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Subject: Children troubles again
Posted By Kat007 on 06-12-2009
When is this going to end please someone tell me argh,
Yesterday I recieved a C100 from the ex no court aknowledgement on it nothing no hearing date etc.
So on it he states he is going for residency of youngest because my behaviour is intolerable and child wants to live with him(the one he didn't want) he also says i stop contact and that he doesn't see child except everyother weekend. Which is rubbish he see's child two nights in the week every other weekend and anytime child says can i pop to dad's so very odd. Luckily I write all this on a calender and arrange contact with him via email weekly so evidence around. Section 5 RISK to child. Mrs kat is unreasonable and show's signs of parental alienation and child is at severe risk of developing depression because of Mrs Kats state of mind. This i found very odd as Mr Kat doesn't actually live with me and hasn't spoken to me for over two months.
He says I don't listen to child yet I do and have had to sit and listen to child call ex's GF a Wh**e today which he was reprimanded for and explained that sort of word is not acceptable and I would like you to treat GF with respect please and I never want to hear you say that again. He said sorry just fed up with GF having so much control over dad he isn't allowed to be with us on our own and I hate it. But again I had to explain that isn't really what's happening and they are a partnership and love each other, then I got well Dad doesn't love her he called her a F-ing bitch and loves you. OH dear this was becoming a bit difficult to discuss. Although I gave advice I do have to sit and wonder is this how child is feeling or is this what child thinks I want to hear. This is more likely bless.
I really do find all this draining and am fed up with keep having to drag myself to court everytime he decides he has nothing better to do and it costs me a fortune. It is really odd that all this percieved trouble regarding contact only appears to have come to a head since he last the last hearing.
So I was wondering will a judge change residence for child again and upset child or can I go to court argue the toss as to what child actually wants and needs which is a stable happy home, not one he doesn't know whether he will be chucked out or not. I know which one I would go for.
Follow up comments
Added By Jools123 on 06-12-2009
Hi Kat, how old is your child?
Personally I think you should just turn up on the day with all your evidence and prove what a good mother you are...I really don't think a judge would turn the residency around on the basis of his statements alone and provided you back everything up, stay calm you should be fine. But hey, I'm no expert....
Added By Simes 2p on 06-12-2009
Kat, you need to attack this on the basis of unwarranted harassment through the Courts, which needs to be stopped by a 91.14 order, and his case struck out, and base it on the previous shenanigans he played when he threw son out not that long ago.
Contact Cafcass tomorrow and ask for their advice if you can, BUT you need to do this either through a Sol or a McKenzie Friend. DON'T do it on your own.
Added By Kat007 on 06-12-2009
Hi Simes,
I ask my sol about the unwarrented harassment thing and he seemed to think that ex had not reached the point of the court saying bugger off leave the women alone and stop trying to take her to court because we won't allow you any more court time. How many times in a year can one person take another to court this will be 5 this year.
Did you mean that My sol can contact cafcass and ask them to ring me?
And Jool123, my child is old enough to voice his opinion about how he feels and where he wants to be living but he has never mentioned anything about moving to his dad's in fact the opposite tonight, said he loves being at home as he feels comfortable and safe chil is over 10.
Added By Simes 2p on 07-12-2009
Kat, 5 times in 2 or 3 years is enough to block him going back to court again. If it isn't asked for, you won't get it.
I think YOU should ring Cafcass and ask them for some advice.
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Thanks simes,
Will ring cafcass today and contact Sol too.
Added By juggler on 07-12-2009
Hi, Kat.
I'm going to ask for a 91.14 too (on Simes' advice!) as Thursday will be the 5th time I've been taken to court this year. Some years I've been taken up to 10 times so its nearly 40 times altogether for me over 5 years....
Best of luck, Kat.
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Ok spoke with the court house and his application was dealt with on the 2nd dec, hearing in Feb 2010, asked about what they class as harassment through court system and nobody could answer. E-mailed sol with court date and asked that we apply to court for your above order but he is in court this morning repping.
As for the harassment will they include the financial hearings and the children together or seperately?
Also rang cafcass and waiting for a call back.
thanks Simes I am so fed up with this me and the kids just want to move on and enjoy our lives together without all this C**P again.
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Solicitor said he didn't think a judge would agree to the 91.14 order, But I am still going to ask the barrister when I speak to her we can't keep doing this and Juggler good luck Thursday hope all goes well and look forward to a postive post after the hearing sending a hug too xxxxx
Added By Tania on 07-12-2009
Hi not been here for a while. I'm not sure how much things have changed since my court visits but here goes. It's not possible to give a precise definition of what's harassment - each case is viewed on its merits. At some point if you think you're being dragged to court just because the other side can then it can amount to harassment. I was able to get a section 91.14 order and I self repped, this was after about the tenth court appearance and included finance hearings too. I don't think you'll get the order without a judge hearing the merits or other wise of the application. CAFCASS were worse than useless (apologies for slagging off a whole organisation in three words).
I hope you get the outcomes you are both looking for. My advice is to stay calm and reasonable and let the other side dig their own hole and jump in feet first.
Added By Kat007 on 07-12-2009
Thanks tania,
Over the last 3yrs we have been to court and did check 10 times over finances and kids.
I will go to court and do what is right and show that I have maintained contact and changed when requested and that a schedule was drawn up but ignored and that the only reason for the application is purely due to ex losing the finance hearing 4 weeks ago. Funnyy how things had been working ok until that point really.
Added By Simes 2p on 08-12-2009
It isn't the number of times you go, its whether they are proper applications that are worth being made, or whether they are being used to harass.
2 wrong applications can result in a 91.14, or a civil restraint order if in civil law.
Added By Kat007 on 08-12-2009
Thanks again simes for the very useful info,
When I have to write my next position statement I will include that I feel Mr Kat is harassing me through the judical system. I am sure that when speaking with my barrister she will agree because I pay her too lol Just kidding.
Talking of paying recieved sols bill today OMG £7800 Parents bless are paying the bulk of this up until september ex having to pay £3k and me the rest when ex has paid the back dated SM which he is currently obtaining finance for. PHEW
Just been on all the compare sites to look at transferring debts etc but not many good deals around at the moment understandably. Thanks again speak soon I am sure. You are a star xxx
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