and i had separate bank accounts and separate finances?

Subject: giving my wife the house
Posted By bighoi on 15-02-2010
hi all ,,i was looking for some advice ,,i am getting a divorce just now and my wife and children are living in the family home which is in my name solely,,my wife has asked if she can get the house in the divorce settlement ...
Added By Captain Oates on 15-02-2010
You need to get mortgage into her name also, to do...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-02-2010
Is your wife able to rise a mortgage on her own? L...
Added By bighoi on 15-02-2010
she is a house wife with no income ,,i currently g...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-02-2010
Without knowing the details of the values of any a...
Added By why? on 15-02-2010
hi. my h and i are hoping to transfer house to mys...
Added By Stuart on 16-02-2010
Why....your situation has absolutely no similarity...
Added By why? on 18-02-2010
hi.
my reason for giving the above informat...

Subject: Just want to take them on hol to see grandparents!
Posted By Ess on 14-02-2010
About a month ago, I told my ex I wanted to take the kids to South Africa to see their grandparents. The was the easter hols work, it means it will interfere with kids weekeneds with ex so I emailed him about it saying I was...
Added By Kat007 on 15-02-2010
Hi Ess,
Good on you for offering al...
Added By Simes 2p on 15-02-2010
Why not just respond and say its great that you re...
Added By why? on 15-02-2010
also, remember. he was quite adamant that the alte...
Added By Stuart on 16-02-2010
The tone of his email is clearly arsey but ignorin...
Added By Ess on 16-02-2010
Thanks all.
I've just emailed him asking hi...
Added By Ess on 16-02-2010
Kat
I truly believe that if I won the lotte...
Added By Stuart on 19-02-2010
Then he is shooting himself in the foot....
Added By Ess on 21-02-2010
ok, he's agreed that she can work one of the three...

Subject: Advice
Posted By karmatime on 14-02-2010
Hi,
It's been years since I've sought all your advice. It used to be good to run things by this group when I got divorced, let's see how helpful you all are now.
My 10 year old daughter has been...
Added By evr on 14-02-2010
No, you're not overreacting, that isn't a good ide...
Added By why? on 14-02-2010
i have to agree with you on this. it is not accept...
Added By Kat007 on 15-02-2010
No not over reacting at all, I have a 13yr old boy...
Added By Captain Oates on 15-02-2010
I think my local council says it is wrong that gir...
Added By Captain Oates on 15-02-2010
On second thoughts , you could wrap her up in cott...
Added By why? on 15-02-2010
wow. kat. i had no idea there was actually law on ...
Added By Stuart on 16-02-2010
Err....over-reacting??????? Err...the hell you're ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-02-2010
There’s no law in existence which governs childr...
Added By why? on 18-02-2010
they were sharing a bed however, not just a room. ...
Added By Captain Oates on 18-02-2010
Well, not that big a deal perhaps, there is someth...
Added By why? on 19-02-2010
no captain. basic facts are that they are underage...
Added By Stuart on 20-02-2010
yep...I agree....
Added By karmatime on 21-02-2010
Ok I think we're mainly agreed that this was the w...
Added By Stuart on 21-02-2010
Hmmm....
A difficult one.....
...
Added By Captain Oates on 22-02-2010
You don't get pregnant from sleeping in the same b...

Subject: Advice, my partners ex....
Posted By Jools123 on 11-02-2010
Hi,
Previously I have posted on here about my situation with my daughter and also my partners situation with her son and ex.
I live with my partner and her son. He's nearly 14.
Las...
Added By Simes 2p on 11-02-2010
The only stipulation is that he comes to the.........
Added By Jools123 on 11-02-2010
oops, that he comes to our house to collect him.
Added By Jools123 on 11-02-2010
i.e. after implying it was a good thing our babies...
Added By Simes 2p on 11-02-2010
How does that prevent contact with them?
Added By Jools123 on 11-02-2010
How does that prevent contact with them? Because t...
Added By Ess on 11-02-2010
Hi Jools
He does sound like a complete t***...
Added By Simes 2p on 11-02-2010
Jools,
Reading your rant, there is ...
Added By Jools123 on 12-02-2010
Simes - I rant because he frustrates me. I have to...
Added By Jools123 on 12-02-2010
ESS - sorry I didn't respond. Did we find out why ...
Added By NikkiSue on 12-02-2010
Jools123
I wouldnt worry about cont...
Added By Owl1 on 12-02-2010
Jools I can understand you must feel frustrated bu...
Added By EnglishRose on 12-02-2010
My chidlren at 14 travelled all over the place al...
Added By why? on 13-02-2010
jools.
i personally think that those who un...
Added By Owl1 on 13-02-2010
Why, some of us are not so removed as we have expe...
Added By evr on 13-02-2010
If you are PWC there are lots of times when you ha...
Added By Stuart on 13-02-2010
Hear, hear Owl...
Added By why? on 13-02-2010
owl.
i personally think that there are time...
Added By Simes 2p on 13-02-2010
Jools, When you say that you are doing nothing to ...
Added By why? on 13-02-2010
im assuming the court order was done quite some ti...
Added By evr on 13-02-2010
Thing is why, its a dangerous thing to guess what ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 13-02-2010
Yes, and this seems very much a provocation and re...
Added By why? on 14-02-2010
hi.evr, i didnt say anyone should 'guess'what a ch...
Added By Captain Oates on 17-02-2010
That A34 is a pig boring rubbish road, not a nice ...
Added By Captain Oates on 17-02-2010
Also ER makes a good point for a change. Also like...

Subject: Controlling I think
Posted By Kat007 on 07-02-2010
So ex has been writing all week, I currently do not have the funds for sols so have been replied to them.
Then I recieved a rather aggressive letter. I have still been unable to move as property is so scarse an...
Added By Simes 2p on 07-02-2010
Kat, you have to laugh at him, stop writing as it ...
Added By Owl1 on 07-02-2010
Kat. STOP writing back to him. You don't have to. ...
Added By Kat007 on 08-02-2010
Do you know what everyone has said the same don't ...
Added By Owl1 on 08-02-2010
Kat, you are not a solicitor so as LIP you are not...
Added By Simes 2p on 08-02-2010
Kat,
1 Will a judge think I am bein...
Added By Ess on 08-02-2010
Hi Kat
I just wanted to add that I understa...
Added By Stuart on 08-02-2010
You want my 2 penneth.....
He's a g...
Added By Tania on 08-02-2010
Sorry to read what you're experiencing and that it...
Added By dts on 08-02-2010
Kat,
I can't believe that this tw*t...
Added By why? on 10-02-2010
id ignore the life threatening struff too. just ma...
Added By Kat007 on 11-02-2010
Thanks Guy's for your unending support your advice...
Added By EnglishRose on 13-02-2010
What is stopping you all moving into a rented flat...
Added By why? on 13-02-2010
no upheavel then er. that will be good for kats he...
Added By Kat007 on 13-02-2010
Oh er, you make me laugh.
What is s...
Added By Stuart on 16-02-2010
move into a rented flat for a week or two....

Subject: A bit of advice
Posted By Tomas on 05-02-2010
Hi,
I have recently written a play entitled "Matryoshka" based on the experience of a very close family friend who was caught up in a long and emotionally fraught divorce case. She is a mother with three young ...
Added By Suvla1915 on 07-02-2010
Post the link and I'would be interested in reading...
Added By NikkiSue on 12-02-2010
Please post a link. I am new on here and would be ...
Added By Tomas on 12-02-2010
Apologies for being so slow in posting the link, I...

Subject: Court
Posted By easyrider on 05-02-2010
I may need to take matters to court to increase contact. The last hearing was heard by a circuit judge who was very support of contact being increased to the level it is and made an order in the hearing. How can I try to get ...
Added By EnglishRose on 05-02-2010
May be the court clerks could let you know but I t...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 05-02-2010
In children cases continuity is considered importa...
Added By easyrider on 07-02-2010
so sometimesitdoesn'twork it is possible to get th...

Subject: Light at the end of the tunnel
Posted By dts on 02-02-2010
Hi everybody,
I have already received superb advice on here regarding a question I asked the other day. Thanks to all that responded.
Thought I would post a bit about what is happening in my case...
Added By Ess on 02-02-2010
Hi light. It's lovely to read a positive experien...
Added By dts on 02-02-2010
Hi Ess,
Thanks for your kind though...
Added By Ess on 02-02-2010
Hi dts - sorry I called you "Light" when I replied...
Added By skovby1 on 02-02-2010
I thought I was reading an old post of mine for a ...
Added By dts on 03-02-2010
Ess, Skovby1
Thanks for your suppor...
Added By Kat007 on 03-02-2010
dts,
So lovely to hear that everyth...
Added By Ess on 03-02-2010
I wish I could find some words of wisdom for you o...
Added By dts on 04-02-2010
Kat,
Thanks so much for your words ...
Added By Ess on 04-02-2010
Hi dts - I hear what you're saying about being rel...
Added By EnglishRose on 06-02-2010
My family are mostly psychiatrists. They do tend t...
Added By dts on 08-02-2010
Hi Ess,
Thanks for the support.
Added By skovby1 on 08-02-2010
I think it is important to actually allow yourself...
Added By dts on 08-02-2010
Hi skovby1,
Thanks for your support...
Added By dts on 08-02-2010
Sorry, made a mistake with the email address. It s...

Subject: Should I stay or should I go?
Posted By Suspicious Minds on 31-01-2010
I would appreciate some opinions on the dilemma I find myself in.
I am now divorced and the FMH is on the market. My cheating ex has moved abroad with the woman he left me for and is out of contact with myself ...
Added By LazyLizzie on 31-01-2010
I can appreciate how you feel - lots of people fee...
Added By EnglishRose on 01-02-2010
I think you need to find a local boyfriend. I have...
Added By Teadrinker on 01-02-2010
I like Lazy Lizzie's idea of renting for a while s...
Added By why? on 10-02-2010
i dont personally think renting would be the answe...

Subject: Taking Children on Holiday
Posted By Ess on 31-01-2010
My ex and I have been divorced for 5 years and our relationship seems to have deteriorated year on year.
I sent him an email (the only way he will communicate with me) saying that I would like to take our child...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 31-01-2010
Strictly speaking you do not require his consent t...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 31-01-2010
Sorry the first sentence should read *less* than ...
Added By Ess on 31-01-2010
Thanks STIDW. There seems to be such a lot of con...
Added By Ess on 31-01-2010
Can you tell me which forms I would need to fill i...
Added By Jools123 on 01-02-2010
Do you have a court order? Are you breaking the co...
Added By Stuart on 01-02-2010
Whether you have a contact order etc makes no diff...
Added By Jools123 on 01-02-2010
If it breaks the order and no provisions for holid...
Added By Ess on 02-02-2010
Oooops - yes, I meant £1800! No Jools, there is ...
Added By Stuart on 02-02-2010
If he wants to stop you from going then he is goin...
Added By Ess on 02-02-2010
Thanks Stuart - I think the only reason he would h...
Added By why? on 10-02-2010
go on holiday. its the childrens grandparents. its...

Subject: ha ha here's a laugh
Posted By Kat007 on 30-01-2010
So ex is getting married again ha ha so funny everyone who mentions it too me just laughs and says how rediculas, i just say not bothered, not interested, couldn't care which is all true.
Got an e-mail from him...
Added By Suvla1915 on 30-01-2010
What a cheek!
Added By skovby1 on 30-01-2010
Amazing how some people cannot look after the sing...
Added By LazyLizzie on 30-01-2010
My ex came round to see me to ask if I could let h...
Added By Kat007 on 31-01-2010
Exactly one of the most important pieces of paper ...
Added By Stuart on 02-02-2010
"Maybe I could have given it to him with a downloa...
Added By Kat007 on 03-02-2010
However I have come to realise that if I did this ...
Added By london on 06-02-2010
Why is it such an issue to let ex-spouse have a co...
Added By Kat007 on 06-02-2010
Well it actually turns out that he didn't need it ...
Added By why? on 11-02-2010
i understand that you would not want to help him d...

Subject: Lost
Posted By Captain Oates on 29-01-2010
Well. Devastated. Was a directions hearing. Supposed to be there for 30 mins. The case before went on then we came back in the afternoon and he heard us.
The judge said ok for not being there last time, then or...
Added By Captain Oates on 30-01-2010
Costs on a directions hearing can't be right? Shou...
Added By Kat007 on 30-01-2010
Sorry that happened and from my understanding cost...
Added By EnglishRose on 30-01-2010
In other types of litigation costs for intermediat...
Added By Captain Oates on 31-01-2010
wasn't my bundle and wasn't found to be at fault f...
Added By Simes 2p on 31-01-2010
CO,
'He said it lacked merit and or...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-02-2010
I asked to set aside the last order as I couldn't ...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-02-2010
Should I appeal as the application was in good int...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-02-2010
Application was also so I did no longer have the t...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-02-2010
Can I get the court to cancel this as perhaps they...
Added By Simes 2p on 01-02-2010
CO, it doesn't make sense to me, but then the majo...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-02-2010
He said first part was not valid as was out of tim...
Added By Captain Oates on 01-02-2010
Also, they put a bundle together but the judge did...
Added By Simes 2p on 02-02-2010
CO,
I am pretty sure you only pay f...
Added By Captain Oates on 02-02-2010
Cheers.
Added By Captain Oates on 02-02-2010
I hope you are right.

Subject: Separating
Posted By Pabs on 28-01-2010
Newley seperating in need of positive boost. Anyone any good advice?
Added By Kat007 on 30-01-2010
yep a bit more info and advice could be given, rea...
Added By Pabs on 01-02-2010
Yes 3 kids involved. Just not working out happy fo...
Added By Ess on 02-02-2010
Hi Pabs
First of all, sorry you're in this ...
Added By Hodditt on 03-02-2010
Your story mirrors my own.
After be...
Added By Pabs on 04-02-2010
Hi Ess & Hodditt,
Just reading thes...

Subject: Question regarding csa and benefits
Posted By dts on 27-01-2010
Hi all,
My wife and I are recently separated and so far we have managed to remain amicable and have sorted out all the finances, future maintenance levels, who has what, etc.
My question concerns...
Added By Captain Oates on 27-01-2010
If either side goes there they will do it (unless ...
Added By dts on 27-01-2010
Hi Captain Oates,
Thanks for your r...
Added By Stuart on 27-01-2010
I thought that if the recipient was getting benefi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-01-2010
I think a lot of sites are now out of date. If the...
Added By dts on 28-01-2010
Hi sometimesitdoesn'twork,
This seems to fi...
Added By skovby1 on 28-01-2010
I think there are new rules coming into force from...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-01-2010
Just to clarify, since October 2008 it is no longe...
Added By dts on 01-02-2010
Hi sometimes,
Thanks for your reply...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-02-2010
From April there will be no longer any connection...
Added By dts on 02-02-2010
Thanks.

Subject: help please
Posted By fred12345 on 27-01-2010
my wife applied for an divorce nisi and recieved it in 2004 i have been urging her to get the divorce absolute ever since then, it is only just now 6 years later that she has applied for it and i was wondering if there i...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-01-2010
Did you seek legal advice? When the nisi is more t...

Subject: Years after parents' divorce
Posted By sophiec83 on 26-01-2010
Sorry this is so long but I think people need some background to understand where I'm coming from...
Six years ago my father left my mum for another woman and soon after they divorced and he remarried. He has s...
Added By Stuart on 26-01-2010
Hi,
No, you are not over reacting a...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
Hi sophiec83, I just wanted to say that I am in t...
Added By Teadrinker on 27-01-2010
Hi Sophie.
I think you are doing th...
Added By Jools123 on 27-01-2010
Sophie - I think its extremely sad that your mothe...
Added By Suvla1915 on 27-01-2010
Jools, the reasons for his adultery are irrelevant...
Added By Jools123 on 27-01-2010
Sulva - "Of course he set out to hurt her and sadl...
Added By Suvla1915 on 27-01-2010
Well I disagree. People don't have affairs by acci...
Added By Teadrinker on 27-01-2010
I think people probably have affairs because they ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-01-2010
Harbouring resentment against a parent is unhelpf...
Added By Jools123 on 28-01-2010
Ok, to address a few points.
I had ...
Added By Owl1 on 28-01-2010
Well stated STIDW.
"Sophie can deci...
Added By Owl1 on 28-01-2010
Jools our posts crossed.
Good on yo...
Added By Jools123 on 28-01-2010
Hi Owl,
I don't beg for forgiveness...
Added By Owl1 on 28-01-2010
"I suppose we've gone slightly off thread but my p...
Added By Jools123 on 28-01-2010
I don't believe I ever said that I didn't think it...
Added By Owl1 on 28-01-2010
So you consciously knew you were hurting her Jools...
Added By Jools123 on 28-01-2010
Yes I did (know it was hurting her) and wish I had...
Added By EnglishRose on 29-01-2010
Don't 30% or 50% of people in marriages have an af...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-02-2010
I think the statement about having an affair to hu...
Added By Suvla1915 on 07-02-2010
"There is an element of reckless behavior that is...
Added By Jools123 on 07-02-2010
Nothing like a drink driver - absolute b*ll*cks!
Added By Suvla1915 on 07-02-2010
In terms of level of intent, that's what I meant. ...
Added By Owl1 on 07-02-2010
I tend to agree with Suvla's analogy of drunk driv...
Added By Jools123 on 07-02-2010
And drunk drivers kill! Stupid comments! Especiall...
Added By Owl1 on 07-02-2010
Jools calm down and think about it what is being s...

Subject: CSA payments
Posted By iwish on 24-01-2010
I noticed a while ago that CSA stopped taking payments from my account...last payment was 15 July
I normally transfer CSA payments to another account where I have the DD setup fro CSA. My standing order keeps t...
Added By iwish on 24-01-2010
Just to add the CSA have been taking money via DD ...
Added By Captain Oates on 25-01-2010
You are complaining because the CSA have stopped t...
Added By Captain Oates on 25-01-2010
Put the money aside and see what happens.
Added By iwish on 25-01-2010
I have always provided for my kids though at the m...
Added By Captain Oates on 25-01-2010
I think it's an excellent excuse not to provide, b...
Added By iwish on 25-01-2010
I know where you are coming from Captain. If it wa...
Added By Ess on 25-01-2010
Lots of respect for you iwish. You have a wider v...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
Well, not just anger, my point is that nrp men hav...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
My ex is not sensible :) .

Subject: Do I stay or Do I go?
Posted By smp999 on 23-01-2010
I moved out of the MH the day after boxing day following a very physical bust up with the Mrs where (you can believe all you like from here on but this is my story and above all, THE TRUTH, she is in total denial to any respo...
Added By Stuart on 24-01-2010
firstly you need to decide if you want to work at ...
Added By why? on 24-01-2010
hi. i have absolutely no idea why people are advis...
Added By Captain Oates on 24-01-2010
When I moved out the locks were changed and the of...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 24-01-2010
The usual legal advice is not to move out until ar...
Added By EnglishRose on 25-01-2010
yes move back. Possession is indeed 9.`10s of the ...

Subject: Advice please....
Posted By Peedoff on 22-01-2010
Hi...new on here, and never thought I'd be here...but here I am !! The t0ssw@nk that is my husband went back home for a month...came back in October to tell me (the day after his return) that he didn't love me anymore and ne...
Added By Kat007 on 22-01-2010
Sorry you find yourself here but feel free to ran...
Added By Peedoff on 22-01-2010
Thank you so much Kat...'back home' is abroad and ...
Added By EnglishRose on 25-01-2010
The landlord may not agree to him being taken off ...
Added By Stuart on 26-01-2010
Think ER might be a bit wrong....
T...
Added By Peedoff on 26-01-2010
Thanks guys...I just can't contemplate anything at...
Added By Stuart on 26-01-2010
Have you spoken to your landlord?
Might be ...
Added By Peedoff on 27-01-2010
Thanks Stuart...we've lived in the flat for 14yrs ...
Added By Stuart on 27-01-2010
Thats what we are here for.
Main th...
Added By Peedoff on 27-01-2010
I'm am trying...he seems to be getting on with thi...

Subject: section 47 ASSAULT
Posted By IWISH on 20-01-2010
Hi guys,
some help please...got charged with section 47 assault today after 7 months of police investigation.
Assualt allegedly took place on a Thursday in April 2009. My ex said I hit my son whe...
Added By Jools123 on 20-01-2010
Get yourself a very good lawyer now! From experien...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-01-2010
well to be completely correct- the Police arent......
Added By iwish on 20-01-2010
obiwan you are right but does it take 8 months to ...
Added By iwish on 20-01-2010
do I have to notify my employer that I have been c...
Added By Jools123 on 20-01-2010
No - innocent until proven guilty. If however they...
Added By iwish on 20-01-2010
work for local council..I have told my immediate b...
Added By Jools123 on 20-01-2010
I would say you've done all you need to....
Added By iwish on 20-01-2010
after a conviction hope not do police notify your ...
Added By Captain Oates on 20-01-2010
If you have no criminal record you can get legal a...
Added By Stuart on 21-01-2010
If you are convicted then I think you will be in b...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 21-01-2010
Yes it does- the reason it takes so long with adul...
Added By iwish on 22-01-2010
Thank you for your input guys much appreciated.
Added By iwish on 22-01-2010
Captain Oates what do you mean by your statement "...
Added By Captain Oates on 22-01-2010
On family law, legal aid is about income.
<...
Added By iwish on 22-01-2010
Thanks for the info captain...I do appreciate it.<...
Added By Simes 2p on 23-01-2010
Legal Aid has absolutely no relationship to previo...
Added By Captain Oates on 23-01-2010
I admit I did ask for and got the solicitor at the...
Added By Simes 2p on 23-01-2010
CO,
It all depends what you said to...
Added By iwish on 23-01-2010
Thanks for the clarification.. I thought the same....
Added By Captain Oates on 23-01-2010
Yes, I have boss' letter and did try to let them k...
Added By Simes 2p on 24-01-2010
CO, having studied legal aid in criminal cases, I ...
Added By EnglishRose on 25-01-2010
Also think about other evidence on yoru side. Who ...
Added By iwish on 25-01-2010
Thanks ER.. My ex refused me access to kids for 3 ...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-01-2010
ER, you have never smacked your children.
<...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
Trying not to sound pompous self rightious. There ...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
I have just read ERs statement and it is weird. If...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
Simes, what was that term you were using before wh...
Added By Stuart on 26-01-2010
Never hit my son....never needed to....
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
You've been talking to my ex - she thinks that abo...
Added By Captain Oates on 26-01-2010
Waterboarding perhaps, plausable denyability that ...
Added By Melly53 on 27-01-2010
Regarding informing your employer, as you work for...

Subject: Increasing Contact
Posted By easyrider on 18-01-2010
Hi. New here. I have had 2 nights overnight contact with my 4 year old child for the past 3 months. When is going to be a good time to ask for more ie to progress to 3 then 4 nights and then half of holidays? I know that EX w...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-01-2010
What are the terms of the existing order?
Added By easyrider on 19-01-2010
from friday after school to 6pm on sunday alternat...
Added By Jools123 on 19-01-2010
Hi,
My daughter is nearly 4. I have...
Added By easyrider on 19-01-2010
such a joke!!!
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-01-2010
If the order is for Fri - Sun alternate weekends w...
Added By easyrider on 19-01-2010
sorry I am meant that I am having to 2 nights a fo...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-01-2010
I would say wait 6 months and then maybe apply wit...

Subject: Joining the list
Posted By rassman on 18-01-2010
ok brief history, ask questions as required. Wife asked me to move out in middle of october, i did and moved back to good old parents. She asked me twice to come back and i said no(didnt think things were fixed between us), a...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-01-2010
The usual legal advise is not to move out in the f...

Subject: Joining the list
Posted By rassman on 18-01-2010
ok brief history, ask questions as required. Wife asked me to move out in middle of october, i did and moved back to good old parents. She asked me twice to come back and i said no(didnt think things were fixed between us), a...

Subject: Nasty Nasty person Some people need to get help lol
Posted By Kat007 on 18-01-2010
So here I am thinking about how a person can change so much and treat the person they once professed to love with such hate and animosity towards them. I just don't get it. Is it because I haven't fallen apart without him, ha...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 18-01-2010
why?
3.5 million years ago man apes...
Added By Owl1 on 18-01-2010
"Is this a case of an angry Mr Kat or is it a case...
Added By Jools123 on 18-01-2010
Oh Kat - his relationship is toxic.
...
Added By Nancy on 18-01-2010
I very rarely post nowadays, but do pop in from ti...
Added By rassman on 18-01-2010
yeh, i dont understand why people turn so evil, my...
Added By Kat007 on 18-01-2010
Owl,
Harsh no not at all, not compa...
Added By Jellylegs on 18-01-2010
Kat
Out of the blue, 18m after he left, I ...
Added By Kat007 on 19-01-2010
Hi Jelly,
Good to hear from you, an...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-01-2010
kat (though it PAINS me to say this...) owl has a ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-01-2010
hi owl! return of the jedi...
what ...
Added By Kat007 on 21-01-2010
Ok knackered now, it's 00.16am and need to sleep I...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 21-01-2010
Good Luck!
Added By Kat007 on 22-01-2010
Well that was fun, ex asked usher if his GF(financ...
Added By why? on 23-01-2010
kat.
you really have a horrid ex.the simila...

Subject: Silly emotions..
Posted By Stuart on 17-01-2010
My ex wife had a baby last night....little girl...
My son (12) seems to be taking it very well after feeling very upset at the idea.
Im glad and happy that he is gushing at having a lovely little sister ...
Added By LazyLizzie on 17-01-2010
Your feelings are very natural - as are your sons....
Added By Teadrinker on 18-01-2010
You're not being silly. But I'm sure your son will...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 18-01-2010
new things delight kids- but he wont forget his ol...
Added By Jools123 on 18-01-2010
Stuart,
My partners son was delight...
Added By Captain Oates on 18-01-2010
Stuart, I think I understand a little and I do sym...

Subject: Am I divorced? ... help
Posted By whichwaysup on 17-01-2010
I received papers from the county court this week - ive had no previous notice of this.
It states that hereby certified that the said decree was on the ...date... made final and absolute and that the said marr...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 18-01-2010
IF no one applies for the absolute after a year di...

Subject: 4 Weeks - Like nothing every happened :-)
Posted By Jools123 on 17-01-2010
Hi all,
My daughter is back from her extended Christmas break to South Africa with her mum and boyfriend.
I had access this weekend Fri 5pm to Sun 5.30pm.
I have to say, most comments were...
Added By Kat007 on 18-01-2010
Jools123,
Phew what a relief she mu...
Added By Owl1 on 18-01-2010
Good news Jools.
I think you are ri...
Added By Jools123 on 18-01-2010
Thanks Kat and Owl for your kind words!

Subject: Divorced? Please Read ! (Local Firm v City Firm)
Posted By r_elise on 15-01-2010
Hi, I am conducting some research with regards to how people choose their law firm in a divorce. So to those people who have been through a divorce or are going through one, what motivated you to choose the firm you have/did ...
Added By why? on 15-01-2010
hi. i opted for a local firm simply because i have...
Added By Teadrinker on 16-01-2010
I looked for a solicitor in my local area, partly ...
Added By skovby1 on 16-01-2010
We only used a solicitor to transfer the property ...
Added By Jellylegs on 18-01-2010
My firm were brilliant - 100% efficient and comple...

Subject: Following previous post
Posted By Captain Oates on 15-01-2010
I didn't go because I could not get the time off of work because a project I was working on was reaching it's conclusion.
I wrote to the court and the other side and gave them both a letter from my manager.
Added By Kat007 on 15-01-2010
Oats,
Hi You did the right thing yo...

Subject: Clean Break Order
Posted By Bubbles36 on 14-01-2010
My divorce finally came through today yipeeee!! I was the Petitioner and got a costs order against husband for him to pay my costs.... in the meantime I have had a letter from his solicitor, asking me to sign a consent order ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-01-2010
Answered on the other board.

Subject: how do I slowwwwwwwwwww down a divorce?
Posted By ihatecyclists on 14-01-2010
Hello everyone
I split up in 2008 and now ex h has contacted me for a divorce based on 2 yr separation by mutual concent, and whether I had any reasons why not? well I gave him a few!! (background, I have been ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-01-2010
Get rid and move on. Nothing will come out of slow...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 14-01-2010
i hate car drivers...
that aside......
Added By why? on 15-01-2010
i dont quite understand how or why his debts are n...
Added By Teadrinker on 16-01-2010
The only thing I think you can do is go ahead with...
Added By ihatecyclists on 16-01-2010
thanks for all your comments.
The ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 16-01-2010
it is written by my ancestors:
'man...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 16-01-2010
Emotion just hurts the wallet. The bottom line is...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-01-2010
STIDW- spot on..

Subject: How to sniff out clues of an affair from the most mundane conversations with your spouse
Posted By lisaray on 14-01-2010
About NetSpiderz
Netspiderz is dedicated in providing Email Surveillance & P a s s w o r d Recovery Services worldwide and now it’s in 4th year of existence. Netspiderz remains unbeatable in terms of exceedin...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-01-2010
Don't bother. It's illegal to hack into someone's ...
Added By Suvla1915 on 14-01-2010
The truth will out eventually anyway, you just hav...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 14-01-2010
gee thanks! i can get arrested for conspiracy to b...
Added By lisaray on 17-01-2010
You will be provided total anonymous access. ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-01-2010
What is the point? If there is no trust the relati...
Added By Stuart on 19-01-2010
Clearly not the most intelligent of posters lisara...
Added By redchad on 23-01-2010
Cant believe anyone would be naïve enough to thin...

Subject: Urgent: Do I need a barrister?
Posted By ian12010 on 14-01-2010
I filed petition for divorce on the ground of my wife’s unreasonable behaviour in August 2009 and just received a notice for a court hearing next Thursday and I need some advice on whether I need a barrister to represent me...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-01-2010
Some solicitor's are more experienced and more com...
Added By Simes 2p on 14-01-2010
'IT can help considerably if at least one party is...

Subject: first directions hearing
Posted By Kat007 on 11-01-2010
So had no choice to adjourn the first directions hearing as have an important hospital appointment in London. Thankfully managed to speak with the listings officer last week and she told me who the judge was going to be, well...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 11-01-2010
That's very good news about judicial continuity. O...
Added By Kat007 on 12-01-2010
That's what my solicitor and I thought good to kno...
Added By Kat007 on 14-01-2010
Ever wondered about devine intervention well it ha...

Subject: New to this but Hi ....
Posted By Bobby321 on 11-01-2010
Just looking for a bit of advice and your thoughts on my current situation.
In brief ..married 22 years, one child (16), house (Joint). Decided to seperate in September 09 with the intention of going to mediation to so...
Added By LazyLizzie on 11-01-2010
If the grandmother is not dead then the money won'...
Added By Kat007 on 13-01-2010
I won money on the lottery the other day and thoug...

Subject: Holidays...
Posted By keephappy1 on 08-01-2010
Hello all....
Hope for some advise and answers...
My ex H has hinted that he would like to take our 2 children, boy 4, girl 7 to the states for 2/3 weeks this year.
Thats where is ...
Added By evr on 08-01-2010
I would let them go and have a good time. It will...
Added By evr on 08-01-2010
Ooh, and plan something for yourself during that t...
Added By Kat007 on 08-01-2010
Here's my thoughts if he was just saying he wanted...
Added By LazyLizzie on 08-01-2010
The fact that his g/f is willing to combine a trip...
Added By Stuart on 08-01-2010
keephappy1, well done for not adopting the knee j...
Added By EnglishRose on 08-01-2010
I wish my ex had taken the children on holiday onc...
Added By keephappy1 on 10-01-2010
Thank you all.
The only thing that ...
Added By LazyLizzie on 13-01-2010
Keephappy, there is a bit of a difference between ...
Added By keephappy1 on 19-01-2010
LazyLizzie,
If my ex had his way I wont be ...

Subject: Back to reality ... Good while is lasted.
Posted By mrnoone on 03-01-2010
Hi,
I hope it's a Happy New Year for everyone as when the clocks tick into the next year, i just think about my situation. I don't think i'll ever comes to term with not living with my 4year old son and move ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-01-2010
I don't think anyone feels it is enough when the ...
Added By MrNoOne on 03-01-2010
Hey stidw, hope all is well.
Thanks...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-01-2010
Oh dear. Dealing with the finances is always diffi...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-01-2010
i know exactly how you feel mrnoone... really... I...
Added By why? on 04-01-2010
if i was you id send an email to your ex and her p...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 05-01-2010
my kids just dont talk to me about their mum at al...

Subject: I am absolutely devastated
Posted By Kat007 on 03-01-2010
I have just found out that man who for 10 months last year kept telling me he loves me wanted to start an affair and told me that he was unhappy and not sure about his relationship with np. And kept on and on trying to get in...
Added By LazyLizzie on 03-01-2010
Kat, I can see your point and understand you being...
Added By Kat007 on 03-01-2010
Thanks LL,
I did tell him I love hi...
Added By Teadrinker on 03-01-2010
I'm so sorry, Kat.
His behaviour s...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-01-2010
forget him... he's not worth the tears... dickhead...
Added By Kat007 on 04-01-2010
I have woken up today to swollen eyes Lovely.
Added By Suvla1915 on 04-01-2010
He says he loves you but he betrays you and hurts ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-01-2010
hear hear!
Added By Jellylegs on 04-01-2010
Kat - it will end only when you let it - when you ...
Added By why? on 04-01-2010
hi kat. i understand, although for me it had nothi...
Added By Kat007 on 05-01-2010
He has already done it to his new partner a couple...
Added By why? on 06-01-2010
hi kat. with regard your son. although you tell hi...
Added By Kat007 on 08-01-2010
Cheers why?
I have told them all th...

Subject: Christmas Day
Posted By Jools123 on 03-01-2010
Hi all,
Having read a few posts about NRP not being around for Christmas I thought I should share our scandalous situation with you. Now, as most are aware my daughter is in South Africa for an extended break b...
Added By EnglishRose on 03-01-2010
There are many many more men in the UK who refuse ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-01-2010
jools- he is trash... you are better off without h...
Added By why? on 04-01-2010
hello.
how utterly vile. he and his np soun...
Added By Jools123 on 05-01-2010
Thanks for the posts.
We have not t...

Subject: im slowly learning
Posted By why? on 01-01-2010
im slowly learning that i dont need to worry about some things as much as i have.
you will remember that i was upset and shocked at h for not wanting to see the children over christmas and choosing instead to go away o...
Added By Kat007 on 02-01-2010
however, lets not get carried away. im still not i...
Added By why? on 02-01-2010
hi kat.
yip. plenty of time til next year a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 02-01-2010
' because this will mean that i dont see them at a...
Added By Teadrinker on 03-01-2010
My ex also chose not to see our son at Christmas f...
Added By why? on 03-01-2010
hi. yes. i can see that now. i agree with obi howe...
Added By evr on 03-01-2010
Its just a day, and this gets easier once the chil...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 03-01-2010
I know I am a bit dumb- most coppers are ;-)
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 03-01-2010
again- another fall down with our legal system aro...
Added By EnglishRose on 03-01-2010
What can the RO do? nothing much. Children have no...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 03-01-2010
so wrong...
I like the 50-50% idea....
Added By EnglishRose on 03-01-2010
Tough... make them get used it, develop a culture ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 03-01-2010
I am on your side here ER... but it wont happen in...
Added By Teadrinker on 03-01-2010
I like the idea of 50-50 too and I'm not sure why ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-01-2010
The biggest obstacle to sharing care 50:50 after p...
Added By Teadrinker on 03-01-2010
Yes, I think (and I've posted this before lol) tha...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-01-2010
in my case the biggest obstacle was her... lol
Added By why? on 04-01-2010
fat chance of getting an effective, consistent 50/...
Added By EnglishRose on 06-01-2010
We did have 50/50 care of children for 19 years of...

Subject: 2010
Posted By Kat007 on 01-01-2010
A new decade, lets hope it brings us all some peace and quiet and for those away from their children too long more access.
2010.000.00 this is the amount of money i will end up paying my solicitor
...
Added By Suvla1915 on 01-01-2010
Happy New Year Kat, hope it's a good one for you a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 01-01-2010
2010 the amount in mega-hurts that my kids will su...
Added By Kat007 on 01-01-2010
I too am glad it's 2010,
Not only b...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-01-2010
Happy New Year everyone!
Added By why? on 01-01-2010
all the best for 2010.

Subject: Denied child access
Posted By SMP999 on 29-12-2009
Left the wife at the Weekend following a very physical bust up where SHE assaulted me by biting, punching and kicking following a heavy drinking session. I DID NOT instigate the assault NOR did I hit her, I just held her down...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 30-12-2009
I'm afraid you will not like the news. Your opti...
Added By Stuart on 30-12-2009
yep, system stinks.....
Very much one sided...
Added By why? on 30-12-2009
i unerstand what stuart means. i dont agree that i...
Added By Stuart on 31-12-2009
Hi Why?....
I refer to mums quite s...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 31-12-2009
stuart -you bad man- we dont say mummy here... its...
Added By evr on 31-12-2009
Well, to be strictly accurate its 90%, and of cour...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 01-01-2010
OPPS... did I say 98? typo...
Of co...

Subject: Merry Whatever!
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 25-12-2009
To all posters... Have a merry Xmas...
hope it gets better!
May the Force be with you all...

Subject: Divorce letter and no reply
Posted By tonyeby on 24-12-2009
Got a letter from spouse via court asking for divorce on ground that we have been living apart for 2yrs. what would happen if i ignore the court devorce letter?. I dont want to reply the letter.please what would happen?
Added By EnglishRose on 24-12-2009
Eventually after 5 years apart she can divorce you...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 24-12-2009
do you still have shared assets?
ge...
Added By tonyeby on 24-12-2009
no asset, nothing togather and she is not making a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 24-12-2009
well...
in that case should be quit...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 24-12-2009
She doesn't need to know where you are. Contact th...
Added By tonyeby on 26-12-2009
Thanks for the advise.my last question-- how do i ...
Added By tonyeby on 26-12-2009
Thanks for the advise.my last question-- how do i ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-12-2009
There should have been an Acknowledgment of Servic...
Added By tonyeby on 27-12-2009
thanks.no form came with it. I will look for a law...
Added By Kat007 on 27-12-2009
The D10 can be downloaded from www.hmcs.gov.uk alo...
Added By tonyeby on 27-12-2009
hello is there another name for form d10, cant fin...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-12-2009
Not all the forms are available on the HM Court Se...

Subject: Hello & Merry Christmas
Posted By Martin on 23-12-2009
Hi Gang,
Thought I'd join the crowd popping their heads around the door to offer seasons greetings!
A good year for me, very busy, no recession, not good prices but hey! bills are paid for another year.
M...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 23-12-2009
Now that's a coincidence. I was just thinking abou...
Added By Kat007 on 24-12-2009
Good to hear from you Martin and so pleased that l...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 24-12-2009
ahh martin...
one of my steppers is...
Added By london on 25-12-2009
Hello there and a very happy Christmas
I th...
Added By EnglishRose on 25-12-2009
Most who rush into it second time fail and 60% of ...
Added By skovby1 on 26-12-2009
Lovely to hear that things are going well Martin -...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 26-12-2009
cheery note ER... lol...

Subject: I am Hoping
Posted By Kat007 on 23-12-2009
As I woke at 4am this morning I was thinking of all of us who will be apart from our children this christmas, some of us have opted for this to keep life simple for our kids and some of us have had this forced upon us keeping...
Added By Jools123 on 23-12-2009
Hi Kat,
I truly hope that this lump...
Added By Kat007 on 23-12-2009
I hope the time will fly by for you Jools and you ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-12-2009
Me too... i hope its nothing serious... hope he ca...
Added By Kat007 on 23-12-2009
You would hope but I e-mailed and told him what ha...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 23-12-2009
Sorry kat. You seemed to have more than your fair...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-12-2009
heh... fat chance... of him contacting you ....
Added By Kat007 on 24-12-2009
No breakfast in bed honestly thats not right, alth...

Subject: ex in family home
Posted By margo wood on 22-12-2009
Any advice please, my ex and I have been separated for 15 months now - I left with the children after years of emotional abuse from him and hidden debts(his). He is still living in the 4 bed familt house and is insisting tha...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 22-12-2009
It sounds as though you need to start court procee...
Added By margo wood on 23-12-2009
Thanks, I've been trying to tread softly in an att...
Added By EnglishRose on 23-12-2009
If he doesn't want you home you could move back in...
Added By margo wood on 24-12-2009
I don't think I could stand to live in the same ho...
Added By EnglishRose on 24-12-2009
If he is going to be retired soon he can take on m...
Added By margo wood on 26-12-2009
Thanks, I like that one about renting out rooms - ...
Added By Stuart on 30-12-2009
Er, dont talk daft.
Renting out rooms is ne...
Added By Stuart on 30-12-2009
Meant to mention....
ER is right wh...

Subject: update
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 22-12-2009
spoke to the boys again... they are NOT going on holiday after all!!!
lol
it would seem that they were NEVER going...
she just said that to stop me taking her to court...
...
Added By Stuart on 22-12-2009
Obi, you are a bully.... leave that poor woman alo...
Added By Kat007 on 23-12-2009
Well well well thiink we knew this all along hones...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-12-2009
stuart- lol...
kat- yes... cheque w...
Added By Jools123 on 23-12-2009
Lying to you, well that's typical (it happens, we ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-12-2009
on a lighter note... got skype running on their PC...
Added By juggler on 23-12-2009
Oh, how spiteful. Not entirely unexpected though a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 24-12-2009
yes I suppose I should have guessed... I should ha...
Added By Kat007 on 24-12-2009
More positive attitude from you obi this is good t...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 24-12-2009
havent seen my boys for two weeks and wont see the...
Added By Kat007 on 25-12-2009
Merry Christmas my friend, be safe today thinking ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 27-12-2009
funny-no owl?
Added By Stuart on 31-12-2009
I think the Kiwi school of wit has closed for Xmas...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 31-12-2009
virtual turkey?
or...
...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 01-01-2010
hope she is ok... mind you... she does have a life...

Subject: Cheating ex
Posted By Soldheim on 20-12-2009
I am seeking some advice. The ex wife constantly failed to supply finincial information and ignoring court orders. We agreed a settlement before the final hearing but based on the little information she provided. It would ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 21-12-2009
Certainly if evidence comes to light of non disclo...

Subject: Oh he's really good
Posted By Kat007 on 20-12-2009
So having had rather a lot of snow lke many parts of this fair land of ours, we went out to play on friday morning good fun dump the child for being cheeky and hitting me on the head with a snow ball, he was hiding behind a c...
Added By juggler on 20-12-2009
It must be the time of year.....
Af...
Added By Kat007 on 22-12-2009
Juggler so sorry this is still happening to you an...
Added By why? on 22-12-2009
hi.
it sounds very much deliberate....
Added By Kat007 on 30-12-2009
Oh it happened again really he is pushing his luck...

Subject: Boo ...... MERRY CHRISTMAS
Posted By ray_of_sunshine on 18-12-2009
Hey people ….
Just popping my head in the door to wish you all yuletide greetings.
Who can believe that its 10 years ago that we were all contemplating the next millennium huh lol. The Y2K bug ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 18-12-2009
lol RAY!!!!
y2k chat a con that was...
Added By BFS on 21-12-2009
Ho ho bloody ho!
I remember it well Don. I ...
Added By Kat007 on 22-12-2009
Hi Ray and BFS,
Good to see your st...

Subject: Directions Hearing
Posted By Captain Oates on 18-12-2009
OK, so after the last post has pointed out, I am fairly stressed about this at the moment and after direction. So, I phoned the court today and spoke to the court manager who advised that my C2 application has been to a circu...
Added By Captain Oates on 18-12-2009
Should I withdraw my application? Can I? How do I?...
Added By Simes 2p on 18-12-2009
Capt,
Costs are only awarded when o...
Added By EnglishRose on 19-12-2009
Why didn't you turn up at a hearing? That;'s dread...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 21-12-2009
I cant believe this- I have empathy for oats-so-si...

Subject: Amazing
Posted By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
So what a shock I got today yet another unecessary letter that has been answered 3 times now by letter and in court but clearly he is not listening or able to bloody read. OMG
Ex has asked my solicitor for medi...
Added By Simes 2p on 16-12-2009
Kat,
What on earth is your Sol advi...
Added By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
High Simes,
My solicitor hasn't advised any...
Added By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
Sorry not HIGH Simes but Hi Simes then should be h...
Added By Simes 2p on 16-12-2009
Kat,
I just don't understand at all...
Added By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
I didn't think you were able to just ignore any le...
Added By Jools123 on 16-12-2009
Kat - I have to say, having been on this site for ...
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
Kat, you do not have to respond to any letters you...
Added By Kat007 on 17-12-2009
Thanks Guy's,
After re-reading your...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 17-12-2009
what else can you do?
good luck ki...
Added By Kat007 on 17-12-2009
Well I recieved the appointment today for the firs...

Subject: I've made the biggest mistake of my life, what now
Posted By hippychick91 on 15-12-2009
I recently remarried and very shortly afterwards realised I had made a big mistake. I'm totally at a loss of what to do and where I stand. The house we live in is mine. solely in my name and i pay all the bills etc. I hav...
Added By hippychick91 on 15-12-2009
I should add I have owned the house(mortgaged for ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-12-2009
Unfortunately you cannot divorce and no financial ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 15-12-2009
crap- i am reminded of my own sit... i owned my ow...
Added By hippychick91 on 15-12-2009
Thanks for that. I can see now how stupid I have ...
Added By Kat007 on 15-12-2009
Oh dear what an awful place to be right now, I am ...
Added By Jools123 on 15-12-2009
I'm also sorry that this is happening to you but I...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-12-2009
As you are married your H has rights to live in t...
Added By EnglishRose on 15-12-2009
This is counted as a short marriage. You will both...
Added By hippychick91 on 15-12-2009
i appreciate there are four people to consider her...
Added By LazyLizzie on 15-12-2009
Hippy, it may be that to end the marriage is the b...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-12-2009
We all make mistakes, after all we are only human....
Added By hippychick91 on 16-12-2009
Lazy Lizzie... we have known each other for 29 yea...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 16-12-2009
so to sum up...
your kids didnt lik...
Added By Jools123 on 16-12-2009
It looks to me like your husband is under severe s...
Added By Owl1 on 16-12-2009
Hippychick. I agree you have to put your kids firs...
Added By Simes 2p on 16-12-2009
Stids, not read it all, but wouldn't he have a cla...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 16-12-2009
Simes, the recent case was Smith v Smith. The CA ...
Added By hippychick91 on 16-12-2009
Hi Thanks for all your advice. I honestly do read...
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
I don't think you heartless hippychick. I agree yo...
Added By Kat007 on 17-12-2009
Time to pop to the solicitor,
Menta...
Added By EnglishRose on 17-12-2009
he's a total waste of space. Do what I say ab ove....
Added By hippychick91 on 18-12-2009
Hi ER, no like I said everything was already plann...
Added By EnglishRose on 19-12-2009
I think they must be made at least 6 weeks in adva...

Subject: Moving away...
Posted By Izza on 14-12-2009
Hi there,
I wonder if somebody could help and give some advice please.
I was divorced 4 years back and have a 7 yr old. Im the nrp. Had to go to court after the divorce to get a contact order organised ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-12-2009
The courts generally take the view that it is inap...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 14-12-2009
PSO- ASAP!
Added By Kat007 on 15-12-2009
Hi,
Sorry this has happened to you,...
Added By Jools123 on 15-12-2009
Why should your children have to suffer the extend...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-12-2009
Based on what has been said so far the probability...
Added By Izza on 15-12-2009
Thanks everyone for the comments.
I...
Added By Jools123 on 15-12-2009
No - she will change her mind. Its too late once s...
Added By Kat007 on 15-12-2009
Agree with Jools get this sorted sooner rather tha...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-12-2009
If you can come to an agreement between you it is ...

Subject: Someone sent this to me
Posted By Kat007 on 13-12-2009
Hi everyone,
Someone sent this to me via e-mail and when I read it as it is written about a mother but also read it from a father's perpective and wanted to share with all you Dad's and Mum's who are having problems re...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-12-2009
a bit trite- but i think it sums it up.
Added By Kat007 on 13-12-2009
Me neither especially when son has been told by GF...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-12-2009
yes- poor kids... thats the thing i hate the most....

Subject: What happened in court
Posted By juggler on 12-12-2009
Went to court last Thursday, the ex looking for more contact and for his new fiancee to be allowed to be present at contact. On the Monday (7th) my solicitor received a lengthy fax from his sol saying fiancee had stolen ex's ...
Added By evr on 12-12-2009
It doesn't look as though you have to do very much...
Added By Kat007 on 12-12-2009
Goodish news for you lovely well done, shame about...
Added By juggler on 14-12-2009
Well, its not really going according to what we ag...
Added By Kat007 on 15-12-2009
FFS,
Evidence Juggler get lots of e...
Added By juggler on 17-12-2009
Nothing untoward has happened since. He went to co...

Subject: Can anyone please advise?
Posted By mamamel on 11-12-2009
My boyfriend is currently going through divorce proceedings. He has 2 children aged 4 and 8 with his ex wife to be and is finding things difficult with regards to the access with his children.
Prior to his ex ...

Subject: Can anyone please advise?
Posted By mamamel on 11-12-2009
My boyfriend is currently going through divorce proceedings. He has 2 children aged 4 and 8 with his ex wife to be and is finding things difficult with regards to the access with his children.
Prior to his ex ...
Added By Stuart on 12-12-2009
Hi,
Sad to say that these sort of g...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-12-2009
funny- i have a feeling of deja-vue ...
Added By EnglishRose on 12-12-2009
The trouble is as soon as you turn to the courts i...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-12-2009
ER is sooo right...
if you can- mak...
Added By mamamel on 13-12-2009
Thank you for your replies, I myself would take th...
Added By EnglishRose on 15-12-2009
He's still going through divorce proceedings (I tr...

Subject: Captain Oates
Posted By polywoly on 11-12-2009
Hya, a few of you remember Oatsy. I am his girlfriend of one and half years. Oates is having a rough time still with contact re: ex. She reduced his contact to every other weekend one night. He then applied to cour...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 11-12-2009
It's rare for costs to be awarded in children case...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-12-2009
if oatsy deals with court and ex wifey in the same...
Added By polywoly on 11-12-2009
Thanks for the replies. Yes, the court has reduc...
Added By Simes 2p on 12-12-2009
Poly, I hate to say it, but, the approach taken by...
Added By polywoly on 12-12-2009
o.k. point taken
Added By Kat007 on 12-12-2009
Polywoly,
It's lovely to hear from ...
Added By Captain Oates on 12-12-2009
Hello. Well, we had a cafcass report which came ba...
Added By Captain Oates on 12-12-2009
There's a lot more to this. The court letter said ...
Added By polywoly on 12-12-2009
Kat, thanks for your post. No I don't go to cou...
Added By Kat007 on 12-12-2009
I agree polywoly,
Deffo put costs a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-12-2009
oatsy- i just hope you get to see your kids more.....
Added By Captain Oates on 12-12-2009
Cheers.

Subject: how is it possible to avoid 3rd trial?
Posted By why? on 10-12-2009
if h has not disclosed all information which would show his expenditure and has not fully answered questions put to him prior to the fdr and everyone appears to just be working on the information/figures he has given us then ...
Added By EnglishRose on 12-12-2009
You need to prove those figures wrong and in such ...

Subject: can he start proceedings
Posted By kate594 on 10-12-2009
My partners estranged wife began divorce proceedings in Feb this year, my partner received the paperwork and returned it to the court and he is not contesting it. Since then we are still waiting for her to send her affidavit ...
Added By Kat007 on 15-12-2009
I believe that if she hasn't signed the paperwork ...

Subject: Project at the Anna Freud Centre
Posted By Ms NY on 10-12-2009
My name is Natasha Fitzgerald-Yau and I am a graduate student at the Anna Freud Centre, University College London. I am conducting a study that will explore the effects of parental loss on the inner world and emotional adjust...

Subject: God it happens everywhere
Posted By Kat007 on 08-12-2009
Just had a call from my sister who is in tears her and husband have been having probs she kept it quiet and just informed me they had a massive row tonight he has stormed out she said she doesn't love him anymore and wants ou...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 08-12-2009
oh... your... god!!!
30 years... <...
Added By EnglishRose on 09-12-2009
First of all she needs to be told it's not her hou...
Added By Kat007 on 09-12-2009
Yeah she knows that ER as in joint names. He can n...
Added By Stuart on 10-12-2009
No chance that this is all a bit of a storm in a t...
Added By Stuart on 10-12-2009
Oh...just re-read my post...
I wasnt implyi...
Added By Kat007 on 10-12-2009
Hi stuart,
Bloody cheek unbalanced ...
Added By Suvla1915 on 10-12-2009
Tell her the reality of life on your own and about...
Added By why? on 10-12-2009
hi kat.
yes its happening everywher...
Added By EnglishRose on 12-12-2009
Well my parents stuck it out until they died in to...
Added By Kat007 on 14-12-2009
Well seems he is back and that they may give it an...

Subject: God it happens everywhere
Posted By Kat007 on 08-12-2009
Just had a call from my sister who is in tears her and husband have been having probs she kept it quiet and just informed me they had a massive row tonight he has stormed out she said she doesn't love him anymore and wants ou...

Subject: if you have a min simes- please.
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 07-12-2009
simes- here is the exact wording: how do you interpret it please?
'for one week each school Christmas Holiday, and in alternate years it shall be from 5.00pm on 24 December to 2 January, but for the purposes of...
Added By Simes 2p on 07-12-2009
Oscar Bravo,
The sentence doesn't m...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 07-12-2009
thanks- better advise from you and court staff the...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 07-12-2009
Normally the papers have to be served for 21 days ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 08-12-2009
its 80- but thank again- have form in my hand!
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 08-12-2009
I've just checked and according to the fees list E...
Added By Simes 2p on 08-12-2009
STIDSY, sometimes the left hand doesn't know what ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 08-12-2009
Yes I know the left hand doesn't always know what ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 08-12-2009
sidw dead on... its 40!!! the lady from court got...
Added By Owl1 on 08-12-2009
Obi as I understand it you had 24 December to 2 Ja...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 09-12-2009
yes owl- well done- nice big told you so- well fcu...
Added By Owl1 on 09-12-2009
Obi I don't feel at all smug.
I don...
Added By EnglishRose on 09-12-2009
There will come a point when these children are ol...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 10-12-2009
owl- yes they are... and she let slip that they ar...
Added By Owl1 on 10-12-2009
Good on you for listening to your kids Obi and mee...
Added By Kat007 on 10-12-2009
Isn't this horrible when these poor kids are stuck...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 10-12-2009
owl- no1 son has been bribed... with a holiday. No...
Added By Owl1 on 11-12-2009
Yes no 1 son has no doubt been bribed ( or offered...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-12-2009
or was it 'your father will not allow you to go on...
Added By Owl1 on 11-12-2009
" or was it 'your father will not allow you to go ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 11-12-2009
how does she know? err... I told her that if she s...
Added By Owl1 on 11-12-2009
Obi, the kids have not been defeated, son no 1 is ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 11-12-2009
why no court? because she has told no1 son it will...
Added By Simes 2p on 11-12-2009
if oatsy deals with court and ex wifey in the same...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-12-2009
not people simes- show me please any posts to back...
Added By Owl1 on 11-12-2009
Obi, of course you can be a parent over the phone ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-12-2009
NO!
being stopped from seeing your ...
Added By Owl1 on 11-12-2009
Obi, I am very satisfied that I am a complete pare...
Added By Stuart on 12-12-2009
"of course you can be a parent over the phone and ...
Added By Owl1 on 12-12-2009
No not ridiculous Stuart just stating mine and my ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-12-2009
the difference- owl- is ...
that sh...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-12-2009
grrrr...
what my ex is- is an abuse...
Added By Owl1 on 12-12-2009
Obi they are not coming for Christmas because you ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-12-2009
it says in the order-
'for one wee...
Added By Owl1 on 13-12-2009
I know what the order says Obi. However by agreein...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-12-2009
all true- but the real PROBLEM in this is her? yes...
Added By Owl1 on 13-12-2009
Obi my son does not resent me, our relationship ha...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-12-2009
firstly, thanks for the post- very detailed...
Added By Owl1 on 13-12-2009
Obi, your consellor may have expressed disbelief a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-12-2009
and if they do- and i did not see them - then what...
Added By Owl1 on 13-12-2009
Obi, you see your sons regularly. That has been go...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 13-12-2009
love it owl...
'Things are ...
Added By Owl1 on 13-12-2009
You can only change your own behaviour Obi, you ca...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 14-12-2009
'Is that the way you want to be for the rest of yo...
Added By Stuart on 14-12-2009
"Obviously your bond with your son has not got str...
Added By Stuart on 14-12-2009
Sorry...just found another gem....
...
Added By Owl1 on 14-12-2009
Stuart I accept it wouldn't work for you. My ex ca...
Added By Stuart on 14-12-2009
Hands on parenting down the phone or via skype eh?...
Added By Owl1 on 14-12-2009
Well its ridculous to you Stuart, but maybe that i...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 14-12-2009
I see where you are going owl- really- if you are ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 14-12-2009
also owl- how do you give you son a hug?
Added By Owl1 on 15-12-2009
You are perfectly entitled to feel whatever way yo...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 15-12-2009
not ego! i miss them!
lol- its diff...
Added By Owl1 on 15-12-2009
"You just let it go owl- i cant... my sons are too...
Added By Stuart on 15-12-2009
"I also asked my son what he needed from me. He sa...
Added By Owl1 on 16-12-2009
I was a hands on parent Stuart and still contune t...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 16-12-2009
your answers speak volumes to me owl... surprising...
Added By Owl1 on 16-12-2009
'I'd say my son has had more cuddles from his nrp ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 16-12-2009
i dont believe any such thing...
i...
Added By Stuart on 16-12-2009
"Like I say I would have spent far more time with ...
Added By Owl1 on 16-12-2009
Obi, I don't automatically think women stay at hom...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 16-12-2009
sorry owl- but i cant be held responsible for anyt...
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
Obi if you married a woman you hated at the time o...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 17-12-2009
t was all my fault then... I dont know why owl- b...
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
Being depressed does not mean you are off your tro...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 17-12-2009
I doubt schools lie to parents as they are scared ...
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
"she said exactly- 'we are going to sell it to you...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 17-12-2009
err... i am not the abuser- she was and is ...
Added By Stuart on 17-12-2009
Obi....save your breath.
Owl will contradi...
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
"Not at all Owl. Far from it, I just fail to see h...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 17-12-2009
as i say owl- you are now suggesting STRONGLY that...
Added By Owl1 on 18-12-2009
I am suggesting Obi, that her behaviour is that co...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 18-12-2009
you ARE a troll...
and you wont mak...
Added By Owl1 on 18-12-2009
Obi I belive you when you say your suffered abuse ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 18-12-2009
at least i dont demean an abused person like you d...
Added By Owl1 on 18-12-2009
I don't believe I have demeaned you Obi. Being abu...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 18-12-2009
bollocks...
Added By Stuart on 18-12-2009
Like I said, you are pretty well wasting your time...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 18-12-2009
Stuart- you are right...
sorry mate
Added By Owl1 on 18-12-2009
Stuart, I don't think my ideas on parenting are to...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 18-12-2009
'when a man tells a woman' you really have your h...
Added By Stuart on 18-12-2009
"When your ex- wife asks you to stop doing somethi...
Added By Owl1 on 19-12-2009
"you are easily offended..."
Obi I ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-12-2009
ahh... you are wrong- i DONT hate my ex wife- I ha...
Added By Owl1 on 19-12-2009
Obi even when I raged at my ex, albeit it very bri...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-12-2009
i did not give my consent to it... I had no choice...
Added By Suvla1915 on 19-12-2009
Almost as nasty as called some one a "nasty, spite...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-12-2009
well i calls 'em like i sees 'em...
...
Added By Owl1 on 19-12-2009
Lol Suvla thats about it. Round and round and roun...
Added By Owl1 on 19-12-2009
"e.g. you can be a great parent over the phone... ...
Added By Stuart on 19-12-2009
Owl, you dont believe that domestic violence towar...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-12-2009
'You seem to be raging because you feel a person y...
Added By Owl1 on 19-12-2009
"Owl, you dont believe that domestic violence towa...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 19-12-2009
'I never said you felt threatened by me Obi' ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 19-12-2009
i will still be calling every day to hear my sons....
Added By Owl1 on 20-12-2009
Lol Obi, lots of people have to work Christmas day...
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 20-12-2009
i am working 10-6pm xmas day... so i wont get lunc...
Added By Owl1 on 20-12-2009
Aah well Obi you can have a lovely tea instead ( o...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-12-2009
working...
touche...
...
Added By Owl1 on 20-12-2009
"your son cant make that comment- because- he isnt...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-12-2009
However he does not feel any emotional connection ...
Added By Owl1 on 20-12-2009
"However he does not feel any emotional connection...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-12-2009
you posted...
'He really thinks you...
Added By Owl1 on 21-12-2009
It wasn't a critic of your parenting skolls Obi, i...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 21-12-2009
lol... ok...
but you saying it is ...

Subject: Children troubles again
Posted By Kat007 on 06-12-2009
When is this going to end please someone tell me argh,
Yesterday I recieved a C100 from the ex no court aknowledgement on it nothing no hearing date etc.
So on it he states he is going for resid...
Added By Jools123 on 06-12-2009
Hi Kat, how old is your child?
Pers...
Added By Simes 2p on 06-12-2009
Kat, you need to attack this on the basis of unwar...
Added By Kat007 on 06-12-2009
Hi Simes,
I ask my sol about the un...
Added By Simes 2p on 07-12-2009
Kat, 5 times in 2 or 3 years is enough to block hi...
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Thanks simes,
Will ring cafcass tod...
Added By juggler on 07-12-2009
Hi, Kat.
I'm going to ask for a 91....
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Ok spoke with the court house and his application ...
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Solicitor said he didn't think a judge would agree...
Added By Tania on 07-12-2009
Hi not been here for a while. I'm not sure how muc...
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Thanks tania,
Over the last 3yrs we...
Added By Simes 2p on 08-12-2009
It isn't the number of times you go, its whether t...
Added By Kat007 on 08-12-2009
Thanks again simes for the very useful info, ...

Subject: Back to court :-(
Posted By juggler on 04-12-2009
Very disappointed that I am now off to court again next Thursday (5th or possibly 6th time this year). I really hoped nothing would happen until the New Year then at least we would know where we were regarding holiday contact...
Added By Kat007 on 05-12-2009
Hi Juggler,
From what i can underst...
Added By juggler on 05-12-2009
Thanks, Kat.
Its not the Christmas ...
Added By Stuart on 05-12-2009
Naa Jugs...... You just keep going.....lol
Added By juggler on 05-12-2009
I'll have an Earl Grey, please!
Added By juggler on 07-12-2009
Just had a phone call from my solicitor...
...
Added By Kat007 on 08-12-2009
OOOH this in one way is good news but in another q...
Added By juggler on 08-12-2009
Thanks, Kat.
As far as I know, cour...
Added By Kat007 on 10-12-2009
Oh don't screw the tax man coz he will been happy ...
Added By juggler on 11-12-2009
Thanks, Kat. Sorry, this is a cut and paste job bu...
Added By Kat007 on 17-12-2009
I hate to say this but given he lies about the GF ...

Subject: fdr
Posted By why? on 04-12-2009
can someone also please explain whether or not i could have adjourned the fdr based on non disclosure and unclear and contradicting disclosure provided by h. or am i correct in saying that only h can adjourn the fdr because h...
Added By Simes 2p on 04-12-2009
Why, the whole point is that if his non disclosure...
Added By why? on 04-12-2009
ok simes. so basically you are telling me that we ...
Added By Simes 2p on 04-12-2009
Why, no, at the final hearing both of you will be ...
Added By why? on 04-12-2009
or indeed. why did you spend almost £100,000 on h...
Added By Kat007 on 05-12-2009
I know this is really stressful for you why? as it...
Added By why? on 05-12-2009
hi kat,
not being funny here but i get no p...
Added By EnglishRose on 05-12-2009
If you agree things between you they can be agreed...
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
Why, if your solicitor has told you it is unlikely...
Added By why? on 05-12-2009
thanks owl. i will ask my solicitor and barrister ...
Added By Owl1 on 06-12-2009
Why I should add that the key bit of information t...
Added By EnglishRose on 06-12-2009
Yes, we married young, always had everything in j...
Added By why? on 06-12-2009
hi er.
yes we do have a sharholders agreeme...
Added By Owl1 on 06-12-2009
Why, It will take your sol some time to analyse th...
Added By Owl1 on 06-12-2009
"If there is no purchaser then the shares at reall...
Added By why? on 06-12-2009
thats useful advice owl thanks. i have tried to ge...
Added By Owl1 on 07-12-2009
Why, your SM payment will be based on his income a...
Added By why? on 07-12-2009
yes i understand. i find it annoying however that ...

Subject: Break through regarding Christmas
Posted By Jools123 on 04-12-2009
Hi all,
After several solicitors letters my ex has conceded some ground regarding my daughter traveling to South Africa over Christmas. I get daughter on both weekends before Christmas (11-13th)(18-20th) and bo...
Added By Kat007 on 04-12-2009
Yipee, This is good news Jools I am so thrilled fo...
Added By Jools123 on 04-12-2009
Thanks Kat - it is great news!
Yes,...
Added By Kat007 on 04-12-2009
I am so chuffed for you and what's £1500 (i know)...
Added By Jools123 on 04-12-2009
Kat - fairy costume, Dora DVDs, Marble Madness, Di...
Added By Owl1 on 04-12-2009
Good news Jools. enjoy!
I'm intrigu...
Added By Kat007 on 04-12-2009
Ah but then like me you have grandchildren and do ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-12-2009
nice news-good one...

Subject: fdr waste of time.
Posted By why? on 03-12-2009
hi.
im looking for good strong advise here. previous posts i mentioned that i suspected h was deliberately engineering a third trial because he had told a blatant lie accusing me of saying to him that i would not sttle...
Added By Simes 2p on 04-12-2009
Why, I won't go into details, because a lot of wha...
Added By Kat007 on 04-12-2009
I do agree with simes here,
The oth...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-12-2009
The point of the FDR is to try and reach agreement...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 04-12-2009
PS the costs of a FH and associated work can be an...
Added By why? on 04-12-2009
no opinion from judge other than that it was a sha...
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
So lots of opinions then from the Judge Why and ev...
Added By why? on 05-12-2009
hi owl.
id assume that if the judge...
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
No thats not the case Why. At the final hearing th...
Added By why? on 05-12-2009
i understand about income not being a bottomless p...
Added By Owl1 on 06-12-2009
It is about standard of living Why, the general ru...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 06-12-2009
OK, the judge has given lots to think about. Simes...
Added By why? on 06-12-2009
hi
regarding the judges opinion. it...

Subject: update
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 03-12-2009
text from the X... 'you are not having the boys this year for xmas...'
she has decided to take them to the snowdome!
I will have them for this weekend then nothing until jan 6th...
...
Added By Jools123 on 04-12-2009
Obi - I'm really sorry to hear this. I don't quite...
Added By Kat007 on 04-12-2009
Sorry DarthX has done what,
was yo...
Added By Owl1 on 04-12-2009
Obi, its simple really isn't it.
Yo...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 04-12-2009
order says- that basically the xmas holiday is in ...
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
Obi, if the order says you have the boys from 18th...
Added By Kat007 on 05-12-2009
I know right now it seems taking the higher ground...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 05-12-2009
I dont think i could ask simes- he thinks i am an ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 05-12-2009
we live month to month...
200 quid ...
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
Well do it this time Obi, don't just talk about it...
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
And I think you are missing the point of why you a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 05-12-2009
gee thanks mom...
we have cut back ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 05-12-2009
err... my role to correct her behave?
Added By Owl1 on 05-12-2009
Obi, the value is that you have a chance to get th...
Added By Simes 2p on 05-12-2009
Oscar Bravo,
'I dont think i could ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 06-12-2009
simes- for me 'enforcing' a civil order is a WASTE...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 06-12-2009
I know you mean well- and i am not upset with any ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 06-12-2009
F4J is disbanded. Too many bigots within brought ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 06-12-2009
simes- here is the exact wording: how do you inter...
Added By Owl1 on 06-12-2009
Obi If you seek to enforce a civil order, the resu...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 06-12-2009
i heard FFJ was kaput... I guess they just ran out...
Added By Owl1 on 06-12-2009
So it looks like you are going to go ahead and ap...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 06-12-2009
law without enforcement or consequences is useless...
Added By Owl1 on 07-12-2009
Obi young kids can cope without seeing a parent fo...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 07-12-2009
cope? mmm... deal with- more like.
...
Added By Owl1 on 07-12-2009
Obi, kids can be quite happy when separated from p...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 07-12-2009
I think you miss the point a little... the kids (u...
Added By Owl1 on 08-12-2009
Obi if your kids want to live with you and you are...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 08-12-2009
are you sure you are a solicitor?
r...
Added By Owl1 on 08-12-2009
Yep, I am quite sure I am a solicitor Obi.
...

Subject: Apology for previous post: please ignore it.
Posted By Zoe on 02-12-2009
I'm sorry for my last post. I didn't mean to offend and obviously did not research the site well enough before asking for help with my project.
Unfortunately there does not seem to be a way to delete the post, ...
Added By Suvla1915 on 02-12-2009
Don't feel bad Zoe, it's not your fault, but I can...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
Zoe, I apologise for my words. I was unreasonably ...
Added By Teadrinker on 02-12-2009
Zoe, I wasn't offended by what you wrote. Though I...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
Exactly my thoughts TD.
Added By Owl1 on 03-12-2009
Zoe. I found when I finally did get divorced about...
Added By LazyLizzie on 03-12-2009
Zoe
Whilst I am sure many on here share Stu...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 03-12-2009
as i only had the clothes on my back, living in a ...
Added By Simes 2p on 03-12-2009
Zoe, being a student myself, good on you for makin...
Added By Nancy on 04-12-2009
Zoe, I celebrated my divorce, although it was over...

Subject: Help inspire women to celebrate newfound freedom.
Posted By Zoe on 02-12-2009
Hi all,
I am a student making a documentary about women who throw divorce parties. As someone whose parents went through a long and very painful divorce, I understand that this will not apply universally- and h...
Added By Suvla1915 on 02-12-2009
A party was the last thing on my mind. Absolutely ...
Added By Suvla1915 on 02-12-2009
I might throw a housewarming party though, if and ...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
This is EXACTLY why I agree with the student loan ...
Added By Zoe on 02-12-2009
Thanks stuart, that's really helpful.
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
Zoe - I think you should go elsewhere. This site i...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
Thing is Zoe, you have come to a divorce website w...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
I want to know how it is these frigwit people are ...
Added By Zoe on 02-12-2009
I'm really sorry to have caused such offense. Genu...

Subject: And we have a result
Posted By Kat007 on 02-12-2009
After as you may or maynot have read below ex wrote a very damning letter against me and has shown he will do all possible to wreck the relationship I have with the kids etc etc. He was angry due to hearing outcome and used t...

Subject: Enforcing residency order
Posted By david1972 on 01-12-2009
I have applied for a residency order for my 7 year old twin girls. I was last in court on 22nd November when an order was made setting out contact times for my ex-wife. The order also included two conditions for this contac...
Added By Kat007 on 02-12-2009
You say it is written in the order that her partne...
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
I agree with Kat. Except you do need to have proof...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 02-12-2009
It really depends on the circumstances. Were the c...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
Why do you object to the partner being present?
Added By Kat007 on 02-12-2009
Valid question Stuart but maybe it is serious enou...
Added By david1972 on 02-12-2009
Thank you for your input everyone. I do not want ...
Added By Stuart on 03-12-2009
sounds like you have grounds to ask the court to l...
Added By why? on 03-12-2009
do you know any other parents at the school who ar...

Subject: How do non-resident parents deal with the time away from children
Posted By Jools123 on 01-12-2009
Hi all,
Another one from me.....
I am finding the time outside of contact very tough and was wondering how NRPs cope. I have that aching/emptiness feeling in my stomach for several days after say...
Added By Stuart on 01-12-2009
I agree with your partner. If you let it eat you u...
Added By Jools123 on 01-12-2009
Hi Stuart,
Yeah, I didn't think the...
Added By Owl1 on 01-12-2009
I agree with your partner Jools, counselling may b...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
"it just gets you locked in bitterness and express...
Added By Kat007 on 02-12-2009
ouch
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Stuart have you considered what it is really like ...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
Ra...ra....ra.....
Talking crap as ...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Lol Stuart you really are an angry man sometimes. ...
Added By Stuart on 03-12-2009
Err...you started the insults Owl....not me....
Added By Owl1 on 03-12-2009
No Stuart I said you expressed an angry emotion. A...
Added By Stuart on 03-12-2009
Oh I see....my mistake was it? lol
So, call...
Added By Owl1 on 03-12-2009
Stuart what's eating you at the moment? You are re...
Added By Stuart on 03-12-2009
Owl, I came here to respond to Jools and all I got...
Added By Owl1 on 03-12-2009
Stuart you did express angry emotions. Read your p...
Added By Stuart on 04-12-2009
Frankly Owl I couldnt give a hoot whether you are ...
Added By Owl1 on 04-12-2009
What situation regarding Jools's daughter Stuart?<...

Subject: and another one from me...its not turning out to be a good day
Posted By Jools123 on 29-11-2009
Hi,
I've just found out from my daughter that her mum is going to change her name.
Can she do this without my consent?
We were married when daughter was born.
However as I w...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-11-2009
If the parents of a child are married to each othe...
Added By Jools123 on 29-11-2009
Thanks for this.
But could she try ...
Added By Owl1 on 29-11-2009
Jools, there is a child's legal name and then ther...
Added By Jools123 on 29-11-2009
Owl - I suppose you're right regarding a name. Aft...
Added By Kat007 on 29-11-2009
Jool123,
Yes it is only a name I wo...
Added By Simes 2p on 30-11-2009
It is illegal to allow a child to be known by anot...
Added By Jools123 on 30-11-2009
Thanks all - At least this sounds like one instanc...
Added By Kat007 on 30-11-2009
I am not sure but I think you can it might be wort...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 30-11-2009
"Can I get my name put of the birth certificate wi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 30-11-2009
kat, if a couple were married at the time of the c...
Added By Stuart on 30-11-2009
Err, of course you can have your name added to the...
Added By Jools123 on 30-11-2009
Just to clear the situation.
I'm na...
Added By Kat007 on 30-11-2009
Right Jools,
As you are named on th...
Added By Owl1 on 30-11-2009
I don't think Jools' daughter having her mother's ...
Added By Jools123 on 30-11-2009
Reason she used her surname was that we split up d...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 30-11-2009
In England & Wales the legal position is that cons...
Added By Teadrinker on 01-12-2009
I would have thought the fairest answer would be f...
Added By Owl1 on 01-12-2009
STIDW I am not talking about formal name changes o...
Added By Owl1 on 01-12-2009
TD, I think for men often the issue of a surname a...
Added By Simes 2p on 01-12-2009
Owl, I know this name thing is a well trodden argu...
Added By Owl1 on 01-12-2009
"For a mother to change a childs name, it is not t...
Added By Stuart on 01-12-2009
LOL....I think you have missed the point TD...
Added By Teadrinker on 01-12-2009
Stuart, you've just made up the reason why the mot...
Added By Teadrinker on 01-12-2009
Sorry, pressed Send too soon.
Stua...
Added By Jools123 on 01-12-2009
TD - to be honest, my ex would try and change daug...
Added By evr on 01-12-2009
I don't get this. Didn't you say your daughter do...
Added By Jools123 on 01-12-2009
EVR - I don't want my daughter being named after a...
Added By Suvla1915 on 01-12-2009
My brother in law left his wife when his two child...
Added By Jools123 on 01-12-2009
Hi Suvla - this new man has no biological tie to m...
Added By evr on 01-12-2009
But Jools, she will have her mum's surname, becaus...
Added By Suvla1915 on 01-12-2009
My niece (ex-niece?) has her father's surname, my ...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Jools I wouldn't worry too much about correcting y...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
And Jools to add to what you said to evr most wome...
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
Owl - of course and that's because I want to alway...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Jools, the reason for the "get a grip" whats in a ...
Added By Stuart on 02-12-2009
Oh dear Jools.....you and your ex split during the...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Stuart, I live with one of my children, live close...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
He removed himself from his mother's life prior t...
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
Interesting Owl - you state that I removed myself ...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Jools I am not making any assumptions as I don't k...
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
you have actually (see below) - but hey this has g...
Added By evr on 02-12-2009
I agree with Owl. Whatever the circumstances you ...
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
evr - you really do seem to get the wrong end of t...
Added By Jools123 on 02-12-2009
wtf - I've re-read this and realised I'm getting d...
Added By evr on 02-12-2009
The marriage broke up Jools, so you must have left...
Added By Owl1 on 02-12-2009
Jools I have no need to know the circumstances of ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-12-2009
Changing a child surname is always contentious bec...
Added By Stuart on 03-12-2009
Jools, I dont blame you for withdrawing from this ...
Added By Stuart on 03-12-2009
Oh...meant to say, good advice from STIDW....
Added By Owl1 on 03-12-2009
Stuart who made the assumption Jools left his wife...
Added By why? on 03-12-2009
i think that to change a childs name as your own c...
Added By Stuart on 04-12-2009
Owl, have you got the hots for me or something?
Added By Owl1 on 04-12-2009
lol Stuart, rest assured you are definitely not my...

Subject: Its not right, and I doubt there is anything I can do about it.....
Posted By Jools123 on 29-11-2009
I have my daughter with me this weekend, we woke up this morning (after she wet the bed for the first time) and she said 'Daddy, I dont want to see you for longer because it means I cant play with or see William (her friend)'...
Added By EnglishRose on 29-11-2009
You've done very well. Parents' views differ on wh...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 29-11-2009
I think you need to be very wary of jumping to con...
Added By why? on 03-12-2009
you did good. i have h who manipulates children an...

Subject: help please
Posted By neverending on 27-11-2009
hello folks, I have been reading your posts for a long time and need help. My ex husband has remarried with step children and a baby on the way.
I told my 12 years duaghter off and she decided to go ...
Added By Stuart on 27-11-2009
When you say he has reduced the amount agreed in c...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-11-2009
Umm... a 12 year changing where they live just b...
Added By Stuart on 28-11-2009
On the face of what we have read, its not likely t...
Added By neverending on 28-11-2009
Thanks STDW for your informed input. I always enj...
Added By EnglishRose on 29-11-2009
12 is marginal. 13 is more likely but most contact...

Subject: And were off :)
Posted By Kat007 on 27-11-2009
So I waited and waited and it finally happened after two weeks of pent up frsutration on his part lol.
Plop a letter on the door mat from the ex. as you know he tells S about court etc etc S blames Mother for f...

Subject: What do I do now ??
Posted By Sarah B on 26-11-2009
Hi
I had a very frank discussion (well, screaming match) with my husband at the weekend. Told him I did not love him, I did not want to be married to him any more and wanted us to seperate. He is having none of it, s...
Added By Stuart on 26-11-2009
Err....not so easy to "serve papers" in order to m...
Added By LazyLizzie on 26-11-2009
I lived with my husband and two sons whilst I divo...
Added By Kat007 on 27-11-2009
I agree totally with the above posts good advice a...

Subject: Domestic Abuse...
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 25-11-2009
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8376943.stm
To be taught in schools...
I thought PM Browns line. 'violence against women and girls was "an obscenity"'.
True... but methinks he forgot...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-11-2009
http://www.familylore.co.uk/
On the...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 26-11-2009
so there IS a two tier system after all....
...
Added By Owl1 on 26-11-2009
I think Simes's point is that despite the governme...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 26-11-2009
shame they missed half of the equation eh?
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 27-11-2009
obi, I think you are missing the point that the la...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 28-11-2009
ok- fathers rights are a COMPLETELY sep issue than...

Subject: Poll
Posted By harry888 on 25-11-2009
I read the other day in the Telegraph online that a poll suggests up to 1/3rd of all children loose contact with one parent [usually the father ]. They made it into a debate. The main reasons given were the legal system, gr...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 25-11-2009
lol... yes....
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 25-11-2009
petrol... fire... WHOOOOF!!!!
Added By harry888 on 25-11-2009
Sorry - I really do NOT understand this. Are sayi...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 25-11-2009
Trouble is that apart from court data on the outco...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 26-11-2009
harry- yes... there is a problem... thankfully -no...
Added By Owl1 on 26-11-2009
Effective problem solving often means stepping asi...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 26-11-2009
effective problem solving - is IDENTIFYING the PRO...

Subject: Increasing Contact
Posted By Jools123 on 24-11-2009
Hello,
Could somebody please advise me on how I should go about getting extended contact through the courts?
Currently I have 9am on Saturday through to 5.30pm on Sunday on alternate weekends. I ...
Added By Kat007 on 24-11-2009
Hi Jools123,
OK you would like to i...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 25-11-2009
I agree with Kat, if you still have regular conta...
Added By Jools123 on 25-11-2009
Hi,
Thanks for the posts but....
Added By Simes 2p on 25-11-2009
C100. Dowload from HMCourts website.
Added By Jools123 on 25-11-2009
Hi Simes,
Allegations - you know he...
Added By harry888 on 25-11-2009
Sorry to but in. I made post above trying to unde...
Added By Jools123 on 25-11-2009
Sorry harry but your questions are dubious. If you...
Added By harry888 on 25-11-2009
Jools. I am one of those fathers who has two grea...
Added By harry888 on 25-11-2009
i also put up a website. www.childrenarenotpawns....
Added By Simes 2p on 25-11-2009
Harry, most men tend to go up against the legal sy...
Added By Jools123 on 25-11-2009
ok, sorry to hear your difficulties.
Added By harry888 on 25-11-2009
Simes/Jools
Simes - I agree with yo...
Added By Stuart on 25-11-2009
Look on the bright side, children get to the point...
Added By Jools123 on 25-11-2009
Harry - the system is all wrong for the reasons ou...
Added By Jools123 on 25-11-2009
Stuart - I really hope that happens with my daught...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-11-2009
Harry, not annoyed with you at all. Just the way ...
Added By harry888 on 25-11-2009
Simes
You are a divorce lawyer righ...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-11-2009
Harry, sorry, no I am not.
Join F...

Subject: F.A.O Simes
Posted By juggler on 20-11-2009
Please could you tell me what the following means:
Make false representation to make gain for self or another or cause loss to other/expose other to risk on xx/xx/08
Fraud Act 2006 s1 (2) (a) +s.2
...
Added By juggler on 20-11-2009
Ah, having had a re-read, I can see his solicitor ...
Added By Stuart on 20-11-2009
Jeez....I have to ask, why are you so interested i...
Added By juggler on 20-11-2009
Is your name Simes.....? :-D
Added By Stuart on 20-11-2009
Well clearly not....lol...
Just try...
Added By Simes 2p on 20-11-2009
Jugs,
You need the Court to order d...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 20-11-2009
I'm not Simes but in case he isn't about over the ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 20-11-2009
Sorry, crossed posts!
Added By juggler on 20-11-2009
Thanks, all.
Just to clarify, he ha...
Added By Simes 2p on 20-11-2009
Jugs, another possibility of fraud is that he fidd...
Added By juggler on 20-11-2009
Thanks, Simes.
The accompanying let...
Added By Simes 2p on 20-11-2009
Jugs,
His Sol is protecting his cli...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-11-2009
if the prosecution is impending- I dont think the ...
Added By juggler on 21-11-2009
Yes, I do understand the reasons behind not statin...
Added By EnglishRose on 21-11-2009
"police letter) says "Copies of incidents relating...
Added By Stuart on 23-11-2009
Can I ask why the interest?
If its ...
Added By Simes 2p on 23-11-2009
Stu, didn't we go through this same conversation l...
Added By Stuart on 23-11-2009
Yes, I do remember this.....but I have slept since...
Added By juggler on 23-11-2009
I would like to point out that Mr Jugs IS having c...
Added By juggler on 23-11-2009
P.S I wouldn't say I am doing any detective work. ...
Added By Stuart on 24-11-2009
So the court has told you to do all of this detect...
Added By evr on 24-11-2009
Stuart, surely this is a child protection issue in...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 24-11-2009
in my experience - social services don't always im...

Subject: Makes you wonder
Posted By Kat007 on 19-11-2009
So I should be surprised really butit does make me wonder,
Ex is so angry he lost in court that he has again taken to using our children as a weapon against me. Telling them Mum did this and she has taken all m...
Added By Owl1 on 19-11-2009
Kat, this is what you do.
You write...
Added By Simes 2p on 19-11-2009
Is it really a good idea to involve the children i...
Added By Owl1 on 19-11-2009
Simes I think its always a good idea to let childr...
Added By Simes 2p on 19-11-2009
Hoots, I had absolutely no idea of my parents econ...
Added By Owl1 on 19-11-2009
You may well be right Simes.
I have...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-11-2009
well the reason I am in financial hardship-ville i...
Added By Simes 2p on 19-11-2009
Hoots,
I think the best that we can...
Added By Kat007 on 19-11-2009
This has stirred some debate and some valid points...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 20-11-2009
In E&W divorcing spouses are under a duty to use i...
Added By Owl1 on 21-11-2009
Simes I wouldn't want to distract you from your le...
Added By Kat007 on 21-11-2009
Owl Australia or New Zealand?
Added By EnglishRose on 21-11-2009
Most clever children can understand the fact - lik...
Added By Owl1 on 21-11-2009
Kat - NZ, its not light in Aussie till 10pm at nig...
Added By Kat007 on 22-11-2009
Nice post Owl very clear and to the point and so s...
Added By Simes 2p on 23-11-2009
Kat, personally, I wouldn't give a toss about show...
Added By Kat007 on 23-11-2009
Ta simes,
I think I will slap that ...
Added By Kat007 on 27-11-2009
ANd it did see above post :)

Subject: children
Posted By why? on 17-11-2009
can anyone tell me if its possible to have an order set by the court to establish contact just during holidays?
we have a schedule which suits us both. apart from the usual let downs by h as per usual. (just as...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 17-11-2009
No adult is forced to see for children if they don...
Added By why? on 18-11-2009
yes. i realise all of this but just find it totall...
Added By Stuart on 18-11-2009
Why?....you are doing it again...dont allow your f...
Added By why? on 18-11-2009
hi stuart. i have the children this christmas as h...
Added By Owl1 on 18-11-2009
Why calm down and take a breath.
Ne...
Added By Stuart on 18-11-2009
I echo Owls final paragraph.....
I ...
Added By why? on 19-11-2009
hi guys. i do get what you are saying. he has his ...
Added By Owl1 on 19-11-2009
Why, I have found that children tend to be less wo...
Added By why? on 19-11-2009
hi owl. i do appreciate and recognise what you say...
Added By Stuart on 20-11-2009
What would happen if your ex moved a distance away...
Added By why? on 20-11-2009
hi stuart. it would dependon far he chose tomove. ...
Added By Stuart on 20-11-2009
Yes thats true....
But you still ne...
Added By Owl1 on 21-11-2009
"i never impose a decision on someone else that i ...
Added By why? on 21-11-2009
hi owl.
yes. i see your point regarding my ...
Added By Owl1 on 21-11-2009
Why I think you can say that you did "consider" yo...
Added By why? on 21-11-2009
hi owl. it boils down to this. i want to see the c...
Added By Owl1 on 21-11-2009
Why someone once said that assuming too much makes...
Added By why? on 21-11-2009
HI OWL. i didn't assume that all people from broke...
Added By Owl1 on 21-11-2009
"i think its fair to say that if a parent doesn't...
Added By Owl1 on 22-11-2009
And I should add Why that if anyone had suggested ...
Added By EnglishRose on 22-11-2009
Christmas is neither here nor there in my view bu...
Added By why? on 22-11-2009
hi owl. you made the point about your children enj...
Added By Owl1 on 22-11-2009
Why the children were bought up by both of us and ...
Added By why? on 23-11-2009
hi owl. i'm exhausted on the christmas thing.regar...
Added By Owl1 on 24-11-2009
Why who is stopping you getting paid employment if...
Added By why? on 24-11-2009
owl.i have no intentions to work until my youngest...
Added By Owl1 on 24-11-2009
Why life isn't fair. Is it fair that your h does n...
Added By why? on 24-11-2009
no owl. i wanted h to see the children regularly a...
Added By Stuart on 24-11-2009
Why?, your loss of career will be reflected in the...
Added By Owl1 on 25-11-2009
I think the thing you are going to have to accept ...
Added By why? on 25-11-2009
owl. all schedules were done at his request. any s...
Added By Owl1 on 26-11-2009
Why, why are you bothering with typing the schedul...
Added By why? on 26-11-2009
im sorry owl but its perfectly normal to have sche...
Added By Owl1 on 26-11-2009
Who says its perfectly normal to have schedules Wh...
Added By why? on 26-11-2009
yes i can appreciate all that you say. however, ye...
Added By Owl1 on 27-11-2009
Why, let me share my positive experiences as an nr...
Added By why? on 28-11-2009
i again can agree with you to a level. regarding t...
Added By Owl1 on 28-11-2009
why, I was emotionally abused by my ex and he rema...

Subject: Hopefully nearly there!
Posted By redchad on 15-11-2009
I was actually divorced 2 year in January but part of the consent order was 1) that i pay maintenance till the house is sold. 2) that a schedule of the contents be agreed and divided accordingly.
Now the proble...
Added By why? on 15-11-2009
i dont know the answer. however, i cant see why yo...
Added By Stuart on 15-11-2009
Why? is right....compare court costs with the valu...
Added By redchad on 16-11-2009
Thanks for that!
I am self represen...
Added By EnglishRose on 16-11-2009
My ex let me have virtually all the contents as I ...
Added By redchad on 16-11-2009
Thanks ER im not gonna let it go but my question i...
Added By Stuart on 16-11-2009
Yes, if your ex hasnt done everything as she shoul...
Added By redchad on 17-11-2009
All i want is what im entitled to!
Added By LazyLizzie on 17-11-2009
Red I understand how you feel. THe bad news is tha...

Subject: Court Tomorrow
Posted By Kat007 on 08-11-2009
So as you can imagine tomorrow is supposed to be the day that I come out of limbo note the words supposed to be. :(
It is the day that is supposed to decide whether the children and I will be able to rehouse ou...
Added By why? on 08-11-2009
good luck kat. do you have to sit in the same room...
Added By Kat007 on 09-11-2009
We will have to see the Judge together so in the s...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 09-11-2009
I can't remember where you are at and whether this...
Added By Kat007 on 10-11-2009
So the hearing was for ex to show cause to vary SM...
Added By why? on 10-11-2009
seems like things are going your way kat. for now....
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 10-11-2009
So he did get short shrift! Please don't feel gui...
Added By Kat007 on 10-11-2009
Thanks guy's.
I know this is his ma...
Added By Joyce. on 10-11-2009
Awww Kat - sorry you're having such a tough time. ...
Added By Kat007 on 11-11-2009
Thanks Joyce,
If I had been a compl...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-11-2009
ahh kat- your line 'If I had been a complete bitch...
Added By Kat007 on 11-11-2009
oh yes it certainly does obi, Sometime my dad says...
Added By Suvla1915 on 11-11-2009
Kat, your Dad sounds just like mine - he says to m...
Added By Kat007 on 12-11-2009
Thanks for the post sulva,
How are ...
Added By why? on 12-11-2009
hi kat.
i feel for you. i am going ...
Added By Kat007 on 13-11-2009
Thanks why?
Yes he will destroy all...
Added By EnglishRose on 14-11-2009
His current partner should nkow he will sleep arou...
Added By Kat007 on 15-11-2009
Well there is the £64k question ER,
...
Added By Kat007 on 15-11-2009
Also ER,
Why would his current part...
Added By why? on 15-11-2009
kat. the gf will blame you for his affairs no doub...
Added By Kat007 on 15-11-2009
Ha yes your probably right there Why? Everything i...
Added By Owl1 on 17-11-2009
Hi Kat
Good to read that the Court ...
Added By Kat007 on 18-11-2009
Ha Owl that is hillarious thanks for cheering me u...

Subject: Here I go AGAIN !!!!
Posted By SethWC on 07-11-2009
Cant believe Kat n others still on here - Anyway have asked no 3 for Divorce because I am sick of being the verbal punchbag - Today is day one, expect harder times ahead !!!!!
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 08-11-2009
Didn't Oscar Wilde say something along the lines t...
Added By SethWC on 08-11-2009
Did not loose any of them - let them loose !!!!
Added By Kat007 on 08-11-2009
Oh S**T Seth.
Yes still here lol an...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-11-2009
a 2nd marriage is a triumph of hope over experienc...

Subject: More silliness
Posted By juggler on 06-11-2009
Being taken back to court in a fortnight... As a quick update, this year the ex has taken me to court 5 times to get more contact with the children and to have his new girlfriend present at that contact. 5 times the judge has...
Added By Simes 2p on 06-11-2009
Jugs, Your sol should be asking for an order to th...
Added By juggler on 06-11-2009
Hi, Simes.
Is the 91.14 order somet...
Added By juggler on 06-11-2009
Typo - next COUNTY, not next COUNTRY, he's not gon...
Added By Simes 2p on 06-11-2009
Jugs,
Yes, 91.14 is to stop a vexat...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-11-2009
seen one in action - it works a treat...
Added By juggler on 11-11-2009
Just wondering how to suggest a 91.14 to my solici...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 12-11-2009
easy- just say...
'can I enquire if...
Added By juggler on 12-11-2009
She is very good, I'm always worried about upsetti...
Added By Simes 2p on 13-11-2009
Jugs,
Sometimes, it is better to no...

Subject: Costs in divorce
Posted By Bubbles36 on 05-11-2009
Hi everyone
I have today received notification the Judge will grant me a divorce and he is to pay costs with my first court date. I initially saw a solicitor who sent him out a letter and I got charged £120 f...
Added By Stuart on 06-11-2009
Hi.
All I did was wrote a letter to...
Added By Bubbles36 on 06-11-2009
Hi Stuart
Thanks for replying... w...
Added By Stuart on 06-11-2009
Hiya again,
Im assuming you dont ac...
Added By Bubbles36 on 07-11-2009
Hi Stuart
No I haven't got the orde...

Subject: Costs in divorce
Posted By Bubbles36 on 05-11-2009
Hi everyone
I have today received notification the Judge will grant me a divorce and he is to pay costs with my first court date. I initially saw a solicitor who sent him out a letter and I got charged £120 f...

Subject: consent order
Posted By dobsy on 05-11-2009
Hi Can any help?? I am currently part way through a divorce i am the respondent and have the decree nisi however my wife has'nt applied for the absolute it has been approx 5 months so i can apply for it, can you tell me if i ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 05-11-2009
When the respondent applies for the absolute there...

Subject: Bullying
Posted By pixiehelper on 05-11-2009
My parnters was bullied by his wife for many years she has slowly took advantage of his financial position and took money from him and invested it into a business she was helping her grown up chidren financially to survive an...
Added By Owl1 on 05-11-2009
Well pixiehelper, first of all how can a wife take...
Added By pixiehelper on 05-11-2009
Its both their money but she will sit on the divor...
Added By Kat007 on 05-11-2009
tit for tat dirvoce on it's way then. I would just...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 05-11-2009
I don't understand what you mean when you say the ...

Subject: ulcers...
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 02-11-2009
good ol' doc...
she tells me i am on the way to getting an ulcer...
I wonder why...
will keep you updated- but for now i am on new meds and they are changing my shift pattern to ...
Added By Kat007 on 02-11-2009
Well hope you get the Ulcer under control. Not too...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 11-11-2009
yup- medication works... very well...

Subject: Help! Help! What do I do?
Posted By Jools123 on 01-11-2009
Please help me. I have spent the last 30 mins in tears after dropping off my 3.5 year daughter (M) from our fortnightly contact.
I was handed the following sheet of paper reading "Dear Julian, M will be visitin...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 01-11-2009
What are the terms of the order in relation to hol...
Added By Jools123 on 02-11-2009
The order doesn't mention holidays.
...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 02-11-2009
yes- but that would be a reasonable person Jools.....
Added By Jools123 on 02-11-2009
Talked to solicitor and being called tomorrow....<...
Added By LazyLizzie on 02-11-2009
Jools, this may not help but i thought I would say...
Added By Kat007 on 02-11-2009
Horrible, horrible and As hard as this will be not...
Added By Jools123 on 03-11-2009
Thanks all for advice.
Unfortunatel...
Added By Simes 2p on 03-11-2009
Jools,
Your Sol should have given y...
Added By Jools123 on 03-11-2009
Solicitor has said that she will write to her as s...
Added By Stuart on 03-11-2009
It might not be much consolation but for all those...
Added By Jools123 on 04-11-2009
I really do hope that is the case.
...
Added By Owl1 on 04-11-2009
Jools I just want to say that this is hard for you...
Added By why? on 04-11-2009
hi.
i have to say as a pwc that i f...
Added By Jools123 on 04-11-2009
Hi, thank you for your words.
To be...
Added By Owl1 on 04-11-2009
Your solicitor if she has any experience in Family...
Added By Jools123 on 05-11-2009
I think my solicitor was stating that my ex should...
Added By Owl1 on 05-11-2009
aagh well Jools your ex will truely believe that s...
Added By Jools123 on 05-11-2009
It is...
Just to add....I only know...
Added By Owl1 on 05-11-2009
Jools the effect of the Hague Convention is that i...

Subject: Scottish divorce - free offer
Posted By Bruce (Scotland) on 24-10-2009
I am a Scottish Solicitor and in the process of considering whether or not to offer a new Scottish divorce service. It is for those with children under 16 who have agreed everything with their husband or wife.
...

Subject: Quick question regarding a Tenancy
Posted By Kat007 on 22-10-2009
So I ask.
If ex is guarantor for our D on her rented property would he also be allowed to be guarantor for me. Can he be guarator for both of us?
Added By LazyLizzie on 25-10-2009
Why would you want your ex as guarantor?
Added By Kat007 on 25-10-2009
Hi LL,
Ah it doesn't work like tha...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 02-11-2009
lizzie is right- i would rather have a terrorist a...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 02-11-2009
dont give this person control over you again!
Added By Owl1 on 03-11-2009
Kat, by having your ex as guarantor you actually h...
Added By Kat007 on 03-11-2009
Cheers owl this was my thinking see I knew I wasn'...
Added By Owl1 on 04-11-2009
Its very stressful Kat. In your shoes I'm not sure...
Added By Kat007 on 04-11-2009
Well it get's worse the buyers are now pushing for...
Added By Suvla1915 on 04-11-2009
No clues I'm afraid, but I just wanted to offer my...

Subject: Father threatening court again - where do we stand?
Posted By Jools123 on 22-10-2009
Firstly I would like to point out that my partner and I have a child each. Her child (13) lives with us and my child lives with her mum (4). I have gone to court to get access and see my daughter every other weekend sat 9am t...
Added By Kat007 on 22-10-2009
Jools123,
Firstly may I say and sur...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 23-10-2009
Sorry about your sad news, the loss of children is...
Added By Jools123 on 23-10-2009
Thank you so much for you kind words. Its been a t...
Added By Kat007 on 23-10-2009
OMG Jools123,
Well what a complete ...
Added By Jools123 on 23-10-2009
Hi Kat,
You've hit the nail on the ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-10-2009
sorry to hear about this jools... agree with kat a...
Added By Kat007 on 24-10-2009
The mans a joke,
My son is under we...
Added By why? on 28-10-2009
its amazing. i am always surprised at just how man...

Subject: Quick divorce in scotland
Posted By afa2009 on 20-10-2009
Is it true that the 2-year separation condition is bypassed in scotland or is not a requirement in scotland?
If a separating couple live in england, can they file for divorce in scotland to speed up the process...
Added By Kat007 on 20-10-2009
on my understanding you can only file for divorce ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 20-10-2009
You can only divorce in Scotland if you are eligib...
Added By Bruce (Scotland) on 24-10-2009
The Scottish residence criteria can be found at ht...
Added By Daniel Plata on 31-10-2009
Online divorce companies claim that they are quick...
Added By afa2009 on 01-11-2009
I thank you all for your contributions.....I noted...

Subject: Its a farce (part 45869695)
Posted By juggler on 19-10-2009
Just thought I would update how court went...
The ex had taken me to court (strange how I've never taken HIM to court yet it was our 5th time there this year). He wanted more contact with the boys and his girlf...
Added By juggler on 19-10-2009
Forgot this bit - the ex's solicitor has said the ...
Added By Kat007 on 19-10-2009
Oh juggler,
You can only do what yo...
Added By why? on 21-10-2009
i dont quite understand. i thought he wanted more ...
Added By juggler on 22-10-2009
Yes, he asked for more contact (weekends including...
Added By why? on 28-10-2009
well there you go. if his girlfriend cant go a few...
Added By juggler on 02-11-2009
We're back in court on November 16th :-( Very disa...

Subject: update
Posted By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-10-2009
hi all...
just an update...
No1 son in 'big school' (he has only been there for this term and Darth X has made complaints about the staff already calling them racist!)
No2 son at d...
Added By Kat007 on 19-10-2009
Hi Obi,
Wow lots of changes :)
Added By Stuart on 21-10-2009
Hi Obi....
Just need to keep duckin...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-10-2009
ahh... didnt explain that too well...
Added By Stuart on 24-10-2009
Back in uniform aint that bad.....
You get ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 24-10-2009
possibly- I was surprised it fitted...
Added By Kat007 on 25-10-2009
Ah OBI,
Uniform Lovely nothing like...
Added By Stuart on 26-10-2009
From my experience, albeit not quite as long as yo...

Subject: Why oh why
Posted By Kat007 on 18-10-2009
I am astounded yes I shouldn't be but I am and again the person hurting is our D.
She is 16 has her friends of course, arranges to spend time with Dad he then cancels she arranges again and he cancels this has ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-10-2009
as Freud once remarked- 'sometimes a cake is just ...
Added By Kat007 on 19-10-2009
yes he is a jerk.
I have stopped ju...
Added By Chirpy on 19-10-2009
I have been through similar with my ex h. When he ...
Added By Kat007 on 20-10-2009
Thanks chirpy,
Yes we do always end...
Added By why? on 21-10-2009
hi kat.
its crap. i hate some of wh...

Subject: h throws another non susrprise!
Posted By why? on 15-10-2009
i guessed over a month ago from comments made by my 6 year old that h's gf was most probably pregnant. h sends text last weekend telling me the predicted news. he wants to tell children. i suggested he wait since she is only ...
Added By Stuart on 16-10-2009
Hi,
As hard as it is I would try no...
Added By why? on 16-10-2009
phew stuart. you've had your fare share too then.<...
Added By Stuart on 17-10-2009
You could watch this space.....or just let it all ...
Added By juggler on 19-10-2009
What is it about rings?!
When I lef...
Added By why? on 19-10-2009
tee hee hee.
yip. h turned up this morning ...

Subject: Just wanted to say hi
Posted By tilly31 on 14-10-2009
Hello everyone its been a while since I was here as I needed a period of time to cme to terms with everything that happened in the last 3.5 years of separation, divorce and residency matters.
All is quiet here ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 14-10-2009
Great to hear from you again. It gets so much easi...
Added By Owl1 on 15-10-2009
Thats so true about acceptance setting in STIDW. <...
Added By Kat007 on 16-10-2009
HI tills,
So good to hear from you ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-10-2009
hi tilly... nice to hear you feel better about thi...
Added By Owl1 on 19-10-2009
What years lost Obi? I don't feel I have lost any ...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-10-2009
the years lost to spiteful, selfish people that se...
Added By Owl1 on 20-10-2009
Its up to you if you want to give them those years...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-10-2009
if a tree falls in a forest and noone hears does i...
Added By Joyce. on 20-10-2009
dum de dah etc etc etc.
Added By Owl1 on 21-10-2009
Obi you can choose to let the facts destroy you or...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 22-10-2009
still as funny as ever Joyce...
Owl...
Added By Owl1 on 22-10-2009
I am not a robot either Obi. I feel the whole rang...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-10-2009
I see what you are saying- however, I just don't a...
Added By Owl1 on 23-10-2009
I think it is in the range of a normal human to no...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 23-10-2009
As I indicated above- we just need to agree to dis...
Added By Owl1 on 23-10-2009
I agree Obi. I think the essential difference betw...

Subject: How do I get out of this marraige?
Posted By Sarah B on 12-10-2009
Never posted on here before, desperate for advice/support:
Been married 9 years with 6 year old son. I've been unhappy for many years, my husband has been aggressive with violent tendancies, treated me like s**t and b...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 12-10-2009
Who has been the main carer of your child during t...
Added By Stuart on 13-10-2009
How do you go to work if he doesnt let you leave?<...
Added By juggler on 13-10-2009
I went through a rather similar experience 5 years...
Added By Stuart on 14-10-2009
Perhaps Im just a tad stupid but if things are lik...
Added By Owl1 on 15-10-2009
You are not a tad stupid Stuart, just a little ign...
Added By juggler on 15-10-2009
Its not a bad idea, Stuart, but I'm all for keepin...
Added By Stuart on 15-10-2009
"Go around and arrest the perpetrator for assault ...
Added By Nicola on 15-10-2009
Hi Sarah.
First, let me say, I know exactly...
Added By Stuart on 16-10-2009
I meant to say previously, a dear friend of mine w...
Added By Owl1 on 17-10-2009
Good news for your friend Stu but even then she to...
Added By Stuart on 18-10-2009
My friend didnt stay with her ex out of fear, she ...
Added By Owl1 on 18-10-2009
Yes but that does not mean the hubby was afraid of...
Added By Stuart on 18-10-2009
She was too afraid of what would happen to her ex ...
Added By Owl1 on 18-10-2009
So she was the one afraid not him Stuart and it wa...
Added By Stuart on 18-10-2009
Oh ok Owl...... clearly you know my friend far bet...
Added By Owl1 on 19-10-2009
No I don't know your friend better than you Stuart...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-10-2009
lol nothing changes...
Added By Owl1 on 20-10-2009
Perhaps Obi having been in a similar predicament y...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-10-2009
Report him to the Police.
Get him removed f...
Added By Owl1 on 20-10-2009
Its sad Obi you feel like a chump. Thats not somet...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 20-10-2009
that i took that rubbish off her?
i...
Added By juggler on 20-10-2009
Oh, I still feel stupid for marrying my ex (althou...
Added By Owl1 on 21-10-2009
Don't beat yourself up about it Obi and Juggler.
Added By why? on 21-10-2009
abuse can also be very subtle. its the daily or we...
Added By Stuart on 22-10-2009
Ok owl....I will give in and answer you one last t...
Added By Owl1 on 22-10-2009
Stuart, I 'd be afraid of someone who beat me whil...
Added By Stuart on 22-10-2009
Ok....

Subject: Finding a home is really hard
Posted By Kat007 on 10-10-2009
So I have been looking and looking and looking for somewhere for me and the kids to live and there is nothing around. All the agents have a list of my requirements and are soing all they can to find something for me. I have n...
Added By Owl1 on 11-10-2009
Kat I don't know the rental market and rules in th...
Added By LazyLizzie on 11-10-2009
I am with Owl on this one. You are going to have t...
Added By Kat007 on 12-10-2009
I agree with all you say above regarding moving on...
Added By LazyLizzie on 12-10-2009
Kat - you are right that you can both expect the o...
Added By Owl1 on 13-10-2009
Kat, just leave your conveyancing sol to work thro...
Added By Kat007 on 14-10-2009
Cheers owl for the kind words.
Yep ...
Added By Owl1 on 15-10-2009
Kat, if he can't get a loan approved to meet the n...
Added By Kat007 on 15-10-2009
Ah sorry owl I was not very clear, the court order...
Added By Owl1 on 15-10-2009
Kat why has your sol not sought to enforce the ord...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 15-10-2009
Spouse maintenance can be enforced and the respond...
Added By Kat007 on 15-10-2009
Stids thanks for that advice.
The h...
Added By obiwan_kenobi_again on 19-10-2009
whilst i should always recommend that court action...
Added By Owl1 on 20-10-2009
Kat the good news in your post above is that if th...
Added By Kat007 on 20-10-2009
I wonder though whether now she has found out that...

Subject: Finding a Solicitor (Derby)
Posted By pricey on 10-10-2009
Hi guys
This is my first post and I'm afraid there may be many more as me and my wife are going to be talking about starting with divorce proceeding very soon.
I have been recommended a good sol in Nott...
Added By Kat007 on 10-10-2009
Pop down to your local CAB and they should have a ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 10-10-2009
It is a good idea to have a solicitor local to the...
Added By pricey on 10-10-2009
Thanks Kat007 and sometimesitdoesn'twork. Apprecia...

Subject: Implications of Selling the House before Divorce
Posted By rashadjee on 07-10-2009
Hi Friends, Just wanted to know if I sell my house to my brother for the outstanding mortgae of around £40,000, before I get a divorce and before my wife was to find out, where do I stand legally? The house is worth around ...
Added By Kat007 on 08-10-2009
OOH don't do it.
Info is the house ...
Added By rashadjee on 08-10-2009
The house is not in joint names and the marriage i...
Added By Simes 2p on 08-10-2009
Yes. Don't do it.
Added By Suvla1915 on 08-10-2009
I thoight you were a woman rashadjee. I'm sure you...
Added By Stuart on 08-10-2009
How thick are you Rash??
Of course ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 09-10-2009
The court can set aside dispositions intended to r...
Added By why? on 15-10-2009
i can see why your marriage didn't work. you sound...

Subject: Message of hope / Emotional support
Posted By BobH on 07-10-2009
Hi All,
There seems to be plenty of support and advice available on legal and financial matters but very little help to cope with the emotional trauma of divorce. We deal with the practicalities while inside an...

Subject: house stuff
Posted By Kat007 on 01-10-2009
So house sold subject to contract, nothing signed and have had legal advice not to sign anything until,
1. I have secured a property for my children and myself which is turning out to be impossible, no rental p...
Added By Tania on 02-10-2009
Hi kate I was in a similar situ a few years ago-un...
Added By Kat007 on 04-10-2009
Thanks Tania,
I have written to the...

Subject: Should I call it a day?
Posted By Chirpy on 26-09-2009
Where do I begin. Been seperated for nearly 5 years, divorce finally through July this year :) Got three children 17, 15, and 6. My ex had an affair and moved in with gf, had no contact wth the children for 2 years. Contact t...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-09-2009
You can't change other people's behaviour, you are...
Added By Kat007 on 02-10-2009
another great post by stids,
Chirpy...
Added By Chirpy on 03-10-2009
Thanks for your replys. It is always nice to get s...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-10-2009
It sounds as though you are doing all the right th...

Subject: Need advice -
Posted By Nicola on 26-09-2009
Hi, I really could do with some advice. My x has picked up our daughter from school for the first time and he was going to return her that day. However, that was yesterday. He still has her but tonight hes called and shes cry...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-09-2009
I don't think there is very much you can do just ...
Added By Nicola on 26-09-2009
thanks so much. Doing best not to let it worry me,...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-09-2009
I forgot to mention there is a court application f...
Added By why? on 28-09-2009
im not sure that id wait til next monday. thats a ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 28-09-2009
It's important to deal with these types of applica...
Added By why? on 29-09-2009
ah! silly me.

Subject: This is descending into a farce :-(
Posted By juggler on 25-09-2009
I found out yesterday that the ex went to court on Wednesday. Not for any of the 4 allegations I already knew about...
He was ordered to provide a CRB check and his complete police files by 21st July. He has JU...
Added By Stuart on 25-09-2009
How on earth do you know all of the details of the...
Added By juggler on 25-09-2009
I met the woman in question.
Added By juggler on 25-09-2009
Sorry, was interrupted there.
Stuar...
Added By Stuart on 25-09-2009
Well actually not everyone was sympathetic!! ...
Added By juggler on 25-09-2009
You would think by now I would know he has a devio...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-09-2009
Stuart has a point, it's important to stand back a...
Added By Simes 2p on 26-09-2009
Jugs,
When he is charged with an of...
Added By juggler on 26-09-2009
Yes, a bit of distance from him would be good. Eas...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 26-09-2009
False allegations are annoying but courts look at ...
Added By juggler on 26-09-2009
I don't know why, but I had presumed his criminal ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 28-09-2009
Criminal proceedings are only relevant in children...
Added By Simes 2p on 28-09-2009
Or, criminal propceedings can be used to show that...
Added By juggler on 28-09-2009
Thanks for the replies.
Yes, this i...
Added By Stuart on 28-09-2009
Hang on....so many people tell fibs in court....
Added By juggler on 28-09-2009
Well, the ex's fibs have never been used again him...
Added By Stuart on 28-09-2009
And I would be surprised if they ever are!!
...
Added By why? on 28-09-2009
hi.
i totally sympathise with you. my h is ...
Added By juggler on 28-09-2009
Thanks, Why.
Stuart, as I said a fe...
Added By Stuart on 29-09-2009
Err....for the record Im not a policeman....used t...
Added By juggler on 29-09-2009
Oh, I don't know where I got that from then! :-S

Subject: Email Surveillance & Password Recovery Service
Posted By netgrp on 24-09-2009
Have you recently wondered if your spouse is cheating on you?
Do you need Marital Infidelity Evidence?
Do you see Signs of Infidelity?
We are a team of experienced computer professionals from US,...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 24-09-2009
Hacking and arranging to hack is a criminal offen...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-09-2009
Aiding and Abetting is also a crime.
...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-09-2009
Gordon Brown is a twit
Added By Simes 2p on 25-09-2009
No, I said a silly message, idiots. Have another ...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-09-2009
Netgroup surveillance are a bunch of chancers.
Added By Simes 2p on 25-09-2009
Hey, clever. You've done it. You passed the test...
Added By Stuart on 25-09-2009
Why do the owners of this site allow such adverts?...
Added By Suvla1915 on 27-09-2009
Trouble is, anyone tempted may find that they pay ...

Subject: information needed.
Posted By mitmop on 22-09-2009
Hello all. Its been a long long time that I have been on this site. I dont know if sims is still on as he helped me a lot. Anyway a few years ago i won custody of my 3 children and being a Dad that was quite an achievment ...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 24-09-2009
The problem is that at 14 your D's views will carr...
Added By Simes 2p on 25-09-2009
Mitmop,
This isn't an issue you can...
Added By mitmop on 27-09-2009
Ok thanks for the replies. I am quite shocked at ...
Added By why? on 28-09-2009
im not surprised at your daughter running off etc....
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 03-10-2009
I would try to keep in indirect contact through em...
Added By EnglishRose on 03-10-2009
So she's just started her GCSE year. You need to b...
Added By mitmop on 17-10-2009
well its been a few weeks now and i havent heard f...

Subject: so we sorted it hmm(follow on from thread below)
Posted By Kat007 on 21-09-2009
Well thats what I thought.
So had a chat with our s at the suggestion of the ex and sorted everything to S's satisfaction e-mailed the ex to let him know the arrangements that he said our S wanted and still he...
Added By why? on 28-09-2009
just make sure that all your responses are calm an...

Subject: Ex's girlfriend.....
Posted By keephappy1 on 20-09-2009
I have received rather unpleasent emails form my ex's girlfriend.
And i'm at the point of not knowing what to do any more.
I have not resonded to these emails, as I know thats what she wants.
She...
Added By Kat007 on 21-09-2009
hi keephappy,
Wello done you for no...
Added By Stuart on 21-09-2009
Hi...
You are not alone. Well done ...
Added By Kat007 on 21-09-2009
might be sweeping but most of the time very true. ...
Added By Stuart on 22-09-2009
Thank ya Kat....lol...x
Added By keephappy1 on 23-09-2009
Thank you both.
The children are a ...
Added By Kat007 on 25-09-2009
You are doing all you can to maintain contact for ...
Added By Stuart on 25-09-2009
If he wont talk to you then you cant force him too...
Added By Suvla1915 on 27-09-2009
Keephappy, he doesn't want to speak to you because...
Added By Stuart on 27-09-2009
A very good post Suvla....
Just wo...
Added By Suvla1915 on 30-09-2009
Oh yes...
Added By keephappy1 on 01-10-2009
Thank you Suvla.
The extract is so ...

Subject: Ex Is at it again
Posted By Kat007 on 20-09-2009
As you are aware I was granted custody of the kids this year due to major problems at the ex's house, I managed to sort contact out, got the kids and dad's back together everything running smoothly until today he has e-amiled...
Added By why? on 28-09-2009
of course he thinks you are stupid. ex's tend to r...

Subject: Hols and more...
Posted By BFS on 18-09-2009
Re last weeks holiday question - it doesn't matter any more. SS has had it drummed into her she can't be away from mummy for more than 7 days. I'm not about to put any more pressure on her from this side on the matter.
...
Added By skovby1 on 18-09-2009
Normally I am very "anti" children calling anybody...
Added By BFS on 18-09-2009
Good call Skovby. You reminded me about the beers ...
Added By why? on 28-09-2009
i dont like the idea that a child calls someone mu...

Subject: minimising costs from decree nisi to consent order!
Posted By Uncle Dick on 18-09-2009
My wife and myself are in agreement as to the financial split of the sale proceeds of the marital home. so hopefully we can soon proceed towards the consent order, having already got the decree nisi. However my lawyers are pa...
Added By sometimesitdoesn'twork on 19-09-2009
There is actually quite a lot of skill and knowled...
Added By Uncle Dick on 19-09-2009
Many thanks for above comment. I am now wondering ...
Added By sometime |