ONDIVORCE GENERAL AND CONTACT MESSAGEBOARD
[ADD YOUR COMMENTS] [LIST ALL SUBJECTS]
Subject: Amazing
Posted By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
So what a shock I got today yet another unecessary letter that has been answered 3 times now by letter and in court but clearly he is not listening or able to bloody read. OMG
Ex has asked my solicitor for medical evidence for him to look at as he feels that the evidence we provided at court as requested by the judge was not sufficient for him which is very odd as the judge thought it was sufficent. So I have had to write a letter in response although I didn't want to as every point he has raised again has already been answered. Next I bet he asks for access to my records LOL.
He did say that he has submitted evidence to court regarding the SR hearing so I wait to see what a really bad mother I am again. And have to write yet another statement to counter everything When will he just let things go and move on because all the time he does this he is not moving on to a happy relationship with his GF and not wanting me to move on either. Such an idiot.
Follow up comments
Added By Simes 2p on 16-12-2009
Kat,
What on earth is your Sol advising you?
He didn't like the evidence you submitted at Court. So F***ing what? tell him to swivel.
I can't believe your Sol didn't do the same.
Whats going on Kat, and just how much money have you paid this Sol you have.
I spoke to a woman yesterday who went through Ancillary Relief, fighting over £50K. Her Sols racked up £60K of bills, and she didn't get more than £20K of the pot.
Put your sensible hat on and wise up a bit.
Added By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
High Simes,
My solicitor hasn't advised anything as of yet, this letter was forwarded today by his secretary at his request as sol is in court until Friday morning.
I get what your saying though, I have written my response in your legal speak as have got so used to doing it that it saves me ££££'s in costs and just gets copied and pasted onto sols headed paper. And yes I have basically told ex to swivel but obviously in a legal way spouting the data protection act etc etc and that is was ok for the judge so tough shit really. I was fuming. He also asked what benefits I was getting that got a short answer along the lines of that if he had bothered to read the financial documents from the financial hearing he would see I do not recieve benefits. And not ask again. argh
I have also at the bottom of this letter requested he nolonger ask questions that he already has the answers to as the money I am having to use to reply surely would be better spent on our children's upbringing. I have also requested that he not keep asking for information that is not relevant to the case or about my medical history. Silly man.
How much money has he been paid about 8K as I have managed to keep letter writing costs down due to me writing them. Actually 5K as ex has to pay some of my costs and I will asks for costs awarded if he looses the next hearing.
Added By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
Sorry not HIGH Simes but Hi Simes then should be hope your well?
Added By Simes 2p on 16-12-2009
Kat,
I just don't understand at all why you are answering these letters.
If evidence was presented in Court, he had a copy. If he didn't like it, he should tell the Judge. Not ask later.
If he wants to know what benefits you get, its none of his business.
Anything else he asks, its none of his business.
Ignore the letters and don't respond to them.
Added By Kat007 on 16-12-2009
I didn't think you were able to just ignore any letters, the information he has requested I have just said that he has had the information already and not to ask again. As for benefits said it is none of his business and he should read the financial documents we gave him at court last time and requested he stop writing with irrelevant questions that he already has the answers too.
In his letter was a scchedule he is insisting I enforce immediately for contact which reduces my contact by half, which is odd considering I wasn't consulted on at all to which I have had to respond to as most of the letter was about contact issues he has.
I have drafted it and it hopefully will be the last one. Clearly the man needs to use his time more effectively rather than make up lies and try and ruin my kids and my relationship.
Added By Jools123 on 16-12-2009
Kat - I have to say, having been on this site for a good few weeks now, your ex husband cannot be happy (whether thats money or where he is with his life). He just keeps pursuing blind alleys imho and not living his life. His G/F must be hacked off with the situation.
You keep your chin up.
By the way - you dont have to respond to anything if you dont wish to. Especially if its already been addressed.
Added By Owl1 on 17-12-2009
Kat, you do not have to respond to any letters your ex sends. In fact you would be well advised not to. Especially since he is now a LIP.
Added By Kat007 on 17-12-2009
Thanks Guy's,
After re-reading your replies I have made a decission that if he asks question he has answers too or can gain the information by other means rather than keep bothering me then I will not respond. I have told my solicitor this and that the only contact needed is regarding weekly contact which we can sort between us without solicitors. House sale is the only other thing needing e-mail contact.
And Jools having this go on for what will be 2yrs 7mths I am fed up with him now. I understand what you say about ex not being happy(whether thats money or where he is with his life). I agree with you I don't think he is happy and frankly don't care, if he was truely happy with his lot he would not have kept trying to have an affair with me since last year and keep taking me back to court re:finances and kids.
He left to be with someone else who he professed to love(hmm) we had an affair for 8months after he left and when I ended it because it was toxic not only to me but to the kids, things got tough again. He settled down for a while then he tried to suduce me many times, which didn't work but he kept trying for 10 months and when he lost the last hearing he got the hump big time, this is not my problem if he is not happy and I refuse to take on his feelings, did that for over 20yrs, as far as I am concerned enough is enough and he needs to move on from me and learn that he can not control my life anymore he has no rights to me at all he also needs to try and enjoy his life with the GF that he chose.
And yes she must be well hacked off with his constant court hearings and moaning about how unfair things are in his life but then good she wanted him so she ended up with him warts and all and good riddance. I do know that she doesn't like the fact that we have to have contact regarding the kids and she does so her best to disrupt contact etc, I however don't allow that and keep the schedule on track unless Ex ask for a special occassion of course.
I just want to be free from the hassle and get on with my life with my children thats all I ask, I think I at least deserve that after the worst two years of my life. But clearly he doesn't think I do OH well I will continue to hold up my head as usual and try and live my life with the kids happily and healthily.
Added By obiwan_kenobi on 17-12-2009
what else can you do?
good luck kitty cat...
Added By Kat007 on 17-12-2009
Well I recieved the appointment today for the first directions hearing next year with a 20min meeting with CAFCASS(you know the agency he said were F***ing useless a slated in court etc) I know they are there to represent the childs needs and wishes which is good but the poor kids has been told so many things that aren't true about me he allegedly has said that child wants to live at Dads, well not surprised if he thinks mum is horrible to dad. I hope CAFCASS can unravel this again and that we can prove this is just a vicious attempt by the ex because of loosing the financial hearing.
I also have been told that until I put the solicitor in funds to represent me they can not put their name to the forms. Also has been said that they will need to clear the matrimonial finance account with them. Trouble is Parents have paid a large chunk of this ex is supposed to pay £2800 and me the rest with some of the arrears of SM. I could pay a chunk on my credit card but this will take me to the limit. Is it worth talking to their accounts department to set up a monthly payment to start chipping away at the monies owed?
Why does he feel he needs to keep doing this I am going to be financially and emotionally ruined which has far reaching consequences regarding moving as some of the SM arrears was to be set aside to cover letting agent fees and a months rent. If I use my card then the monthly amount will be horrendous. This is just a nightmare again. Bloody man needs to get over not being married to me anymore argh.
| 
